I know we don't give HIV assessments anywhere but on the HIV forum and this forum is for discussion about OCD. You can feel better with OCD if you treat that condition. Anxiety and OCD are as much a disorder and disease as HIV. You need to talk to your doctor about it and get a treatment plan together. This can be a few things and they say that doing multiple things leads to the best outcome. Seeing a good psychologist and doing cognitive behavioral therapy and likely taking medicine will be recommended. Talk to your doctor because you CAN feel better but first you have to keep in mind what the real problem is, mental health. A good start at working on it was posting here seeing that your irrational thoughts are part of the obsessive thinking of anxiety.
I just wanna add I’ve been tested for hiv three times in the last three months with no exposures... except for “blood drawing” exposures...
I almost want to get tested again but I feel like this is just a merry go round of irrational tendencies that need to stop. I just want to feel better.