1187071 tn?1279369698

Another sad loss

My mom just emailed me and she didn't want to tell me cause she never likes to tell me bad news but that is what makes her such a great mom. My dads long time friend, this guy I grew up with seeing just about every single weekend. He was a good guy but had a drinking problem but always had a big heart. He died yesterday of a drug overdose. I guess it was pain meds and I don't know what kind but I do know he will be missed.
Best Answer
547368 tn?1440541785
My Dear Jamie,

As you know I recently lost my dad to a terminal illness. The pain of a loved one's death can be overwhelming regardless of how or why they died. My heartaches for you and your father.

I agree with Sara, "Breath Jamie Breath." Remember all the wonderful memories you are left with, the lessons he taught you through the love of his big heart.  

We all have our own demons, they just come in different forms. It's too early to know and you may never know if this was a true drug overdose, a drug reaction or an uneducated mixing of drugs and alcohol. Something he may have done a hundred time before that for one reason or another went wrong. But it really doesn't matter why or what. he is gone and the ones that are left behind are the ones that are now suffering.

What I have learned is that the sun still comes up and the moon still rises. Ppl still love, and unfortunately still hate, they still laugh and they still cry. It's called living. And that is exactly what your father's friend would want you to do, live.

So grieve what ever is appropriate for you but please dear Jamie, keep living. You have children and yourself to care for and be concerned over. Don't dwell on his death or the what ifs. Celebrate his life and the gifts he gave to all that loved him.

“I wanted a perfect ending. Now I’ve learned, the hard way, that some poems don’t rhyme, and some stories don’t have a clear beginning, middle and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what’s going to happen next.”
* Gilda Radner

Gentle (((HUGS)))
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Avatar universal
Jamie, sorry for your loss and for your family.  Tuck couldn't have said it better.  Loss is loss no matter the reason.  I wish there were words that could help, but there aren't.  I'm sorry covers it all.
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1187071 tn?1279369698
Thank you all.
Tuck I can't agree with you more. It really don't matter how he died but the fact is that his children and wife and friends will miss him.
When I was growing up I had a cousin that I was very close to. We was the same age so we did everything together and even tho we was the same age I looked up to him. When I was 20 and pregnant with my daughter I got a phone call from my mom telling me that he went out to a New Years Eve party and drank way to much and walked home and when he was walking home he passed out and fell half into the river and half out. It was cold out and since he was passed out and couldnt wake up he frooze to death. I blamed him for drinking and then thought to myself that is not the way to think about it, he was a loved one and he was a good kid and he was gone and I will miss him for the rest of my life and I still love him.
Thanks alot
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Avatar universal
Wow, things just aren't going very well for you.  I'm so sorry for you.  
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1301089 tn?1290666571
Jamie:  I am so sorry.  Even when our friends have "demons" their loss doesn't hurt any less.  No matter the problems our friends have we love them.  And their loss is always painful.  You and your family have my greatest sympathy.

Please don't let this tragedy stress you.  You need to remain as calm as you can while you are waiting (again) to see the PMP.  Just try to remember  all the good times and pleasant memories of him.  BREATHE Jamie, BREATHE!!  

Again, don't let this cause your pain to increase.  And you and your family have my sympathies.

Helpful - 0
1310633 tn?1430224091
I'm sorry for your Father's loss.

Your Dad's friend, unfortunately, is a large part of the reason that PM's are so hesitant to deal with folks that have a history of addiction/alcoholism. The incidence of relapse and overdose increase dramatically when dealing with alcoholism & addiction, in the PM world.

As namnam said, I hope he's at peace now and out of pain, and has escaped the demons he so obviously had.

Silver lining... he's in a better place now.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal

I'm so sorry to hear about your Dad's Friend.

I hope that he is at peace now and out of Pain and has escaped from his demons.

Sending prayers for him and his family and to you and your family also.....Sherry
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