Loss of a classmate

[Natta1980]

My soon-to-be 5 year old son's classmate just passed away. It is truly tragic and I am praying for her and her family. My son always talked about this girl, said that he really liked her, and was always very excited when we ran into her in a grocery store.

At school, they are going to tell all the children that she is at a better place and will not be coming back to school.

He seems to understand a concept of death already, but never experiences a loss of a friend or family. I beleive that he may be too young to attend a funeral. ...Let me know about your experience.

Thank you in advance for your help

[Natta1980]

Thanks for your comments, I will not take him.....I am totally clueless because in 27 years I've managed not to attend any (nobody close to me passed away)....

Thank you again - you comments make lots of sense to me

[margypops]

Too youngto go,  will only worry him if you want to go leave him at home with someone, and make the talk about it light , many children get upset when  family members  die and its usually because they hear a lot of adult talk they dont understand and gives them nightmares. I am so sorry for you and your boy and the Family of this child..Tell him it is all a part of living then let it go.

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I wouldn't take such a young child to a funeral, especially one for a child. They can be very emotional affairs, much more so than when an older adult dies. I don't think he's old enough to understand it all and get closure from it, I think it is more likely to confuse and/or scare him. Just my thoughts. My son's aunt died when my son was 5, I did not want to take him to the funeral and I have not regretted that decision. He knows she died and has his own good memories of her, he does not have any images of people crying or being upset.