OCD has me confessing everything !

[Losingit91]

I have really, really bad ocd... I find myself constantly confessing things. Anyways. To some this may sound dumb but in my irrational mind it was the right thing to do...I used to receive unemployment when I was laid off from my job... I didn't actually look for work because we get laid off yearly. I felt bad about not looking for work so I emailed the unemployment fraud department.. This was a few months ago... Now whenever I check my mail I'm afraid it will be something in there saying in going to jail... I also in the past used to get foodstamps.. I was always at my sis' house but didn't use her adress... I used someone else's adress saying I lived there. That too convicted me. I emailed the snap benefits and confessed. I was wrong in both cases for lying. Was emailing them the right thing to do .. A friend of mine said maybe going into the offices with the letters I emailed will help my anxiety so I won't be waiting around in fear. I'm not sure this is the best answer. I'm afraid. But also my anxiety is horrible. What should I do? I sometimes find myself using religious reasons as to why I should confess. Then I think to myself I will go to hell if I don't. I am always confessing something. I'm now afraid I will be arrested, charged with a felony and unable to find work. It could be years before they contact me.... But I don't have any money at all right now to go there if they were to make me repay anything

[mariabianca]

YES! trust me, the unemployment board will catch any error on their own. Don't open that can of worms because I honest think it can be confusing between the waiting week, then calling to collect for the week that passed the following week if you get a new job.

Relax!!! you did nothing wrong!!

[Losingit91]

Thank you !:) ... One last thing... So do you think it's ok if I don't go and open a can of worms by going into the unemployment office and confessing ? I asked God to forgive me.. I pray that he does...

[mariabianca]

I like both group & individual therapy. Sometimes I feel that I need the extra focus & 1:1 so I do the individual therapy. You need to do what your comfortable with & what helps you. It may take time to find someone you like & that's ok or you may like the first person you speak to. You have to remember to look for someone to treat OCD/anxiety. There is nothing you can say they he/she hasn't heard. Just be open & honest, it really does help. And, you have this forum that helps as well, you make friends & chat too :)

[Losingit91]

I willingly claimed 1 extra  week on unemployment.. I knew better .. I worked three days and when Sunday came I said I hadn't worked at all... That was the last time I claimed. So I am a horrible person... And thank you so much, I definitely will seek therapy.. I'm glad to be able to express myself in a forum and have people who understand the feelings of anxiety, hopelessness, racing thoughts and so on. Also, what is your opinion on group therapy ?

[mariabianca]

YOU ARE NOT A BAD PERSON. Sometimes people legitimately get their weeks confused because you're filing for the week prior. It will sort it self out, so relax.
Yes, I would definitely suggest a therapist. Once you start to speak he/she will know if medication would be needed. It was the best thing I ever did. Everything just stopped. The racing thoughts, the anxiety that twisted my chest, the nausea. I felt whole & good again.

[Losingit91]

Thank you so much.. I don't have Medicaid..I'm on my mothers insurance plan. I need to look for a therapist immediately !  I'm Christian... Idk how it's gotten this bad. I used to think it was my conscience but I know it's not... Then after I confess, I will realize I left something out and then feel worse... I even admitted the unemployment thing to my job... I also told them that I claimed one week when I first got called back.I needed to admit it to them because I didn't write that I had returned to work on my unemployment claim ... I am such a bad person... Ugh. Although my employer knows I still feel awful and guilty that I don't have the money for the one week I collected after returning to work. I would have, probably, if I didn't get called back in the middle of the week and had no money for the next two weeks.. Basically I stole a weeks pay from unemployment and now I feel horrible

[mariabianca]

I too feel the need to confess at times but usually only to my loves ones. Are you Roman Catholic? I always thought mine stemmed from that? Ok, first you have to take a DEEP BREATH. Second, are you on Medicaid? You should be able to qualify for it based on anxiety/OCD. If you have it, look for a therapist that can help treat it. The meds are only $1. Now as for the unemploymrnt, you can't be arrested.The most that can happen is that the next time you collect UI you will get a letter that says you can't collect benefits until XXX dollar amount is paid back. No jail time. I don't know about SNAP, but I'm sure if you produce your medical history that proves your anxiety & OCD all can be settled. These programs are supposed to help people not persecute them so I believe they will hear you out. The most important thing to do is take that deep breath first. THEN take that first step to a therapist.