Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name, you are mine. When you pass through the waters ... they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you. For I am the Lord your God" (Isaiah 43:1-3).
But he told me: "My kindness is all you need. My power is strongest when you are weak." So I will brag even more about my weaknesses in order that Christ's power will live in me. Therefore, I accept weakness, mistreatment, hardship, persecution, and difficulties suffered for Christ. It's clear that when I'm weak, I'm strong. (2 Corinthians 12.-9-10)
I believe that God understands when we are weak and forgives us for that. He made us human with all of our faults. The desire to be close to God shows him that you are a faithful person. I will pray that you feel his power and become strong in your faith again. Peace and blessings for you.
sounds like your faith is more than a mustard seed! - which is all he requires - god bless, brother
Life is a journey of trials and tribulations, but if you stay faithful God will alway give you inner strenght that you didn't realize you have to overcome all life's obsticles. Stay strong in faith and prayer and one day you will stand before him and he will say, "Good job my faithful servant." Judy
Also, just take some time to reflect, pray and realize that with God in your life, your burden will be lightened.