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21/2 yr cries to go to the day care - need help

Hi,
i have a twins of which one a boy and one girl. They are now 21/2 yrs , all along they have been at home either with me or my mom- in law. Now that my in- laws had to move to an other state and that I have started working recently, they go to a day care center. My son is very naughty, I used to tell him if he behaves ill then I'll put him to a bording school....would that have caused a adverse effect on him, he cries every morning that he does'nt wants to go to the day care. Even when he is back home at night, he hugs and hold me tight when he sleeps and he blabers in the sleep saying mum don't go....I am worried, his behaviour has moved me a lot...How should I explain to him that he needs to be there in the day care and thats not a place of punishment, it is just that he needs to be there till mum comes back from work to pick him up from there. My daughter is fine.
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Avatar universal
used to tell him if he behaves ill then I'll put him to a bording school....would that have caused a adverse effect on him  --  your words

Probably not.  I suspect your son is suffering from separation anxiety which is a very common issue with young children.  There is lots and lots of information on the internet - I might suggest you google phrases as "toddlers and anxiety" or "separation anxiety and young children" or similar words/phrases to find information about this issue.  I suspect it will resolve itself in time; however, do note that it may take months or even a year or more.  The key is often patience, understanding and quietness in your approach to his screaming and crying (easy to say, hard to do).  If there still is an issue in a year or so, then you may require further advice/help from your son's pediatrician.  Hope this helps ....
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Avatar universal
Thanks , Thanks a ton....may be ur true...but the reason I did not feel it could be separation anxiety is because he used to stay without mom or dad at home....with whomsoever we may leave him with . He used to feel secured....his grandparents, neighbours....friends....But with the day care ....the story is different, this is not is what I had expected, infact the caretake is a very good lady and over and above my children gel with anyone whom they meet at first also. Will definetly do a study on the separation anxiety
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Avatar universal
He used to feel secured....his grandparents, neighbours....friends....But with the day care ....the story is different -- your words

This is exactly what anxiety is - feeling "unsafe in an environment" which everyone else knows is "safe".  Your son felt "safe" in your home; he does not at school.  By the way, two-year old boys can be a handful (we have a two-year old grandson who is also a "handful") - I think it is partially because boys tend not to be able to use language as easily or quickly as girls and so they display their frustrations through behaviour (which usually is not a pretty sight).  In the past couple of months our grandson has begun to speak more and make his wishes known, thus we have seen less "naughty" behaviour.  I suspect the same will be true in your son's case.  One more thing - would your son feel better if he carried something of yours while at school (a picture or scarf or something) - sometimes this helps to alleviate worries and stress.  Also, it helps if you don't talk about the issue too much - by making "going to school" the ordinary thing it may seem less scary.  Just a thought ....
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Avatar universal
Thanks ,
Thanks a ton once again, May it was me who was overreacting the situation...he was better this morning...I spoke to him, made him listen to me that , I was not too far and that I would return back to take him in just as much as 7-8 hrs.... in the meanwhile I told him what he would be doing in th day care and how the care take would be to him....I also promised him some candy in the evening. I think I can mange him a little better now. I too am feeling good today as both my kids waved me a bye without crying much, yes I could see a little in their eyes but I think as days pass this would also change.

Thanks , Thanks once again.

I have a post in the head &turmatic brain injury...if u can just check and let me know if I get an answer to that Q...I have been waiting for someone to address my issue.
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