Confused on when to start trying again.

[rghkah38]

I just had a baby girl in July.  I am 35 and my husband is 40.  It took us many years of trying. We even went through a lot of iui's and 8 ivfs.  I told my husband I want to wait at least a  year before trying again because I am breastfeeding.  He wanted to try sooner because it took us a long time and of our ages, but he willing to wait for me even though he doesn't agree.  I keep on questioning it because it did take a long time and we are older.  When is a good time to start again and to stop breastfeeding?  I know it's up to us, but I feel like I'm being selfish.

[kellym]

If you aren't sure that you even would like another child yet, I would say continue to nurse. Your baby is #1 now and your feelings may change over the next couple of months being a mother.  Some people only want one child and there is nothing at all wrong with that! Enjoy your little bundle, you will figure out your feelings :)

[Birds71]

I nursed my daugher for 13 months and after reading about weaning, I followed a very conservative time-frame of eliminating each feeding.  In the end, i think it's almost more difficult for the mom than it is the baby!  of course, each baby is different, but she was completely fine.

That said, it is totally up to you.  But if you know you want another one and there may be circumstances that make getting pregnant more difficult, you may want to start pretty soon.  Get a game plan in place that both you and your husband can agree and then maybe you'll feel more comfortable about it.  And maybe there is something you can take while still breastfeeding?  Not sure about that one, but I'm sure your Dr will be able to share some options.

Good luck to you!!

[rghkah38]

I can't get pregnant natually because my tubes were taken out.  So, the problem is that I can't breastfeed while on hormone medication.  M husband is worried that is might take us a long time to get pregnant again.  I just keep on going  back and forth with this.  i do know that I defintly want another child.

[adgal]

HI there, and congrats on your little girl!  I don't think anyone can really answer that question, it's such a personal thing.  I had a baby boy in January and I am trying now.  I am 41 and don't want to wait any longer.  I know it will be a bit tougher having an infant with a still young baby, but I do feel I am up for it, and my husband does too.  I can tell you that I do not think you are being selfish at all.  Lots of people have their children close together, and some think it's preferable.  Others prefer to space them out a bit.  There is no right or wrong here.

Also, you don't necessarily have to stop breastfeeding.  Talk to your Dr.  There are options to jump start ovulation without having to quit nursing.  Lot's of women breastfeed both babies...not uncommon at all.

Good luck to you on whatever you decide!

Oh, and just to let you know...there is no scientific basis for this, but it does seem many women get pregnant much easier the second time.  I am thinking of one girlfriend of mine in particular...her and her husband tried for years. Finally IVF gave them a beautiful set of boy/girl twins.  Less then a year later she found herself pregnant again naturally and a perfect little baby boy was added to the family!