Aa
Aa
A
A
A
Close
353148 tn?1293061164

He wants another one already!

I'm 21 weeks w/ our first baby together. I have 2 teens from a previous marraige. My husband told me he wants to discuss having another baby after this one is born. I would love to have another child but here is my concern. We went through 5 years of heartache and tears to get where we are now w/ this baby. I lost 2 in the process. Plus, she has to be delivered 3 weeks early via cesarian due to a surgery I had to remove a fibriod a few years ago. Also I am 35 and will be 36 when our little girl is born, and he will be 40. I know lots of women have babies over 40 and everything is just fine, but w/ already having the risk I have I'm not sure if it is the wise thing to do. It makes me so sad to think about not having anymore, and I realy would love to give him more but I'm not sure it's the smart thing to do.
3 Responses
Sort by: Helpful Oldest Newest
216278 tn?1308861082
Well, it's definitely a big decision, but I will tell you that DH and I married later (I was 34 and he was 36).  It took us almost 4 years to get pregnant...I'm just over 20 weeks and 38 years old.  Our baby looks good and healthy so far and we get to see him/her again on Weds.

You are definitely not too old to try for another, but again, it's a very big and personal decisions!

FYI,  we are definitely going to try for another after this one! :)
Helpful - 0
294043 tn?1354207946
Just wait till after your baby arrives and after taking care of a newborn see if he wants more!
:)

Seriously, I would defer this discussion till after the baby is born.  Many people underestimate the responsibility and the time commitment.  Can you handle another baby?  Can you afford another baby?  You can't answer these questions till after the baby arrives.
Helpful - 0
1008869 tn?1283961257
Oh my oh my...what a predicament....but I have to say I am in the same place with my DP, except this is out first, he is 33, I am 41, and I am only 8 weeks, so talks about #2 baffle me!!! Cannot imagine what you are going through..

Men seem to shut out the heartache that both mom goes through (MC's,etc.)...easy enough for them, they move on.  Us women hold onto every second of heartache (of course cause WE are the ones going thru it), we feel it, we breathe it all.  They can **** it all off and look at the end result only, not anything else that went along with it (unless we're talking about the sex part,,,LOL)

I agree with everyone else...let him know it is not "off the table" as of yet but you both need to focus on the healthy and well being of this one.
Helpful - 0
Have an Answer?

You are reading content posted in the Pregnancy 35 and Older Community

Didn't find the answer you were looking for?
Ask a question
Popular Resources
Get information and tips on how to help you choose the right place to deliver your baby.
Get the facts on how twins and multiples are formed and your chance of carrying more than one baby at a time.
Learn about the risks and benefits of circumcision.
What to expect during the first hours after delivery.
Learn about early screening and test options for your pregnancy.
Learn about testing and treatment for GBS bacterium.