My wife of 15 years has had ongoing mental health issues that she says stem from being raped at 16. Now, over 25 years later she has had a period where she took an overdose of sleeping tablets (but knowingly not enough to die), so she could "sleep for a week and have a break", and has just had another similar episode and was detained under the mental health act for 30 days.
Also, 3 months ago she got too stressed with the kids and called child services to say "send help or I'm going to kill them".
Last year she was hospitalized 3 times; twice for sudden asthma attacks (she hasn't had asthma symptoms for years), as well as a sudden back issue for which she was given morphine and had an apparent allergic reaction too which caused her to become paranoid and shaky (despite having morphine before).
There have been numerous instances of her taking time off work on a prolonged basis either for stress type symptoms, or following a minor medical illness.
She has gone through periods of changing from part time to full time, to not working to be with the kids, and then not working but having the kids in pre-school.
There is always a drama of some sort if I am away from home for work, occasionally causing me to have to take emergency flights back or cut short a Trip and drive home.
She has been in and out of counselling, on and off of meds for years. She is quick tempered and gets very angry and upset if things don't go how she planned or thought.
She works in mental health and is very aware of the system. After her most recent episode her psychiatrist sent her to a different hospital to where she works and told me it was because she is manipulative to those she knows and he needed a fresh pair of eyes to treat her.
I have consistently been her support through periods of issues, but I feel that now we have young children (who have special needs such as autism, ADHD), I can't give my energy to her any longer and that it is causing me to become mentally unwell myself to have to keep supporting her, hold down my job and support my kids.
Her family, her friends etc have told me that they believe I am doing the right thing. I have been told about issues she has portrayed that are not real, as well as other concerning issues.
She is currently in hospital and has told me she has been diagnosed with PTSD and that this explains everything. I just don't get how after years of counsellors and doctors etc, this is suddenly the miraculous diagnoses that fixes everything, and I worry that she has steered things this way. I don't even know whether or not to believe the event at 16 happened and this was also questioned by a close family member of hers.
I'm at my wits end. I'm breaking up my family and I feel it's for the good of the kids and my own mental health, but I need advice.