First, I am SO very sorry for what you're going through, and I can't imagine the pain. Have you asked that question directly of your doctor? They may have fears of infection if you deliver vaginally, but also, they may not be aware of your desire to hold your baby. I would want an explanation if I were you, and if they can't explain, I would seek a second opinion.
Is it possible they could induce you right away, before she passes?
They said they won't induce me because they won't risk me not dilating and then having to do a unnecessary c section.. But from what I believe she is very small and I'm sure I won't have to dilate that much. I have had 2 children vaginally already so it wouldn't be my first time.
I'm sorry that you're going through this. Something similar happened you a friend of mine And his wife was 20 weeks. They let her push the baby out and they even did a birth certificate and did foot and hand prints. They let her hold the baby as well. I would get a second opinion.
That's rediculous, of course you are allowed to hold your own child. What are their reasons for not allowing you to hold your baby if she has already passed? Here in the Netherlands they give you ample time to be with ur child (alive or passed), you can even get a special fotographer in that can take pictures of you, dad and still-born together. This way you will always have something tangible to hold on to. Get a second opinion. Find someone who will listen.
I'm so sorry. My prayers are with you. You have a choice! Absolutely! I would go for a second opinion as others have stated. Once again I'm very sorry.
Im sorry for what your going through but one thing I can say if you know the power or prayer it does work and God has the last say so not man all things are possible if you believe in him. Just have faith and believe your baby gone be alright
I'm so sorry for this impending loss. I'm sure you've asked every imaginable question to the doctors at this point so the only thing I can suggest is to refuse the procedure if it won't cost you your life. That way they know you're adamant about holding your child. Last year, I had an MC at 16 weeks and as the poster above experienced, my heart was ripped out the moment my daughter came out. I was in a hospital luckily and the midwife cleaned her up and handed her to me. I wasn't quite prepared mentally because it happened so fast but a year later I can say that having held her and having those pictures has certainly helped my grieving. I hope you get to have those precious moments with your baby.