Length of time between reoccurence after second treatment???

[Sukee]

I have Stage 3 OVCA, and just found out that it is back after only 9 months.  I took the reoccurence news harder than the initial news, for I was SURE I would beat it.  (I was diagnosed Jan. 2005...debulking surgery, 7 rounds of carboplat/taxol.)  

My new oncologist is offering an opportunity to use Abraxane (a trial situation) and I'm thinking of taking it.

He told me my life will consist of going on and off chemo.  Ok, Im up for that...but when I asked him if my remissions would be about the same length of time/longer/shorter??? he answered "shorter".  OMIGOSH!!!  This is the worst news ever to me!  Don't tell me that!  And WHY DID I ASK!!!  Does he really know???

I have spent the last 24 hours in a deep depression.  Any words of advice to help me get that old fighting spirit back?  

I have an eighth-grade boy, and I MUST MUST MUST see him graduate from high-school.  

I am hoping someone out there can offer me something that will lift me up from this paralyzing fear I am experiencing.  I have faith in God and don't fear dying...just fear leaving my kids too soon.

I have read so many wonderful things on this forum.  I hope you all have a wonderful Mother's Day tomorrow!!!

[Sukee]

Thank you all for your inspiring words...they brought me to tears, but this time they were tears of graditude for the great advise I received!

Dian, my nickname "Sukee" is a second choice because Sukie and Suzie were taken.  It does look weird though, huh?  You're right, all I can do is fight the battle and go for it!  Tybear, I have stopped feeling sorry for myself, and will think of your attitude and send you a special prayer for you and your little guy (I loved 3!!!) every day.  

I am loaded and armed for battle...RavenLady Darlyn...everyone...thank you and have a terrific Mother's Day.
Susan

[MickeyVicki]

I am so glad to see your post.  Also, I am glad to know  you are doing well!

[dian07]

What does your name mean?   Look,  you are in a bad spot right now...I can certainly understand your having a feeling of desperation, but, I have read many, many times that a diagnosis of ovarian cancer is a diagnosis of a cronic battle ....that means it goes on and on...it means you must fight battle after battle....and, if you are taking part in a trial...how does he know how long your remissions will be....doesn't make sense to me.  All you can do is fight each battle as it presents itself...easy for me to say as I have not had chemo for 7 months now...I don't know how long I will be "chemo free" either...but I will fight just as you will....nobody knows how it will turn out after each bout of chemo...hopefully this will be your last sentence....please stay in touch....I cannot imagine you won't be around to love and influence your son's children...shoot for that.
Peace to you and your family.
Happy Mother's Day!

dian

[RavenLady]

Welcome to the Forum Sukee!
      Dian is right, of course, so are you up for the fight?  You agreed to the trial and I admire that!  You go Girl!!!!  I am the self appointed scribe of the Batallion, as we call ourselves, Dian named us!  I am the poster Girl of the 99% club whereas you are an esteemed member of the 1% Sisterhood.  Sucks but that's the hand you have been dealt and I am with Dian!  Shoot for the grandkids!  Goals mean something!  Welcome to the Batallion Sukee!  Glad to have you as a Cyster!  MV

[Gatsby]

You are in my thoughts and prayers.  Godspeed
~Tascha

[suzsen]

You are in my thoughts and prayers.  My mom is currently in remission and dreading a recurrance.  

Your fears sound just like mine when I found out I had a cyst and feared it was cancerous.  I have an 11th grade son and an 8th grade daughter and all I could think was, "I have to be here until she graduates from high school!"

I have heard/read many stories of women who have had recurring ovca for 8 years or more.  Hopefully each time they will have a new and better drug for you, and newer and better ways to control side effects, until they find the one drug that cures you!

[DebiR]

I am so sorry that this news has not been good for you.  But I agree with everything that has been said.  You cannot embrace the illness, you MUST embrace the wellness.  I am in the 99% club with regard to ovca - but am a thyroid cancer survivor.  Though much my treatable, my thyca has been very exasperating and continues to pop up requiring more treatment.   I have read a lot about what makes a successful cancer patient and the biggest thing of course is attitude.  Those who BELIEVE they will be well seem to have a much better rate of survival.  I have witnessed it with two close friends who were given a very short time (six months in one case) and are thriving 6-8 years later.   What I have learned from my experience is that the doctors really don't know and can only guess.  

I am reading Wayne Dyers latest book about living and inspired life.  It is really good and he talks about attracting what it is you want in your life by attaching your spirit to it and recognizing that God wants good things for you.  If you attach your spirit to a negative outcome than that is the way it will go.  

Also, know that we are ALL here for you.  Your fellow 1% can stand next to you and give you the wisdom of their experience and share their knowledge.  Your 99% cysters will  stand behind you and offer prayers, love and support - kind of like a stone wall for you to lean on when you feel yourself falling backward.  Hang in there sweetie - rejoice with your son in this Mothers Day morning.  God bless you.

[Tybear]

I too, was diagnosed with 3c ovarian cancer last September at the age of 26. I can appreciates your feelings right now. I have accepted that there may come a day when I am defeated by this horrible disease, but I will never give up - my 3yr old little boy is my reason for living. I am anxiously awaiting my first post chemo CT scan June 22nd, and have thoughts every single day about my cancer... is it back? when will it be back? will they catch it in time? How are we supposed to live life like this? I have always said everything happens for a reason, but I haven't quite found the reason in this! You did beat it once, and although it may not seem like it right now, you can and will do it again. I'm so sorry all you got was 9 months - that hardly seems fair after all the work you did the first time. The chemo worked once and it will work again - you have to believe this. You will see your child graduate because you can accept nothing less. I have no idea how much time I have until this beast rears it's ugly head again, so I will stop feeling sorry for myself (a habit that is far too easy to do)celebrate Mommy's day with my little man, and say a prayer for you and your family. Do something special to celebrate your day and, as hard as it will be to do, try not to let cancer ruin it.
Becky
p.s. If your looking for something inspirational, go to www.thesurvivormovie.com.

[sueg]

Hi,
I was diagnosed 3c Feb.2005.Had surgery,followed by carbo/taxol which I finished in August-given the all clear-the cancer was back by December,just 3 months in remission-wow!!
I can undestand the shock your in.I'm 46 and thought I would live forever-I'm still determined to!!
I am on Caelyx(Doxil)now,I was having three cycles of it then surgery if the tumor had shrunk,but it hasn't-it also hasn't grown either-so thats good,so I've just had my fourth cycle and I'm off to the greek islands on Friday for two weeks.I've got a suitcase full of pills and I'm going to have fun in the sun with my lovely hubby and two children.I'm leaving the cancer in a luggage locker at the airport and I'll collect it on my way home.
Just enjoy every day your here-I do!!
Love
Sue. x

[Lh]

I was dx January 2001, Stage IIIC initially, then downgraded to IV three weeks later when cancer found its way into my neck lymph nodes.  No one was optimistic that I'd live out the year.  In May 2003 a liver tumor was removed and I had six more chemos.  It's now May 2006, one year longer than my first remission and I'm still here and doing well.  My doctor also treats this illness as chronic.  I don't know how long this remission will last, and I'm under no illusions that I am cured, but what I do know is that if the beast rears its ugly head again, I will fight it to my last breath.  I find it interesting when people ask how long I have.  My usual reply is, "I could outlive you."  And that's the truth.  No one knows.  God bless.

[Krull1]

Yes the women here are wonderful and spirit lifting. They will be along shortly. (depending on time zones) I will surely keep you in my thoughts and prayers and I will light a candle in your honor at our Mother's day mass tomorrow. Let your faith guide you.  Happy Mother's day to you also!!!
HUGS,
Darlyn

[MickeyVicki]

There is really no way to know.  All I can do to help is to tell you that a woman living and working in my community was diagnosed with ovca, at stage 3.  She refused to take 'no' for an answer, and used every drug or trial medication she could access.    She lived 9 years. Even then, she did not actually die of her cancer.  Her immune system was so compromised by the chemotherapy regimen that she succumbed to infection.  She even worked in the family business until the week before her death.

Some friends had a close friend who had more or less the same story, but his fight was against liver cancer.  He died, ironically, in an automobile accident; his death was nine years after his diagnosis.  By the way, he was told that he had six months to live.

Your doctor told you that your life would consist of going on and off chemo.  Did he give you any clue as to how long that life might be?  I ask because I can no longer count on my fingers and toes the number of people I know who have been diagnosed with cancer, then were given an estimate of the time they had left, and yet lived two or three times that estimate.  Cancer treatment is exploding with new drugs and techniques.  I am sure you saw the news report in the past month or so that last year, cancer deaths actually fell.   Well, the new treatment methods are largely responsible for that news.

Honestly, though, there is nothing that we can say to help.  That is because you know exactly what to do...fight!...and you have a good reason to do it!