Pregnant at 35 & Worried

[Loulou2276]

Hi,

I am 35 and pregnant.  I have been having a hard time getting past the fact that I am automatically considered high risk and honestly freaked out when told all the percentages of increased birth defects etc.

I had 2 children in my late 20's and just had no idea how the odds are stacked against us 35+.

I guess my question is....how have you all come to grips with this data? I am trying to relax, but can't seem to stay calm.

I haven't had any genetic  tests done yet.

Thanks for letting me vent. :)

[adgal]

Jennie, I'm glad you find this forum as positive a place as I do.  And to reassure you a bit...I had what is considered a difficult delivery.  And it still was not bad at all.  In fact, I was so focused on the fact that I was about to meet this long awaited child, that I wasn't thinking all that much about anything else.  And he is here, healthy and I too am just fine.  So even difficult deliveries work out fine.  We are so lucky...we live in a day and age where we have such excellent medical care and excellent monitoring that rarely do things go really wrong.  You'll breeze through it, you'll see.

I truly am not certain why so many in the medical community continue to insist that there are so many challenges with us older moms having kids.  For me, the benefits have far outweighed any risk, and like most women my age who have had babies, I have a healthy and completely typical child.  I can tell you from my years on this board, that is usually the way things turn out around here.

And, if it's any consolation...you are young ones in this forum..lol.  Relax, kick up your heels and enjoy this experience.  It's too wonderful a thing to let someone else wreck it for you!

[Jennie1211]

I know how you feel...I am now 39 and am 14 1/2 weeks along. I've gotten the scary speeches from everyone about my "high risk pregnancy" and "advanced maternal age." I never felt old until I started going through this process. In fact, on my u/s printouts, in the top right corner it always says, "Pregnancy Type: Difficult" just so I won't forget my fate.

In the beginning especially, I spent an inordinate amount of time scavaging websites and stalking forums and just about made myself nuts reading all the horror stories. I finally stopped because I realized I was obsessively comparing other people's NT fold measurements against my own like a crazy person. What good does that do? Like others have said, the chances of anything being wrong are more rare than it sounds. I now stick to more positive forums like this one...that has helped me quite a bit to deal with the anxiety that I think can go along with any pregnancy, maybe even more so when it's your first. I also stay away from those shows on TLC about delivering babies now. They almost always focus on "difficult" deliveries. I'm terrified enough about that whole process as it is....

[stacey10]

I always have the n/s done first though

[stacey10]

I've had an amnio done, and if my risks were high for d/s I would go for the cvs, even tho there is a higher risk of miscarriage, I think it also depends on what you would do with the results if you found that your baby had d/s. I think if you decided that you were able to keep your baby, then amnio would be the way to go, if not then cvs, cause delivering your baby at 20+wks is the worst thing ever to have to go through :(

[adgal]

In addition to Jo's comments, CVS also does carry a slightly higher risk of complications then amnio does.  If I am remembering correctly, cvs has a 1:100 rate of complications while amnio is 1:400.  Personally, I would opt for amnio over cvs if it comes to that again.  Also, I think the key is ensuring you are working with a very experienced Dr.  The Dr. that did my amnio had literally done thousands of them.  He was a perinatologist, and highly highly experienced.  That was really important to me, so if anyone is opting for invasive testing, make sure you do your homework.

[JourneyJoJo]

FYI, CVS is different than the amnio.

Here's what I found on http://www.cdc.gov/mmwr/preview/mmwrhtml/00038393.htm:  

CVS utilizes either a catheter or needle to biopsy placental cells that are derived from the same fertilized egg as the fetus. During amniocentesis, a small sample of the fluid that surrounds the fetus is removed. This fluid contains cells that are shed primarily from the fetal skin, bladder, gastrointestinal tract, and amnion.

Typically, CVS is done at 10-12 weeks' gestation, and amniocentesis is done at 15-18 weeks' gestation. In the United States, the current standard of care in obstetrical practice is to offer either CVS or amniocentesis to women who will be greater than or equal to 35 years of age when they give birth, because these women are at increased risk for giving birth to infants with Down syndrome and certain other types of aneuploidy. Karyotyping of cells obtained by either amniocentesis or CVS is the standard and definitive means of diagnosing aneuploidy in fetuses. The risk that a woman will give birth to an infant with Down syndrome increases with age. For example, for women 35 years of age, the risk is 1 per 385 births (0.3%), whereas for women 45 years of age, the risk is 1 per 30 births (3%) (1). The background risk for major birth defects (with or without chromosomal abnormalities) for women of all ages is approximately 3%.

I find that last statement really interesting.

Anyhow, while I've refused CVS, if my NT scan comes back with a relatively high probability of DS, I will probably do the amnio (with support from Amanda!).  I won't be making that decision until I hear the news from the doctor and while I'll discuss it with my husband, I'll make the final decision.