Trying to get pregnant at 40

[Dee77777]

I've been married two months and I am still not pregnant. I'm doing ovulation tests consecutively and noting my LH surge.  I don't know what's wrong.  Does anyone have advice for me?  From a little desparate and actively trying........

[Leigh2525]

I know you are excited and anxious to conceive, but try to relax, plus do all that other stuff you are doing like seeing the right docs, scheduled sex (oh how romantic!), etc. because all of the things you are doing are going to be stressful, so you need to try to balance that out.  I am only speaking about this from what all of my friends have told me, BUT, I was told by multiple docs (pretty much every GYN i'd seen in the last 20 years)  that there was about a 99% chance I could never conceive.  Guess what?  Out of the blue, not even trying, and had given up hope at almost 42 (in 1 month)...I got pregnant!  I will end my story on that note and just listen to the good advice that these ladies can provide.  Going to the fertility forum suggested by 40smama, and posting here could really be beneficial.  Definitely go to see the doctor also, if you haven't already.  Congrats on your wedding and best of luck on making that special addition to your family!  Leigh2525

[Tulips410]

I used to buy tons of ovulating kits (expensive!), but wasn't as successful with them.  However after reading a few chapters of "Taking Control of Your Fertility", it totally changed things for me in terms of getting pregnant.  Taking that author's recomendations, I charted AM basal temps and recorded my vaginal fluids for the past year.  Understanding the patterns of my cycle (I have somewhat irregular periods), taking note of my temps, fluids, and ovulating symptoms (for me heaches) help me to pin point the day of my ovulation.  Unfortunately, between being too tired to be sexually intimate around ovulating time and had 2 miscarriages in the past 1.5 years, we missed out on a few months.  Finally 2 months ago, my hubby and I put in extra effort and had intercourse every other day starting about a week before expected ovulation date and we got pregnant again.  Everybody's body rhythm is different; the book can help you understand yours better, which can improve your chances of getting the timing right.  I hope you'll get pregnant soon!  I agree with the others that you may want to consider consulting your doc sooner than later.  Take care.      

[adgal]

2 months isn't long at all.  But still, I would probably consult a Dr. sooner rather than later.  Best of luck to you.

[Mochica]

2 months is not a long time TTC. Though I do have girlfriends that got pregnant in 2 - 3 months time. They were younger than me ... 35 ... spring chix ;)! I believe the general rule of thumb is that if you have not had any success for a six month period of time, and you're over 35, you should seek a professional. If you fall in a younger age range, they give you a year TTC ... presumably b/c you have a larger supply of healthy eggs. When I was 38, I went to the doctor after 6 months and we began what became a very expensive road to figuring out what was going on. It started slow and easy and became more progressed. I had my progesterone tested, and a lot of other hormones. That was done through blood work. Then I had a laproscopy which was a minor exploratory surgery. Then a post coital test. Now at 39 years of age, my husband and I have become pregnant. (And I thought I was stressed out before!!! Waiting for the first trimester to pass is so very hard.) BUT, if you want to learn more about your body and how to optimize the timing of your sex for better results ... I'd recommend "Taking Control of Your Fertility." All the women in my family have read it ... I'm the only one that had such a long waiting period. But we all were surprised about how little we actually knew about conception and the way our own bodies work. Women's bodies are truly amazing. When I first started TTC, I thought it would be so easy and was thankful that I hadn't accidentally become pregnant before! It was surreal to me to be fighting to become pregnant.

GOOD LUCK to you and your husband!

[40smama]

Dee - have you posted this on the fertility forum?  The reason I say this is that the women over on that forum have so much knowledge about all things relative to fertility plus they give tons of support to everyone.  I know when I was in my 2ww after IVF, they were wonderful to me.

Since you are 40, I wouldn't wait too much longer to see your dr so you can get things evaluated.  I hope this is some help -  please let me know if I can help any further and SSBD!!