I am trying to get pregnant at 42 and I have questions

[Bren02]

Hi there... this is the start of my baby making process.  I had surgery to open my tubes and stared on Clomid and my doctor says all systems are go!  Do I stop drinking coffee and wine right away? how many attempts does it take?? What should I be doing and not doing??????????  any help will be appreciated.  And some happy new from others would be more than welcome.

[PamelaBee]

There are certain posters that are compelled to mention the statistics and complications with miscarriage and chromosome complications to women inquiring to have a baby at an advanced maternal age. I apologize if it made you second guess or question your desire to try again.  It does put a sense of apprehension and doom on the entire process, even before you get started.  Yes, we all know that women TTC over the age of 35 are at risk.  To what degree that is, depends on the woman, her medical history, or reasons beyond our control.  All women are different, some have miscarriage after miscarriage, some have one, some none.  It's all out of our control, and when it does happen, it's natures way of ending an unviable pregnancy, so you can't put the blame on yourself.  But, that doesn't mean there are not more of your healthy quality eggs ready to be fertilized and develop into a healthy, viable pregnancy.  Please continue to try, do not let scary statistics stand in your way....you can do this!  Pls keep us posted.  Pam

[7preg3b]

well I'm TTC at age 38..  I have four beautiful children and am finding myself wanting another..  we will ttc until July and then stop if not pregnant yet..  I don;t want to raise kids all of my life...  I have a 17 year old too..  good luck on TTC..   I just tell myself age is just a myth..  

[Bren02]

Thank you for the positive feedback.  It's nice to hear that you had a child in your 40's a second one on the way!  It makes me trust that it can and will happen.  I got married last year.  I could have had a baby at any point in my life but I waited until the time was right to be fair to myself and a little one.  I am very excited about the process!  And it helps to find a group that understands what this is like.

Thanks to all of you for your feedback.

[natalie910]

To PamalaBee, thank you so much for your wise words. I feel much better about it now. We really do want another child. I did see a new ob/gyn today and he gave me a lot of hope, too. He really answered all of my questions and gave us the go ahead to ttc again. I have to wait for 2 cycles but I'm ok with that.
Thanks again for being so positive!

[SoCalTricia]

I second everything Pam said. Sometimes I think people (naturally) allow their own experiences to color their opinion. If you've had a hard time conceiving and/or have had miscarriages, you tend to think it is more common. If you *didn't have a hard time, then you might think it's easy. Either way, statistics can be frightening if you allow them to get to you. I'm almost 41 and got pregnant very easily...the second month trying. I'm almost 18 weeks now, and everything looks great. I've had a fairly easy pregnancy so far. As for miscarriages...Natalie, if you've had just one, sometimes it is just an anomoly. No one knows why it happened, and if there's no pattern of miscarriage, chances are you won't have another one. Anyway...I hope both of you don't get discouraged. I'm keeping you in my thoughts, and send lots of sticky baby dust to you! Please keep us updated...

Tricia

[Miranda9]

Hello,

I agree with Tricia.  We all tend to speak from our own experience.

I'm your age and I certainly believe you can get pregnant!  

I've never had any trouble conceiving naturally....but I have had three miscarriages.  I've just found out that I have anticardiolipin antibodies that may have contributed to these losses.  My twin sister is currently pregnant with her second child and she is doing great!  

What should you be doing?  Eat healthy.  Take your folic acid supplements.  Try to cut down on your coffee and wine now...to make it easier when you want to eliminate.  

The obvious thing is to have sex right before you ovulate.  Are you tracking your cycle with bloodwork and u/s or by BBT?  

Don't use lubrication when you have sex...apparently it hinders the sperm mobility!

Good luck and I'm with you on this journey,
M