Maybe if I had sense enough to pull my shirt down and stop staring at it I would calm down some. Marie
Seems it would be pretty hard to ignore. And to think I used to complain about zits. What a wimp I am. When does your onc come back? I would ask again, someone with authority. NPs are very helpful and easy to talk to most of the time but I'm not comfortable with her making the serious decisions.
I think my onc has been in and out of the office going to seminars. I am going to call and try to talk to her this week before next chemo. I just want surgery asap. Even if it wont buy me much time I want this thing off me. I feel like a feak show. My grandson almost threw up when I showed him. He begged me never to let him see it again. I remember Becky had some tumors come out through the skin in her last year or so. I just am so sick of all the disgusting things this disease throws our way. Marie
I am lost for words - I cannot imagine how this must feel for you.
I have tried writing this next sentence so many times I am not sure how to put it into words. Whatever I think of saying just seems trite.
I guess that whether this thing was visible or not, they would want to continue treatment if there is benefit. I remember from your other posts that the treatment has worked in other areas so perhaps they are giving that the maximum hit before stopping chemo. If they stop now and do surgery, they won't be able to restart until next year and so doing a couple treatments more may be the best way. It's a terrible dilemma to have this thing visible while waiting for a scan, a scan that will tell you what you already know. What you might not know is that the chemo may be shrinking these other places, making success at surgery more likely. I know I sound like I am trying to find the positives without really knowing the facts, that might be true. What also might be true is that it might be right.
I think you should try to see your doctor or someone of the same level of experience ASAP. As good as NPs can be, they don't always have the experience of the emotional toll that this brings to bear. They will likely have better information and will be able to set out the options in a better way.
It is strange how you and my wife are going along similar lines. She now has a very visible hernia in front of a place where her scan shows a growth. She also wants surgery but is, at the moment, still getting just about getting through chemo.
As always, our thoughts are with you.
Oh, Marie. I am so sorry and I would also be freaked out. Although I truly appreaciate the care that our docs give to us, I do think they sometimes become insensitive to how hard this is on the individual person. You will be in my prayers and I hope there is a way to rid you of this visible tumor and that you will have strength to endure the next round! Hang in there!
I don't have anything to add to what has already been suggested other than to continue to try to talk with your onc.
It's a rough patch for you, Marie, but try to hang in there. Every day that we survive is another day closer to a cure.
Oh Sweetie, I am sorry. I can't imagine having a tumor visible to me. It was bad enough having another tumor in me and when my doctor started giving me all these options, chemo, biopsy, surgery. I looked at him and said unless there is some medical reason, I want the dang thing OUT of me ASAP!!
I wish too that I could you some great words of wisdom, I can't. I can just be here to listen and support you in anyway I can.
My grandson is 2 1/2 and it's hard to tell him to sit nice next to maw maw as he knows I have an Ouchie, but when my daughter wanted to see my incision, and grant it-it's only an incision, she was absolutely grossed out, she was completely taken back on just that.
Talk to your docs, I can't imagine they wouldn't listen to what YOU want. Sometimes you have to look those NP in the eyes, lift your shirt, and say, hey what would you want if this was happening to you?
Giving you a big cyber hug :)
Thanks everyone. After a good night's sleep I am less upset. I will just do these treatments and see what the next scan shows and go from there. I am feeling okay, considering I was treated yesterday. I will go vote in a few minutes and continue my day as if I had never seen the new look of the tumor. You all give me so much strength that a simple thank you is inadequate. Marie
Hi Marie~ I'm sorry to hear what you are going through. I just can't imagine what that must be like. The Doctor "run around" somehow makes things worse, too.I honestly don't know what I would do in your position, but some of the things I could see myself doing aren't legal! But then, you are stronger than me as witnessed by how you are bearing up under all you have been through and how you continue to handle all this with strength and dignity. Wish there was something I could do for you and all the others here. Sending you good thoughts and best wishes~
Thank you. I am dealing with it much better now. It freaked me out when it first came through the skin. Now I just try to remind myself of how much Becky and others went through and how strong they were and I try my hardest to follow their lead. Though many of my great examples of strength are gone now, they still seem to help me every day. Marie
It's been a while since I checked in here on Medhelp. I am SO sorry to hear your cancer has progressed. It is shocking to hear that a tumor has broken through your abdomen. Isn't this a rare occurence? I think I remember one other lady having that problem. If it is through the skin, wouldn't radiation be a possibility?
I am going to your profile area now to try to catch up on you. I hope and pray you respond to treatment right away and that God is keeping a close eye on you and your peace of mind.
I know of a very few that have had tumors pop through the skin. I am going to ask about radiation and surgery after these last 3 treatments. It is just amazing how we can have all these horrible things happen to our bodies and we just adjust to it like it's no big deal. When it first popped out I was in shock, then a few days later it has become my new normal. An alien-like tumor out of the bellybutton? Oh well, let's go to Wal-mart and come home and order a pizza. I guess it is a form of denial, but I am glad I can do it. How are you doing? I was gone from the forum a long time, but have been checking in alot lately. I hope all is fine with you. Marie
Doxil took care of the cancer in my abdomen, but I have multiple tumors just under the skin in my pelvic/pubic area. I don't think there is one Dr. who hasn't seen me with my pants up, or on.
The tumors are where the thigh meets the leg, and continues between my legs. In addition I have a large area of induration (hardening and thickening of cancer skin) where a bikini would cover and that has bled a few times.
My oncologist has sent me for radiation and I'm having 2 types, electron and photon done to the areas, 5 days a week. The area is too complex for surgery, or skin grafting.
It's painful and in such a bad and delicate area as you can imagine. It's also increased my fatigue level.
I hope I've given you a little information regarding radiation, and my also having tumors under the skin. I also look at it several times a day, it's just human nature to do that.
Let's keep in touch, I haven't posted because it's painful and just so depressing to deal with this chronic horrible disease.
I could see mine for a long time just beneath the skin. One day I just felt a little burning quick pain and the skin was broken and there it was. It is sort of a bluish gray. The grandbabies are both grossed out and intrigued by it. I just want my treatments done so I can move on to getting it off of me. Marie
Marie, I am constantly in awe of your strength and adaptability. My heart goes out to you and hope and pray they can get this addressed ASAP. Hugs, Trudie
Thanks for your support. I am in great shape today. Painted some woodwork and am making a meal for all the kids. Chemo tomorrow, but knowing only 3 more treatments til a scan is helping me get through it. Aleisa, the baby, keeps lifting up her shirt to check her own bellybutton. I think she is expecting something gross to pop through hers too! Poor baby. Marie
Oh Marie, you are truly an inspiration. I home that this disease will never rob us of one thing, our hope, spirit, humor, and our ability to smile, no matter what, and #1 our ability to be, truly a smart-arse LOL If we went thru life fretting and biting our nails and going whoa as me, we might as well just sit in a corner, even though we deserve to biotch and moan, scream and yell, most of all we deserve to LAUGH AND SMILE!!
My husband was looking at my incision with a magnifying glass as since there is no staples and he couldn't see any stitches, he was amazed at how something so big was being kept together, and didn't understand how my guts weren't falling out when I stook up *blank stare*, then I just had to bust out laughing.
My first surgery I had a ton of staples, but the one last year I had only glue. I felt safer stapled up. If they remove my bellybutton who knows how they'll close that up??? Crochet, macrame',buttons, zipper??? I don't care as long as they take out the alien tumor thing. I had chemo today. 2 more til the tell all scan. In some ways I hate to know what the scan will uncover. Marie