Scared to get off morphine ER

[DoxieDiggity]

I'll begin by telling you all I suffer from c5 and c4 nerve damage that causes pain on my left side as well as tendonitis in all my joints up my left arm from fingers to shoulder. I was on perscription sleeping pills for an enormous chunk of my childhood, and had horrible experiences with them. Because of this I really, really hate drugs. However, after nearly a year of chronic pain that nearly drove me to suicide, when the only treatment option I was allowed that was left was pain management, the doctor convinced me to try dilaudid 2-4mg a day. Even though I looked into it, and it scared me, such low dosages didn't seem so bad. He quickly had me up to 8mg and then moved me to 30mg ER morphine because the dilaudid wasn't lasting for anything. I always built a very quick tolerance to my drugs, so I guess I didn't think about it. After all, it was actually doing something for the pain and not making me violently ill for days like percoset or loratab. After I had an epideral for my nerve pain, my doctor started perscribing me less morphine and wants to start me on sleeping pills so I sleep through the night (my tendonitis wakes me up in tears) I'll be honest I am terrified of getting on sleeping pills, I don't want to take them. But I don't want to take less morphine either. I don't think i'm addicted b/c I haven't had to increase my dosage, it's not making me sick, and I'm scared to get off them again because of pain. The same reason the Dr perscribed to me. Can anyone relate to this? Not wanting to take the drugs but scared to get off because of the pain? I fear I will run out of medication and not be able to get more. My therapist also told me they'd have to put me on methadone to get me off the morphine. is this true? why wouldn't my doctor have told me that when he started me on this?????

[Mollyrae]

It always amazes me when a Doctor wants to change what is working. He coxed you into taking these drugs for your pain and now that your comfortable..bam, wants to change the ball game.

As another member said, you need to explain to him that your treatment is working and finally lets you live life. I'm sure the Doctor is aware of your childhood and the sleeping pills, so to want to re-indroduce you to them is crazy.

Have that chat with him and explain to him that you'll be back at square one if he pulls the Morphine.

My best,
Mollyrae

[sandee1818]

I am checking in to see how your doing.
Have you seen your doctor since your post?
We are here for you and will help any way we can:)

[BP88]

Explain to your doctor that the medication is helping you and you don't want to come off because your pain will return.  Make it sound like he's taking you back to stage one in terms of your pain.

[mellie4]

You have to understand there's a difference between addiction and tolerance/dependence.  I found this hard to sort out myself.  I'm always afraid of addiction and hate taking my pills.  But like you I'm afraid of the pain.  And truthfully, I'm afraid of withdrawals if I go off the oxycodone.

My Pain Clinic nurse practitioner keeps assuring me that I won't experience any withdrawals, that they can take care of it, but I'm not so sure.  And she keeps reiterating that I am not addicted but dependent.  I depend on the medication in order to function.

At this point, they're talking about putting me on a long-acting medication since I'm on such a high dose of the oxycodone.  But I'm really afraid of all of them.  She said my options would be MS Contin, oxycontin, a Fentanyl patch, or methadone.  I told her I'm just not comfortable with this.  

Part of me is afraid it won't work.  (After my last surgery in March they gave me high doses of Dilaudid and it didn't even work as well as ibuprofen for me.)  The Fentanyl patch scares me because I think it would be hard to come off.  Same with the morphine.  The methadone, though, I think is what scares me the most.

Right now we've tweaked some of the medications and added a new compounding gel.  I need to make some decisions by my next appointment, though.

I've found sleep to be so important when you have pain.  I'm much better able to deal with everything if I get a decent night's sleep.  (I'm not even looking for an 8-hour sleep.  I'd be happy with 5 hours unbroken sleep.)  I've taken Ambien and haven't had a problem with it.   I never worried about tolerance to that, though maybe I should.  I was worried that it would knock me out so much that I wouldn't hear my kids (they were little when I first tried it.)  But it didn't work that way for me.  If one of them cried out in their sleep, I'd still wake up.  Even know, if I take one and the kids are being loud or something, it will wake me (now that they're older, they stay up much later than I do!)

I still remember the first night I took the Ambien.  I had such a fantastic night's sleep, and I remember thinking, "Wow.  This is what it feels like to have a good night's sleep."   I was truly amazed at how good I felt.

I think I do have a tolerance to Ambien.  It doesn't kick in quite as quickly as it used to.  If you didn't want to do Ambien, there are other things to help you sleep.  Other prescription medications but also over-the-counter medications like AdvilPM.  I don't find that to be the best but it does help a little.  Of course there's always the old standby, warm milk!  Sometimes I find the old-fashioned remedies really do help!  Or that sleepy time tea or other teas (I've never tried those.)

You could try some meditation for sleep, too.  I'm really a big fan of sleep.  I think it's underrated by our society in general.

Good luck with whatever you decide.  I find making decisions to be very difficult in this situation.  Treating chronic pain and making decisions on procedures, medications and other things I find is one of the more difficult aspects of dealing with pain.

[jamlws]

If you have been on the morphine for awhile you might need something else to take when you get off of it so you don't withdrawl, it isn't that your addicted to it but that your body is use to the drug and when it is gone you will go through withdrawl. Everyone is different but I was on morphine for 2 weeks and quit taking it cause it didn't help me at all. A few days after I quit it I was in so much pain from head to toe, I thought my kidneys shut down or something bad has happen to my body I went to the ER cause I was crying so much in pain. They said it was from stopping the morphine, I was shocked to say the least. so they gave me another pain med not as strong to get me through the withdrawls. So I would talk to your dr about it. And tell him how you feel about getting off the meds that help you so much. I can't take sleeping pills and won't cause I have to be awake if my kids was to wake me up at night which happens way to much lol.
Good luck to you,
Jamie

[Sarajmt]

Yikes!  I'm so sorry you're in this situation.  I'm sure someone else will come on later who can give you a better answer.  

But speaking for myself, I don't like having to take my meds either.  But it sure beats the alternative.  I'll be on them my entire life.  I wish a better alternative were available but it's not.

For now, maybe you should talk to your doctor about your concerns and any alternatives.  Not a great answer but maybe someone else can give you a better one.

Good luck.