Have a sit-down conversation with him and ask him if he is doing anything hurtful or rude to your boyfriends. Maybe he could also be jealous of you’re relationships (if he’s older).
Any man who can't even pretend to like my kids would be out the door that day.
I know what your going threw I go threw it everyday my self ive been with the same guy for 8 yrs and my son and him cant spend each other they fight like crazy and they do put it on me an I know what your going to threw I'm going to figure out how to take care of the problem my self maybe we can work together and figure it out together.
1) SEND the BF packing
2) send the KId To Boarding school Like Military academy and College at the Military college of his choice (West point,Annapolis, Colorado)
I'm hoping you will hate this response because that will signal to you that it is right on the mark. This bf conduct is a huge red flag. A man acting like a petulant child should raise the alarm with respect to what sort of partner you are willing to be with. If your son was not there, you can be guaranteed that the bf would hate your daughter. If neither of them were there, your relationship would reveal itself swiftly. Children are never the problem; they just bring our attentions to it. Manipulators and gaslighters always have a blame target and he's chosen your son. And you've chosen to be with someone (several by the sounds of it) who has the emotional self-regulation of a child. They are fighting each other over you; that's what children do when parents have weak boundaries. As a parent, your primary responsibility is to your son and he obviously needs your time and attention. I left my relationship to protect my child and until they are 18 and launched into the world, and for the rest of their life, I won't take anyone else's side. Ever.