I am 41 and learned today that I am pregnant. At the same time, I am being told that my level is very low (16). That is a sign that I am either miscarring and/or etopic pregnancy. I am having mild cramping and have to shared. I am very upset because my husband and I are trying very hard to have a child of our own. I feel like I am the problem due to my age.
Any suggestions for me anyone.
Hun, I feel for you, god only knows because this gift comes from him, like you, I myself want so badly to have a child, but I was told of issues standing in my way.
You probably heard quite awhile back that a 68 yr old woman concieved a baby for her daughter who couldnt have children, so what do you make of that?
One of my sister's shattered my dream and said, think about your age, think about your health, think about your weight. Ok I know I'm over weight, but so was my older sister, her last child weighed 11lbs-2oz's, where my sister I'm speaking of is slim and had normal birth's.
The sister I talked to about this was 40 yrs old and had her last baby of normal weight, so what says that you and I cant have that too.
I hate when you test to see if your pregnant any time of day, ok about 15 min's ago I tested to see and it showed negative, so I will wait for tomorrow morning and I will test again.
I had sex with my husband Jan 26th, wait 2 weeks after which come tomorrow it will be 12 days. That's what I was told to do, I guess I'm just anxious to know the results.
I had light bleeding, one day only, I also had really medium pain/cramps but get this Neat_1 - I had really bad pain in my left arm and wrist. I would say the pain that occurred there was out of the ordinary, so like you mentioned in your post here, could this be an etopic pregnancy?
Why? because I read what the signs are and I'm wondering wtf?
Hi..ectpoic don't show up that early with pain...usually pain doesn't occur til you are at 6-7 wks but it s is something to be aware of..the pain will be left or right if it indeed travels up your neck and shoulder that means you have already ruptured a tube and again that could not happen in an early pregnnacy because it is just not large enough to rupture a tube..Secondly, age does play a factor in concieving but more and more woman of age are having healthy natural children so 45 or 41 is definitely not too old.. the best and only way to truly tell if you are pregnant is a blood test but usually we all see that positive home test first which does indeed take 10-12 days after conception to shwo a BFP-Big Fat Positive...they are in the habit of running a quantitative HCg level if you are older than 40 or have miscarried before so they can start charting numbers from the beginning, again 16 is not a bad number if it is your first and taken 10-12 days after coneception...the real key will be to see if it doubles...there is so much to read and so much that is scary but take heed that every pregnancy no matter how long it last is indeed a miracle and worthy of celebration ..sometimes fear will inhibit that possibility...so take caution, be informed but enjoy your pregnancy...it is the most beautiful experience you will ever have...Neat_1 Congratulations...APACJI, I hope you get your positive result soon and the pain dissipates soon..Hope this helped a little bit and welcome...! The best thing you can do for any pregnancy is to have faith and try and stay positive...hard to do but not impossible.:)
Yes it is possible! I am 50 and conceived naturally. 16w4d
OMG, 50 WOW, so was that great news for you, because so many women fear their babies turn out to have disabilities and such . . .because of the age we are.
I talked to my husband again this evening and I said, dont tell your mom just yet, because I want to make sure, then I said . . .so how does it feel to be a Papa if it turns out that I am, he said old. I'm like what, you told me back in November that it would be great news for the both of us if I am and that your Mom would be so happy for us as my mother has dementia and she would be too.
So I guess its the thought of it and then I guess he will change when the baby gets here.
I'm scared and excited all at once, scared and not sure if I am and then that goes away and the excited part flows in. Because back in the end of November begining of Dec07 we tried and this was 2 days before my period showed up and then we were fooling around 2 weeks ago and now it's wait and see.
I guess my sister is trying to say "What if . . .
She also told me tonight that my niece is getting married in Dec 08 in Jamaica, yes this I do know, because I thought it was 2009 and not this year-shitt and if I'm preggy's, the baby is due in November08 (just guessing)?
Hunny, there is so much (SO MUUUUCH) more to conceiving than just count days.....
Unfortunately people judge (about age) and don't make things any easier! I feel for you..., i had losses and infertility before, and thought my world was just collapsing... so I learned how my body works.
You need to (first of) have normal periods, wether they are 28 or 35 days or whatever, but you need to know when you get them and how long your cycle is. Then, you need to know and pinpoint your ovulation day. You CAN'T just rely on 'counting 2 weeks'.... cuz nobody is the same. Even different cycles, it might vary what day you ovulate.
You need to buy an ovulation kit at the pharmacy (i recommend the answer brand that has 21 tests) and pretty much take a test everyday. Read the instructions there, pretty much when the test line gets darker than the other line, means you are ABOUT to ovulate which is the best time to make love! before you ovulate not after.
You need (if you want) to take your temperatures every morning and make a chart (go to fertilityfriend.com to download one) and write down your temps, if you pinpoint the day before you O (with the kit) and a day or two after, you have a temperature raise of three constant days, it means you ovulated....
See? it's more complicated than just that. I also heard of people conceiving at your age, but some can't.... some have conceived at your age thru IVF (one of my BESTEST-EST friends here did! 40smama) and now they are about to be mommies! so you might wanna consider seeing a fertility specialist now... before time keeps running.
I am sorry you're having such a hard time!!! we have all gone thru that at one point sweetie! just don't give up hope and inform yourself!!!! =)
Best of lucks!!!!
Thanks for the heads up, I guess when you really look at it, you kinda wonder about things. I read it takes 6 days for conception to happen, and then I saw it said something else, so I kinda wonder what's going on?
I told my husband that he's got cold feet, because he says, he's to old, hell he's not the one here if I am just by mere coincidence that can just whip it out and say ok, we dont want this and perhaps its just gas that I'm feeling right now.
I really dislike the waiting game, because if my FSH test and LH come back and says nope your not, then I would say, what the heck is this weird feeling down below. It's not a good feeling, perhaps somethng's wrong, and now the only way to find out is to just wait.
Wish there was a way that we can do the same and get the results now, or in like 24 hrs insted of waiting for a lab to spit it out.
I've got cramps right now, that I know darn well it's gas related and I have IBS, last week I've been going through changes from the runs to constipation and plenty of gas.
So if what I'm experiencing is simply this, then I guess for my darling husband, he'll be so happy, because he's to old, got cold feet and lied to me that we should have a child, so his mother and mine can be so proud that his seed got me there and now he's backing out.
I willl certainly try that kit you mentioned, I saw it there yesterday when I was buying the pregnancy test kit.
I tested about 15 min's ago, and it being 99.99%, there are only lines, no plus's, so should I say; whew what a relief, ok its to soon to tell.
Perhaps I should leave my husband to wondering a little longer or perhaps scare him and say, Hello Papa John, so what do you think we should name the little gaffer? lmao
If it's a boy, Ethan John, if it's a girl, Sara Catherine, John after Daddy, Sara after the great grandmother (mine).
Because it's his seed, he'll think that they should be named after his family, because I remember a friend of mine, whose husband was very modest like this. I really felt for her and we sat down to look at names of what she liked, that's when her husband came home and he said how was our day, we said great, he said what ya got there and she said a baby name book, so he wants to see it and, so she gave it to him.
Next thing we know he ripped it in half and said the names have already been picked out, so I looked at my friend and she's in shock because she knew darn well they hadnt been.
If it's a boy the name was going to be Robert Allan, Robert after his Dad, and Allen was Susan's husband's first name. If it were a girl, it was going to be Emily Rose, Emily after a great Aunt that he truly loved and Rose after his mother's name.
So I said, excuse me here Allan but you and her are supposed to sit down and share the names from both familes, he said, It's MY SEED, I will name them and then he left and went out the back door.
Anyway Susan got an abortion and then she left him, he was just to controlling, to this day I hope Susan got away from him, because Allan showed up at my door and continued to harasse me, as to her whereabouts.
She never told me where she went, because I didnt want to know, he continued for 1 week parked out front of my apt building, waiting to see if she was there with me, calling the police didnt help, they cant do a thing unless he was trying to kill me, then they could step in and arrest him, so he wasnt breaking any laws.
It's really sad when you hear of things like this and it makes you wonder, 2 yrs later I got this postcard from Florida, she married a man who was not possesive like he was (allan), he was a florida state trooper and they have one child, his from his failed marriage and she was expecting and was due in a couple of weeks.
I cried because I was so happy for her, because when I first met Susan, Allan was abusing her, he never allowed her to go out shopping, he had to be there watching her the whole time, thats when I met her. I guess Allan trusted me, so we went shopping and did things together.
I just hope if there are any women out there who read this, you're not alone. Susan had no money to live on, she left Canada and entered the USA for a better life. I dont know if she had a dual membership or what, but she's got a better life now.
I feel every bit you're talking about, including the cramping. I just turned 35 on my last b-day which is the day I got pregnant. I have all those fears of being 35 and older. I have had 2 kids already that were normal healthy kids and just pray to God that this one is too. My cramping is caused by the iron pills, constipation. I mean bad *** cramps, just like a period. I hope everything comes out great for you, I know the joys of having your own little bundle of joy.