Had my doctors appointment today, I need you ladies:(

[blueeyedtabbycat]

Ok so I posted a few weeks ago about my mid point ultrasound that was done at 17.5 weeks. Well baby girl has ecogenic bowel. I was told that it could be nothing and was advised to take a blood test to determine if baby has downs or cystic fibrosis. Well I took the test a few weeks ago and tried calling for the results and was told that only a doctor can give those to me:( Well since the doctor never called I had assumed that everything was fine. Well today I found out the had been trying to call for the last week and a half. My results were abnormal:( I broke down and started bawling to my doctor. The results were 1:170, but I was told they were really higher because of abnormal ultrasound. I know there is a chance that my baby is fine but in the back of my head I am fearing the worst. I have an appointment to talk with a genic conselor again to set up an amnio. I have always turned down those stupid blood test because I know that they can scare you when nothing is wrong. And now I take it and sure enough. I called my MIL after my appointment today to ask her to watch my kids while I go see the genic conselor on Monday and she asked what I was going to do if baby does have downs? I almost ripped her head off!! What am I going to do? Seriously!! I asked her what she would do and she said she didnt know because she has never been in that situation before. I wanted to kill when she said that it would be alot of work and hinted abortion!! I dont know how I will do it but I will have to because there is no way that I could ever abort!! I feel her move for goodness sakes!! Not that I could ever do it even if I werent so far along, I just dont belive in it.  I just need some hope ladies. Has anyone ever had abnormal ultrasound and triple screen test and nothing be wrong???? I just feel that I had three perfect and healthy boys and now I get  the girl that I have always wanted and look what happens?? Have I tempted fate one too many times????

[AJAX621]

My best friend has 2 healthy  children a boy and a girl, however her test came positove for down both times.  those blood test are worthless.  The amnio  will give you peace of mind.  Good Luck

[SuzM]

All the very best to you tomorrow!
and I am so glad you are feeling a bit better :)
Good luck!!!!

[adgal]

Good luck tomorrow, and I will keep you in my thoughts. Lots of good vibes coming your way!!!  I haven't personally experienced amnio, but my sister in law told me it was sort of like a bee sting...not bad at all.  And think how much better you will feel when it's over and you get your results letting you know its a healthy little girl!!!  Please update us when you feel up to it!!!!  Good luck!!

[blueeyedtabbycat]

Thank you so much for your kind words! You dont know how much better I feel. So this weekend has flown by. I have been trying to stay busy and DH has been hogging the computer so I havent been able to update. My appointment is tomorrow (monday) at 2pm. I just looked at my appointments and realized that I am scheduled for an U/S at 3pm too. I just had one less than 3 weeks ago so im not sure if they are going to do the amnio at the same time or not. I also have to get a shot of RoGham(sp?) Im so nervous. I will post more when I get home tomorrow. I wonder how much the amnio will hurt?? I explained it to DH and he looked like was going to get ill. He had no clue what an amnio was..............................Wish me luck ladies.

[mlb1234]

Talk to the genetic counselor.  I think they will tell you that a 1:170 chance means that your baby has over a 99% chance of being fine!  My odds were 1:80 just considering my age and history and my baby was fine.  I am not sure how much the odds drop from the ultrasound but even if they drop in half you would still have a better chance at a normal pregnancy than I did!  When put into perspective, the odds of anything happening are very low.  
It is scary but just remember that everything happens for a reason and that we are never given more than we can handle.  I agree with Suz that no matter what happens you will be blessed and so thankful for that baby just the way he/she is!!

[SuzM]

I thought long and hard before responding to this thread because I don't want anything I'm about to say to come across as me suggesting there might be something wrong. I don't ! I completely agree with everything everyone said and quite frankly I think that alot
of these odds that get thrown at us do little more than cause us unnecessary heartache and stress. And your MIL didn't help with that "hint" much either. That was thoughtless.
But you did say if you have a baby with Downs you "didn't know how you would do it but you will." and you wanted hope, so I want to share something with you.
When I was much younger I had the joy of being an aide in an elementary school. One of the young girls I looked after was a young girl with Downs named Kylie. She was lovely! She was sweet, loving, could sign and was learning to read like a pro and her Mom and I got close. One afternoon Kylie's Mom got a very heartless comment thrown at her. One of the other moms asked her if she had regrets and if her life wouldn't be easier without Kylie in it. She handled it like a pro. She said her life might be simpler but it certainly wouldn't be better because she couldn't even imagine wishing away the light of her life. So when you said you didn't know how you would handle it, I think I do. I think you'd handle it with the same reaction you had to that MIL's comment, with fierce protectiveness and love for your child, just like Kylie's mom.
So there is some hope for you from me....I think most likely everything will turn out
just the way you hope, but if by some chance it turns out to be a little differently,you'll still be blessed and you'll do great. And I really hope it was ok I said this! My very, very best wishes to you.
Suz

[adgal]

I love the way you put that Super Sally...that is a great way of looking at it.  Chances are 169 in 170 that your little girl is just perfect!!  My sister in law had pretty negative results with either one or both of those tests, I am sorry, I don't recall the specifics.  But like you, she was petrified.  My nephew is healthy and perfect (and turns 1 this month!!)  She had the amnio as per Dr.'s advice and that completely put her mind at ease.  As for your MIL's comment, well, it was insensitive.  I haven't been where you are, but have been through a lot ttc our first.  In my experience people say stupid things...a lot actually.  My MIL has said to me on a few occasions "lots of couples are happy without children".  I think they think they are helping, and I have just learned to ignore it.  Good luck next week, but I would bet on those odds...all will be fine, I have no doubt!!!  

[kmgr32]

I agree with Lisa and Alikat.  I also had a test that came back something like 1:99 for Downs and I have a perfectly healthy 2 1/2 year old DD now.  I got the amnio because I knew that 4 or 5 more months of worry was not going to help anyone.  The amnio will show you that everything is OK.  Hang in there.
Kara

[alikat1205]

thanks tanker! i HATE those tests! i was referred for an amnio and counselled to abort, both of which i refused.  but i was in a state of panic for five months and sure there was something wrong with her.  and there was not one darn thing wrong with her! she's a genius! (lol, doesn't every mother think so?), put in first grade a year early (she missed the cut off but tested in), and keeps us all on our toes.  1:39 my butt.  don't let the numbers get you in a twist.  if you are doing amnio, wait on that.  

[LisaRG]

Those blood tests are just horrible.
I had one when I was preg with my dd and it came out as possibility for downs, I cried for 2 weeks until I had the amnio and she turned out perfectly healthy.  So many of these test come back as false positive.  Their evil.
I bet everything will be fine.

[Tanker Chic]

I'm so sorry.. this must be really scary.  Just try to stay on the optimistic side.  

Alikat, that is a great story.  congrats on your healthy baby and child!!  

[alikat1205]

i had 1:39 of downs based on the test, and my baby is now a first grader and doing great! the amnio will tell you, don't panic just yet.

[kellym]

I agree also. I feel that your baby girl will be perfect and hopefully the amnio will prove that. Did you test + for CF? If you didn't, your baby will not have it.

[40smama]

blue-eyed -

I think everything Super-Sally said is correct especially in regards to your odds.  I know it sounds high but if 1 in 10 is 90% chance of things being okay, you can imagine that 1in 170 is much higher percentile.  Hang in there!

I hear you about being determined not to abort.  I had a super, super abnormal u/s years ago.  Things didn't turn out well for me but for different reasons - nothing to do w/the baby even though my dr suspected that she was not right.  He ended up being wrong and I was glad I just hung in there and didn't listen to anybody's opinion about what I should do.

Bless your heart - I hate to keep saying this but keep thinking positive & definitely keep us updated - jen

[Super_sally888]

Hi,

1 : 170 is actually a low chance of something being wrong. Imagine putting 170 marbles in a box.  closing your eyes and picking out a specific one.

I think there are many cases of problems being suspected and then the baby turning out fine.

There are also cases of women having abortions when problems were suspected only to find they aborted healthy babies.  I know this is not an option for you.  Good for you.  Even if there was something wrong you would manage.

Yes, go ahead with the amnio if it will give you peace of mind / if you must know. do make sure the dr doing the amnio is experienced - it does cary some small risk.

let us know how you go.