second trimester labor

[Luckejem]

I am 37 years old and recently lost my son at 18 weeks due to my water breaking. I have been told that I have certain issues such as PCOS and that I would have difficulty getting pregnant, but sure enough, after 3 months we got pregnant only to go into early labor and have my son slowly die as I lost all of my amnoitic fluid. All my medical care was fine and all tests conducted came out fine and negative. The doctors could not tell us what went wrong, giving us alot of "maybe's and "could be's" but no definite answer. I have two healthy older children and don't understand why this happened.   I am lost and empty, can anyone help or have experienced the same thing. We want to try again but I am so scared that I will loose the baby again.   I cannot bare the thought of loosing another baby.  

[khadjia]

I am not sure what an RE is could u explain that so me. Thank you for your king words

[FaithNHim]

Hi,

I am soory to hear about your loss. I have not personally experienced this but I want yu to know I am here to support you in any way possible as so many women here would be willing to do the same.

Has the RE informed you of any possibilities as of yet?

-Keeping you in my thoughts and prayer


Erakall

[khadjia]

Member's Question

2 second trimester losses premature ruptured membranes
by khadjia


  


khadjia
Female, 31 years
long island city - NY
Member since Feb 2008
Journal Entry:   "I currently have 2 children out of 11 pre..." [Read]
  




I currently have 2 childern out of 11 pregnancys. i have always had a cervical cerclage put in place at 14wks. My son was born full term and my daughter was born at 6 months 2 pounds and 6 ounces she i now 9 adnd doing great.. Anyway my husband and i have been trying to become pregnant again. In 2007 i had another miscarriage due to premature ruptured membranes at 19 wks.After my cerclage was put in place i was passing large blood clots and had a foul smell. In 2008 i was so happy to be pregnant again. I just knew that i would not lose this pregnancy the same way i did the year before (boy was i wrong) at 21 wks my water broke again i was so hurt my baby girl lived for 10 min. i am currently seeing a fertility specialist. i told him that around 3to4 months into the pregnancy i get this pressure in my abdominal area. It gets so bad that when i am walking i have to sit down. I dont know what that means but im sure its not good. My question is their anyone out there that has experienced the same thing.And to the experts can i have a viable pregnancy.

                                                                   can anyone relate Is there any hope for
                                                                      me
                                                                                klove456

[Joyce49788]

i am so sorry for your loss.....i too had a premature rupture of membranes several years ago, i was 20 weeks along and was induced at 22 weeks... i was just barely 18 yrs old, and unlike you, my cervix was not dialated or at least that is what the doctors had told me.  it was difficult for me especially when my father gave me the "this is god's way of punishing you because you didnt go through with the abortion we scheduled for you"...which at times i still believe...sad huh?
i then went to carry 2 babies to term before my next loss in which like mandy38 i actually lost the baby at 16 weeks but didnt know until 20 weeks and then they induced me yet again.  then i carried yet another baby to term and i am now 12 weeks pregnant again, and am very anxious to feel movements.  Both of the babies i lost i did not feel movements at all so usually when i start feeling life i am reassured that everything is gonna be ok.  
you are still young but give your body, mind and heart time to heal.  
i lost baby 1 dec 91 got preg with 2 in sept 93, got preg with 3 april 96 lost baby 4 june 98 got preg with baby 5 sept 01 and got preg with baby 6(current) sept 08

good luck and you are in my thoughts and prayers

[kelliestarr]

I am so sorry for your loss.

[Luckejem]

Thank you, I coud feel your pain as I am currently trying to cope with all this. I was dilated when I got to the hospital, about 4cm but my son was alive to the very end, until he passed through my birth canal.  The not knowing why is what is bothering me. My two children are ages 21 and 18 (had them young) and never thought I would experience something like this, but like you, I feel alone and empty. I just want to ensure that this does not happen again, find ways that my doctor find out what went wrong.  Could they test me for a incompetent cervix? I am so confused and lost as until that  point, everything was fine.
Thank you, and my prayers are with you.

[7preg3b]

Well I too lost my son Cooper at 18 weeks.  IT was horrible.. MY water broke and from there it went downhill.  I was told he would not survive.  He was still alive a few minutes prior to my delivery.  They told me to expect him to come out alive and I would have to hold him as he passed.  I have no answers and have heard many different things.  placental abruption, flimsy cord, listeria (I was really sick two days prior), I felt fine that morning and bam..I am starting to try again.  It has been 6 weeks to the day..  I am in grief counseling, but find myself alone a lot.  This was not a planned pregnancy and I was not over joyed,  but I came to love him with all of me..  It will not make it any easier for the next but the joy of holding your baby will make all the heartache worth it..   I hope this helps.  A cerclage will only help if you m/c due to an incompetant cervix which sounds like was not the problem..  were you dilated at the hospital.  I was not so there fore they knew that was not the problem with me..  let me know if you need to talk I'm on a lot and I'm a good listener..  

[mandy38]

I am so sorry for your loss, having been through it myself, I know what you are feeling.  I lost mine at 20 wks, but the baby had died and 16 wks, unbeknown to me.  I know they can put a stitch in your cervix to stop this happening again, but my main advice is don't rush into it.  We feel like we need a baby straight away after it happens, but you need to give your body and mind time to stabilise and come to terms with what you have been through.  I am pregnant now, which is two years after my loss and your really need that break for your well being, so go slowly and go through the grieving process before you get back on the treadmill again.  good luck with the future!

[adgal]

I am so very sorry for your loss.  I have not experienced anything as horrible as what you did, but have had 4 first trimester m/cs, so I understand about the fear of trying again.  I also have no real explanation as to what keeps happening, but am trying different things to prevent it happening in the future.

I guess you have to just think positive.  You have 2 healthy children so that tells you that chances are it will be ok again in the future.  I think the fear will be there, but you just have to take it day by day, and turn to those you trust for support.  I can tell you this is a great forum for that, we do an awful lot of hand holding around here.  The reality with a loss like this is they don't always know why.  It sounds like the pain is still very fresh.  Be very good to yourself and allow yourself to grieve in the way thats best for you.  I wish you all the best, and we are here if you need someplace to talk.

Take care,

Amanda