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140437 tn?1215109742

Victoria

Victoria left us at 12.05 yesterday after so much suffering, such a will to live - boy did she want to live. You know I kept coming in here hoping someone else would have written this - someone else will do it, I dont have to face it. Thats not what Victoria would have done for me though is it? Friday she posted a message asking my dear friends to think of me and what I didnt realise at that time was that she didnt have long left. Still she was putting me first - hiding the truth of her illness to protect me. How many people do you know like this? I will rephrase, how many 16 year olds do you know who are like this? She never asked anything of anyone - only knew how to give. I told her that thinking of her was the only thing that got me through every hour without my baby. So she didnt tell me there were not many hours left so I would stay strong.

I can not find the words to do this beautiful child justice I am simply not equal to the task. So why have I stopped snivelling behind the sofa to leave this message now. Well because her partner - Vadim - who sat there until the end tells me that she felt so isolated and lonely and afraid and felt that no-one cared. She felt that no-one cared and he still feels it. People have been - he says - so matter of fact about her illness in life and there has been little impact now that she has gone. I let her down. It doesnt matter what I did or didnt do or say I let her down simply because of the way she felt. That is my cross to bare. vadim thinks no-one cares he is wrong. The irony of the situation is that she was so strong she never truely reached out as she didnt want to worry anyone. He thinks no-one will respond to this - he is going to be wrong about that too.

My words dont speak as loudly as seeing this spirit for yourselves so I am posting some links so that you can see what the world has lost.

I love you Victoria

Anna X
39 Responses
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Avatar universal
Miss you very much....
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I am so very sad hearing that Victoria died. NYClady told me everything about Victoria because I did not know. My thoughts and prayers are with Victoria and all her loved ones. I will never forget these angels.The only solace I have is to know Victoria is with her mother and they are free and flying. Love, Helen
Helpful - 0
194838 tn?1303428544
I am so very sorry of your loss . I never knew Victoria but read enough of her posts to realise what a beautiful caring person she was.  So young and wise and ready to help others even though she was battling her own illness . God bless  you . Angie
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Wow..I am in utter shock. This young lady just wrote to me last week about my symptoms and if my daughter needed someone to talk to. I can't believe it. This is such a tremendous loss. Vadim I am so sorry for you and pray that you find some peace in your heart. I know she was young but wow she did a lot. Those videos Anna are spectacular and Jan those are beautiful pictures and a lovely letter. I am so sorry everybody.
Helpful - 0
272338 tn?1252280404
I too had to wait to post. I just did not know what to say. Although I never knew Victoria personally I knew that she was a very special person. I am shocked and deeply saddened by her pasing. For a 16 year old she has been through more than a lot of us could ever imagine. She is with God now, and her mother is there beside her. Thankfully now she is happy and in a better place.
Anna-marie, I can feel your grief and I am so sorry. If there was something I could to do help ease your pain, I would.
Vadim, you had a very special woman in Victoria. My heart goes out to you.

May she rest in eternal peace.
         Chris
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Privet all here. I just like say thank you much for think Viktoria. It very sad for me she gone and I misss her very much. This be her memorial for me. I like especially thank couple people.

Debbie...you knew Viktoria feel so lonely and sad and make time call her many times day. What you say and so mean so much her and me because it make her not feel so forgotten. You help us search best doctors and doing this maybe she get chance be here longer me. She know you love her and she love you.

Anna...it always mean much Viktoria that you make her godmother prawny. She knew never have children so very special her be godmother. She loved your humor when spoke and think of you often.

Pam thank you reach out her too. She enjoy when you chat her on computer and missed not being able get on computer much the last month.

Jan thank you reach out her write too. It mean much someone not able get out bed much here words others.

Viktoria think about all you and worry about all you everyday. She want all you get better since her mother not able. I pray best for all you.

Vadim

Helpful - 0
135691 tn?1271097123
I read this yesterday but didn't post...I didn't know what to say and still don't. Words cannot describe what a shock this was to read. Anna, I know how close you and some others had become to Victoria...you helped her through what must have been the most difficult time in her life. The only thing that even comforts me in the slightest is knowing she has her mom's loving arms wrapped around her at this very moment - that she's not alone.
Love Becky
Helpful - 0
198506 tn?1251156915
I just wanted to offer my sincere condolence during this very sad and trying time.  From what I have read above it seems Victoria earned her wings long before she entered Paradise. Though I do not post here I hope you will allow me to grieve with you for this world's loss of the precious angel, Victoria, who was clearly loved by so very many.  I hope that those close to her will find some peace.  You are all in my prayers.    
Helpful - 0
10947 tn?1281404252
We were deeply saddened to hear that Victoria died yesterday.  The comments posted above are so touching and clearly a loving tribute to Victoria from her many friends.

Our thoughts and prayers are wiith Victoria, her loved ones and friends.

Cindy Thompson and everyone at MedHelp International
Helpful - 0
229895 tn?1261601948
I am so sad to hear of the passing of such a young caring person as Victoria obviously was. I send my condolences to her boyfriend Vadim and all of her family

Jenny
Helpful - 0
329994 tn?1301663248
I was so saddened to read this post this morning.  From what I read on postings over the last few months, Victoria was a very special woman, very strong and from what I read on here, everyone gave her tremendous support and love, as she did for all of you.   May God bring peace and comfort to all of you and to Vadim.... Colleen
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
For one so young, Victoria has left us with nice memories of how well she handled her Mum's illness... and her own. I had no idea how ill Victoria was, and feel so sorry that she will no longer be part of our family here. My sincere condolences go to her boyfriend...Vadim, and other members of her family. May she now rest in eternal peace with her dear Mum.   Warm hugs to all...Helen...
Helpful - 0
295767 tn?1240188314
I too was very shocked by this. Victoria was a beautiful, strong, young woman who is now with her mother. She was so special and her kindness showed through in all of her posts.
God speed Victoria. With love, Deandra
Helpful - 0
146692 tn?1314331773
I do not have any elegant words left in me, my heart breaks for you Vadim. I am so sorry Victoria suffered, but am grateful she had you in her life. I think God makes sure, that all of us have that one person..that we can lean on when time gets hard. I am so glad she had you Vadim.

Friends are angels, who lift us to our feet,
when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly.
author unknown

God Bless you and give you the strength, to find peace, as Victoria now has in heaven.
Butterflytc
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
This must be why they say Only the Good Die Young..................this is heart breaking..............God Bless Her and Keep Her in the Palm of Your Loving Hands. Amen
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I held off on posting, I didn't get the chance to know Victoria but have heard soooo many wonderful things about her. She was truly a sweet and cherished soul. Just so young, makes me so sad. May she and her mom find peace -- and I guess this is my wish too:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HU1OaCglgw0

"You're in the arms of the angels ... may you find some comfort here"

Wishing peace and comfort to everyone here,
Fran
Helpful - 0
41502 tn?1223517053
I am so sorry to hear about Victoria. I only knew about her after she lost her mom. Vadim , I know she loved you dearly and you took such good care of her. May God bless you and give you strength in the days to come.     Donna
Helpful - 0
394610 tn?1326725395
New here, but very sorry to hear this sad story!  Watched the video.  Beautiful - speachless.  Will pray.

Carol
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106886 tn?1281291572
I am just stunned. I had no idea she was failing. So very sad.

Mary
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I am so saddened at this news.  In her posts, Victoria was always such a generous, caring, inspirational person and so very young.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I'm am so saddened to hear of Victoria's passing.  I never got the chance to know her on a personal basis, but her courage, her strength and her heart could never be overlooked...Star, you had it so right in saying that she brought a ray of sunshine with her, because that young woman certainly did.

Anna, I'm so sorry for all of you losses you have been having to experience this way.  Victoria did come her for you that day she posted...she truly loved you.  I hope you don't go long feeling you failed her, because you didn't...if you had failed her honey...she wouldn't have been thinking of you to come post though your difficult time when she was having your own.  You were strength to her when she lost her mother and you stuck up for her like a mother would when her own couldn't.  I know she may have not been letting you know her health condition, but I hope you can come to think of the fact that in her heart she loved you so much that she couldn't see you hurt more...that child was truly amazing.  I can't help but think somewhere in her heart it brought her comfort to know she was trying to protect you.

Jan- Your feelings for Victoria were also quite evident here.  I know she truly touched your heart.  Your own strength and caring heart for others touches me greatly.  

I have a feeling that when she reaches her mother..they will continue to watch over the both of you for a long time to come....

Vadim-I never got a chance to meet you, but please know I will be thinking of you through this difficult time.  Your love for Victoria was so evident and strong for such a young couple.  You gave her more than many of will know in a lifetime...you can hold on to that thought forever...cause that is so true and I'm sure she knew it too.  Please know that that lovely lady of yours will remain in our hearts always.  
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I knew she was sick but I didn't know how critical.  I am truly heartbroken.  God bless you all, each and everyone of you.  I know Victoria is with her mom now, and may the knowledge of that bring you peace.  The world hasn't lost a great soul, the soul is just in a different place now.  Shannon
Helpful - 0
178783 tn?1197300099
I have to admit that I had no idea that Victoria was so sick, so this comes out of nowhere.  I am in absolute shock.  I will say this, between seeing my daughters strength in dealing with her own ovca and the way Victoria continued to reach out to others in her time of loss and failing health, I have renewed respect and admiration for the next generation. Gods speed Victoria and my condolences to her family, friends and all that knew this very special young woman.  

God Bless,
Bob
Helpful - 0
282804 tn?1236833591
i realized i forgot to spell out the user id.  i hope you all get a chance to see it.
toughbroads at yahoo dot com
Helpful - 0
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