your not alone ok try a support group and meds
Hi there, I know VERY well what trauma and abuse feel like and NO ONE deserves it ok?? You do not deserve what happened to you. Parents should not scream at , hit, or threaten their kids, period. My mom would yell at me daily, scream, hit me, and made me believe for YEARS I was bad and weak. She was very ill and yet I believed she was right:( I believed geesh I must be dumb.. geesh I shouldn't have said that, geesh I must be incapable. it made my life hell and even now as an adult I doubt myself SO much :( She had no right to make me feel so low, when I did nothing. YOU did nothing, ok? You were a child that needed love and safety.. I'm sorry all that heppened friend. Know that that place is no longer with you and that you are OUT of there *hugggg. you have a lot to live for, ok???? You have joy to live for, a new path, a new mind, a new life. I sometimes feel how can i ever get out of my hell; I still live with my mom and am in my 30's b/c of PTSD I've had. I want to cut all ties, and NEED to. I'm so glad your mom has been lighter to and for you now, and I hope things can go easier with you both. I want myself a NEW life, and we deserve it... you do NOT need to leave this earth ; ok ???? You have talents, hopes and wants, and who can help your own being get those into the world but You? You are so strong, and will be OK after all this *Huggg. Look into more therapy, I'm doing that myself actually too.