8 Yr. old w/ behavioral issues

[LisaMoon]

My only child is a 8yr. old boy. I'm a single mother and my son only visits with his father about 2 days out of the month. He generally obeys my orders at home and listens when I speak to him. However, he just began the third grade on August 25th, and I've already had to attend 2 parent/teacher conferences related to his behavior, and now his grades are also being affected. He has three teachers, and they all say he's very bright, but he can't seem to sit still or concentrate. They say when he's prompted to do independant work he simply sits there and stares. There's absolutely no complaints about him being disrespectful; actually, they say he's one of the most respectful kids in their classes. And, when they give him instructions, ie: go back to your seat, he follows them, but then two minutes later, he's back to whatever he was doing. I feel helpless and frustrated. I reward him when he does well, and I take away privileges, ie: no tv, to wii, when he does'nt do so well. The counselor placed him on a behavior chart and also promised him prizes if he did well, but that doesn't seem to be helping either. His teachers say he doesn't seem to care that I'm gonna see that chart. The teachers and I have both filled out some behavioral forms which I'm supposed to take to his pediatrician to see if he has ADD, ADHD, or something along those lines, but I'm a little hesitant about having him diagnosed. Any suggestions????

[LisaMoon]

Thanks for your comment. I am aware that my son may or may not have ADHD, and although I wouldn't want to medicade him, if not absolutely necessary, I am not trying to ignore the fact that ADHD may be the problem. I actually took my son to his pediatrician yesterday (I scheduled the appointment last week), and was told he seems to be borderline ADHD, and referred to a Neurologist. So, now I have to wait for that appointment at the end of the month.

[jdtm]

Well, one can't find a solution unless one is aware of the problem.  The first thing that needs to be done is for you to take your son to the pediatrician to see if he has ADD or ADHD.  You are not helpless (as you stated), you just do not want to face something that might not be "favourable".  But your son needs you and you must do this. If he could not see, would you deny him glasses because you are "hesitant about having him diagnosed"?  Besides, it is possible that your son does not have ADD/ADHD and his "problem" might have a very simple solution.