Fired from pain management August 1, 2014

[Carmalon]

This is my very first forum or question EVER submitted on Internet. I have been so torn up since I received THE CERTIFIED LETTER from my pain doctor. First guys, I must admit I was kicked out for my own fault, so please don't be too hard on me.  I have and my family has already, not to mention the doctors office done that.  I am taking full responsibility for this, but I cannot find anyone or any advice to help me. Ok, I took my husbands morphine before I went to see him ( like a few days before first appointment ) and 1st test was positive he sent a letter and told me to explain it. I did, then he said he hesitated to send me that letter because I was not under contract when I took it, so he would not give me a strike. I was very thankful. Then, a few months later I had a lot going on with my fathers health, husband, teenage son,etc...I told him I took some Xanax that was my friends because I ran out of my Valium, but wanted to be honest with him. He said, well, that's a strike for you, but I will give you 45 instead of 30 Valium. I apologized and thanked him. He thanked me for the truth. Ok, here it goes... In June I took a UA and he gave me scripts for all my meds June and July. Then I get THE LETTER AUGUST 1 stating he is firing me for failing my UA in June for morphine a second time which I had admitted to taking my husbands before I started pm and that he would no longer see me because that was the 2nd time positive for it. Ok, why was I not notified 2 months ago and that 1st time I was not under a contract and he told me he wouldn't hold it against me. This is no excuse, just the truth to why I took it a second time. My Husband and I went to Tulsa for the day and we got stranded there overnight with a family emergency and I did not have my meds. I only expected to be gone 6 -10 hours and my husband carries his old script with him when his back hurts. He had 2 pills and he took one and I took it because I didn't expect to be w/o mine that night! I didn't want to hurt cause my blood sugar goes so high when I hurt! My lupus will flare and RA WILL START IN HURTING, then goes the FIBERMYALGIA .  My ER CO PAY IS 300.00, so like a total idiot, yes I took it to hold me over till the next morning and guess what! 3 days later? YEP, UA test! I did it to myself, just didn't want to hurt ;(. My husband went to his office at closing hours and basically just asked him what to do and he said go to er for withdrawal. They may or may not help her. My husband told him tomorrow we are going to the endrocronologist because her blood sugar went so high for days from this stress. He did not care. My husband said he understood why I was fired, but how can I get treatment again? He sent a cc to all of my doctors of the firing letter, but said for me to have my pcp refer me to another pm doc. My question is what steps can I take to get treated again? Will anyone ever prescribe pain meds again? I have been on meds for 5 years. I also have X-rays and MRI's of my spine and torn rotator cuff. I know I did this and he had a right to fire me, just please can someone give me steps to take to even get in front of another pain doc;( I cannot function in life without the meds. I am also on disability. I have no quality of life without the meds, that's why I took them to begin with in Tulsa and before I got in to his office. I live in Oklahoma, I am a 42 year old female. Please, anyone?!? I am so afraid and sick to my stomach I cannot function. When a pm doc gets records from all docs including him, there will bee that firing letter and I can't even get in to explain;(. Can someone please help answer soon, I'm so sick and afraid. Please, other than I did it to myself and oh well!! I truly get that...thank you.

[BetterGetBetter]

QUOTE: "Ok, I took my husbands morphine before I went to see him."

Here's some different points of view. Just some things to think about. Maybe some apply, maybe none apply.

1.) Pretend that you are the Pain Management Doctor. Put yourself in his shoes for a minute.

2.) Ever consider it to be a blessing that you may never be allowed Big Dog Hard Pill Drugs again?

3.) Go to a brand new doctor and say "You know what? Controlled substances and me just do not mix. Are there some safe, effective medications that you can prescribe that are NOT controlled substances?"

You said "I have no quality of life without the meds." Is that really, really true?

[BetterGetBetter]

p.s. I feel really bad for you that you hurt a lot. I'm sorry to hear that your very first post on the internet or a forum is about the suffering you are feeling. But hopefully you read my earlier post, and there's stuff to think about. I thought of one more thing to add: On one hand, you feel "cut off" when your doctors say "nope, no more controlled substances," but on the other hand, if you really DO get "cut off," imagine the amazing freedom you are going to feel not having to jump through all those hoops for that kind of medicine. You may even find there are other treatments that work better than pills.

[Carmalon]

Thank you for responding to my post! I would like you to know how much I appreciated it.  I HATE relying on the pain medication!  Do I have enough to make it to go here, do I have enough todo this, etc...However, I would like to say a few things.  First, when I took my husbands medication  the first time I was not on a contract with anyone and I was between doctors.  My husband knows my pain and offered it to me. I did not " take" it without his knowledge and secondly, I took it only because of an unexpected  issue that arose...I did not plan on an overnight trip, as we were only suppose tone gone a short time that turned out to be over night.  I would not go without my meds overnight on purpose, I was just lucky his back was bothering him and he stuck a couple in his pocket. I was overnight without my meds! I was really hurting with the stress from worrying about our loved one at hospital and not having meds, etc...I would NOT jeopardize my pm unless I was hurting bad!! Looking back, yes dumb and I regret it, but things happen!  I was honest about the anxiety med. I thought that's what I was suppose to do was tell him if I needed more if what I had wasn't working.  I have even given him scripts to shred that have been given to me by the ER...I'm in the hospital a lot with my Lupus. I was just in for 3 days last week. Anyway, to answer your question, YES I am sure I need the medication and apparently so does my PCP because he is taking over my pm until a new ppm will accept me. I hate having to worry about it every month! Yes, it would be better not to need it, but I do.  I don't mean to come across harsh, but these things that happened to me I did not tell the pmp about is because YOU CANT BE HONEST WITHOUT REPERCUSSIONS!!! After I was told I had a strike for the Xanax, I wasn't about to tell him about the Tulsa trip!!! If pain patients could be honest with their doctors, maybe things would be all around better for all!!!  In this state it is VERY STRICT!!!  Those of you that can be honest with your pmp, well that's great, but tried that here and it wasn't nicely received!  I am waiting, praying, hoping, and YES, learned a very valuable lesson! Follow these contracts to a T, but jeez, the DEA needs to let up on pm patients and the doctors! They will never win the war on drugs! Never have and never will!  I'm sorry, but all they are doing is making it worse!  If a fired cpp can't get another doctor to help, they will run somewhere, somehow and get them from someone if it means their quality of life! In turn, this creates diversion! Ok, I'll stop rambling...just sooo thankful my pcp knows my pain, believes me and has been willing to help me! At least for now! The Government is in everyone's business too much, including the doctors! America is a different America now... Thank you for allowing me to vent!

[Carmalon]

When I said Government is in patients business too much, even the doctors...I meant the government  should ease up on our doctors as well. Let them practice their job!! They went to school for it! My doctor knows me and my condition, not the DEA!

[philnoir]

Write your elected officials in congress and tell your story.

Write the president -- he's the boss of DEA.

There are millions of pain patients. When we organize and let washington know what they are doing to us (and what we will do to them because of it), they will wake up.

This is an election year -- find out which candidates are hip on pain and what pain patients are going through -- vote the chronic pain ticket.

[remar]

I've thought about writing letters myself but feel like it will accomplish nothing. The government is going to do what it wants to do. I'm sure I'll change my mind and write letters and sign any petitions I can. This is so ridiculous that we as patients have to suffer. We pay are Drs very well, we trust them, we have a relationship with them and yet they don't even have any control as far as treating our pain. Not much control anyway because they're so afraid.
How terrible that many of us have to go to pain clinics and be under a microscope all the time. I'm getting ready to see a pain management Dr myself and I'm so scared that she will reject me and I'll have no other place to turn to for my chronic pain.
To the original poster. See your GP and tell them your situation. They might be able to help you find another pain Dr or clinic very soon. People slip up. I know you were in terrible pain while you were away from home and that's why you took one of your husbands pain pills. Before, your Dr would have understood this but things have drastically changed in the last few months. I'm so sorry for what you're going through. My sister has RA, fibro, heart problems, bulging discs and other medical problems. She's so scared her RA Dr will take her off of her meds and she can not even begin to function without them. She's disabled too.
Great advice as always Philnoir.

[remar]

This does have to do with the government doesn't it? I've learned so very much since I joined this forum and from I have learned, it is the government and the DEA that made these new laws and changed pain medications from class 3 or 4 to class 2.
I've already signed a few petitions. I look for them all the time. Please correct me if I'm wrong about the government being involved. I'm still learning about all of this. We, as pain patients, have to do something. This is completely out of control. People are getting "fired" left and right from their pain Drs and pain clinics. Or, Drs will not even take on new patients. People are suffering needlessly and it's just not right. Pain patients do need to know that they can sign petitions and write letters.
I sent you a PM fntn. I hope you got it. I was wondering how your tests went. I hope to hear from you soon.