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Avatar universal

11 year old daughter thinks she's fat, what should I do?

Yesterday, I took my 11 year old daughter to the doctor. When they weighed her, she was 120 pounds. Her face turned red and she tried to act like she didn't see it. When the doctors was done and we were in the car, she asked me, "Am I fat?I think I weigh too much. Is it fine or no?" I tried to make her feel better by telling her "You're not fat, you're fine, you weigh perfectly normal." But, she's been saying she thinks she's fat and wants to lose weight and I recently saw her writing in her journal. She said she's fat and wants to lose weight but nobody motivates her or supports her so she shouldn't even try to lose weight. I don't know what to do to help her. Should I help her lose weight, tell her she doesn't need to lose weight, etc? Plz help me I really want to be a good mom and help her!
2 Responses
Avatar universal
You don't say how tall she is.  Is she overweight?  Because if she is, you're the parent, you determine the diet she eats.  
3 Comments
I completely agree with this.  Sometimes,  11 year old girls are adult height,  so she would be a healthy weight.  You know how to figure this out,  Dahnah.  Is she overweight or not?
She is 5 foot
Well,  then yes,  she's a little heavy.  Some girls in adolescence get a little heavy and then stretch back out as they mature and slim down.  Is she eating healthy foods,  healthy amounts,  and remaining physically active?
19674156 tn?1482256929
As good parents we never want to hurt our little ones. Not emotionally or physically.  We do however want them healthy and we are the ones to teach them. Its called the joys of parenting. A child her age wants a honest opinion not to be lied to. You want her to grow up and tell you the truth correct?
So you can explain number one... everyone is different because it would be really boring if we were all the same. What if we were like cut outs of cookies. Yawn!!! How crazy boring it would be if the guy or girl you married looked just like you, and your children looked just like you? Your neighbors all looked just like you. Explain that We all have or own uniqueness.
Then the issues with..How does your child feel about her self? Is she a good person does she feel that she is over weight? (if she is asking she has already formed an opinion of herself.) Unless medical issues are there. She still has real hope.  If she feels to big, she can tweek a few things herself. Im sure her doctor can have her see a nutritionist. Its not about starve yourself that is a horrible idea. Its good she is asking you at this age so she can learn the right ways to be a healthy adult in life. A nutritionist can guide her on healthy food choices. A healthy life style is whats important to understand.  And as a parent it’s your job to help her be the best, happy, healthy, good person to others that she can be. Teach her to respect herself and what respect is.  A healthy self awareness and image is not thinking, “NO matter what I am the greatest gift to this earth.” nor is a healthy self image locking up and not wanting to see anyone. A child is not dumb. Just because they are young. It is wonderful that she asked you now when you can lead her on the best paths. It is not a easy life style to live at first, especially if you are not use to it. But it is the most rewarding.  I believe that our diet and eating habits are one of the most pasted down traditions. I am a first generation healthy eater. I am also one who felt uncomfortable in my own skin when I was young. I was one who never had the correct teachings at a young age. I am however the one who made plenty of mistakes and almost died in the process. I wish one of my parents had told me there is hope. Now I am older and I am also the only one in my family with no heart issues or cancer or diabetes. I can still keep up with the kids and enjoy life of activity and excitement. It takes about two years to really get on the right track with total dedication. Shopping and eating out and drinks and what have you. ITs like reprograming generations of teachings. I can’t wait to live to be 100.  
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