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4 yr old misbehaving at pre-school, defiant and rude.

My son is 4, he's very able, he hasn't yet started school but he can already read and write simple words, count to 100 and do basic sums, he is very articulate. HOWEVER, his behavior leaves A LOT to be desired. Today is the third day in a row where i have been to collect him and his pre-school room leader has had to inform me that he has been rude to staff, shouted at them, stamped his feet when he hasn't got his own way, lied about his behavior. He even had to be taken to sit in the managers office today to have a 'chat.' He interacts well with other kids but seems to have a massive issue with authority. At home we have a reward system where he goes up for good behavior and down for bad behavior, he is entirely aware of what is right and wrong/ good and bad, but he chooses to behave badly. He escalates situations with screaming when hes told off, he hates being put on the naughty step. I am very firm with him at home, as a teacher I deal with badly behaved kids all day long, but he just doesn't seem to care. I am worried because when I asked the room leader if she thought it was 'normal' she said 'Well we do get it from a few of the kids but they usually learn after one or two occasions that they're not getting away with it, he's very persistent.' Any advice or ideas welcome, even if its to say that perhaps I should have him evaluated for something or other.

Thanks, Hari.
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13167 tn?1327194124
Is his father in the home?  Involved Dads are typically able to get the point across that kids don't rule the roost, but it's harder for single moms to instill that respect for authority.
Avatar universal
No, it turned out that he had been hiding a heroin addiction from us for four years so i had to kick him out, I've no doubt this has caused a few of the issues my son has, but it cant account for all of it, and there are kids with much worse, far less stable home lives who still choose good behavior over bad so I'm not sure whats wrong. He does see his father occasionally, but its rare because he cant usually afford the train fare to visit.

Today though, I sent him to nursery with his behavior reward chart and got him to explain the rules to his staff, it seemed to make a big difference so i'm going to keep on with that one.
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13167 tn?1327194124
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