Your main problem is you have an anxiety problem. HOCD is just a label, and the more you attach that label to yourself the more you can start to believe it applies. The reason the term exists is the centuries we've been through of persecution of those who were gay, and that will take a long time to go away. So we all start out with a bias against gays, and even gay people suffer with this, because it makes it much harder to be gay than to be straight. It's a phobia a lot of people have, because we all have lots and lots of thoughts but we usually don't take them all that seriously. When you obsess over one, you've got a phobia. Whether you're gay or bi or straight isn't the issue, because that will be what it will be and your actions will determine that. If you've reached the age of 19 and have never been gay you probably aren't. But if you were, so what? The so what is, you have a bias against being gay, which we all do, and the thought stuck with you because you have developed an anxiety problem. Your therapist can help you with this assuming your therapist treats anxiety. Not all do. HOCD isn't really OCD, it's obsessive thinking, and all anxiety problems involve obsessive thinking or nobody would have one. I mean, if we're able to just let things go, no anxiety problem, right? That's the main thing you want to learn how to do. What most likely happened is, when people break up, often the one who didn't initiate the breakup gets really insecure, and starts to question things about themselves. Why did this happen? What did I do? What's wrong with me? What actually happens is, humans are cruel and fickle sometimes, and sometimes one person thinks something is a lot more than the other person does. You got rejected, and you got upset, and wondered what was wrong with you. Usually this happens first at a younger age than you're at, but it always hurts no matter how old or young one is to be rejected romantically. Your sexuality will take care of itself. Your anxiety problem and your insecurity problem needs some help. Peace.
ALSO: my family has had a history with have anxiety and overthinking. I have always been an overthinker, but i have never been diagnosed with Ocd, that’s why i have doubt it is, but it’s possible i have anxiety, but these thoughts make me believe that’s who i am and what i want and i’m lying to myself.
By the way i would always fantasize about guys and getting into a relationship. Now i can’t bc everytime it puts in a girl in the image. I also doubt if i am masculine or my style in clothes or things i say give off bisexual vibes. i Just want to forget all these thoughts and just go back to knowing and not doubting anything.
Also sorry if it get confusing and words that don’t make sense