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I need help deciding what to do... Breastfeed or not?
Hey Ladies! I am sorry I havent been on in a while.. I was induced last Thursday the 26th and had baby Colton that night at 10:56pm.... I will post my labor and birth story in a few....
I am really torn on what to do and I need some help pretty quickly... When Colton was born I begna BF and he had a wonderful latch so we thought and he was doing great. The more I breastfead the more painful it became. The nurses in the hospital kept pushing me to continue because I wanted to give up because it hurt so badly, but I didnt. Once we got home things just got worse. I was in tears pain and dreading every feeding. I pumped most feedings and then I just decided to stop. I began giving Colton formula on Tuesday night. I havent pumped or done anything since but I still want to breastfeed but dont at the same time if that makes sense.
My DH is wonderful and he loves getting up with the baby at night and is just an all around wonderful help. I know that is what a lot of women want and It is a blessing, but when beginning to breastfeed it is not a good thing because he will get up and feed him and I wake up in a puddle of milk or engorged. I feel bf is the best for baby but at the same time I dont want to dread doing it and I dont want to be crabby while doing it I want it to be a special time with Colton and weather that means BF or formula feeding then thats fine with me.....
Colton has jaundice (but low risk and his numbers are falling so thats great) and he is a great sleeper... He lost quite a bit of weight when I was BF from 7 lbs 4 oz to 6 lbs 12 oz..... He is also a bitter not a sucker so his latch may be great at the beginning of the feeding but it ***** about 5 min in... They said that they induced me at what we thought was 39 weeks but it seems he is a little earlier than that closer to 37 weeks and that being the case he hasnt mastered sucking like a fullterm baby had....
What would you do? I am desperate ladies and I am in pain from engorgement and leaking all the time... If I am gonna pick this back up I need to do it soon before my milk completely dries up.... I am so close to just pumping to relieve the knots and soreness in my breasts but if I decine to not go back to BF then I will have to go throough all this agian!! HELP
I am really torn on what to do and I need some help pretty quickly... When Colton was born I begna BF and he had a wonderful latch so we thought and he was doing great. The more I breastfead the more painful it became. The nurses in the hospital kept pushing me to continue because I wanted to give up because it hurt so badly, but I didnt. Once we got home things just got worse. I was in tears pain and dreading every feeding. I pumped most feedings and then I just decided to stop. I began giving Colton formula on Tuesday night. I havent pumped or done anything since but I still want to breastfeed but dont at the same time if that makes sense.
My DH is wonderful and he loves getting up with the baby at night and is just an all around wonderful help. I know that is what a lot of women want and It is a blessing, but when beginning to breastfeed it is not a good thing because he will get up and feed him and I wake up in a puddle of milk or engorged. I feel bf is the best for baby but at the same time I dont want to dread doing it and I dont want to be crabby while doing it I want it to be a special time with Colton and weather that means BF or formula feeding then thats fine with me.....
Colton has jaundice (but low risk and his numbers are falling so thats great) and he is a great sleeper... He lost quite a bit of weight when I was BF from 7 lbs 4 oz to 6 lbs 12 oz..... He is also a bitter not a sucker so his latch may be great at the beginning of the feeding but it ***** about 5 min in... They said that they induced me at what we thought was 39 weeks but it seems he is a little earlier than that closer to 37 weeks and that being the case he hasnt mastered sucking like a fullterm baby had....
What would you do? I am desperate ladies and I am in pain from engorgement and leaking all the time... If I am gonna pick this back up I need to do it soon before my milk completely dries up.... I am so close to just pumping to relieve the knots and soreness in my breasts but if I decine to not go back to BF then I will have to go throough all this agian!! HELP
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Thank you for all of your support LosingMyMindinGA.... I dont know what I would have done with out all the advice and support from all of you! I am going through a rough time right now, and all the support was truly a blessing
Good for you. I'm glad you have come to a decision that works for you. Your baby is getting what he needs and that's all that counts.
I decided to go ahead and formula feed!!! I have come to terms that I tried really hard and it just didnt work!!! Thank you all for all of your advice and support...
The guilt is the hardest part. I formula fed my oldest, BF and supplemented the next two then exclusively BF #4 until almost 4 months and #5 until 6 months then went to formula. Now they have formulas that so much like breastmilk! If the guilt is eating you up, try just pumping for awhile and bottle feeding the breastmilk. I know that for ME it really helped alleviate that guilty feeling.
Thank you all for your comments.... I am still up in the air with what to do. I am still leaking ALOT!!! I just have this guilty feeling if I dont do it but my DH keeps telling me that he thinks the formula is just fine. I was a formula fed baby and I am fine. I guess I just feel like I am giving up or letting him down!! I am just so upset!
I was in pain from bf'ing for the first 6-8 weeks or so on one particular breast. And, for the first week I was absolutely miserable! I even had to pump because my nipples were bleeding and I couldn't take the pain. It wasn't until day 5 or 6 that I was introduced to the Lansinoh Lanolin cream as another mommy suggested. It really is great stuff - good for the chapped/dry/bleeding nipples and you don't have to wash it off. Just put a pea sized amount on your nipple after each feeding. That really helped with the sore nipples. Once the baby is a little bigger, it does get a lot easier to bf. I ended up lasting until 10 months, but at that point it was only one feeding a day since he ate table food by that point, too.
I should have consulted a lactation consultant, but I didn't. I did borrow a book from a friend called The Breastfeeding Answer Book put out by La Leche League International. It is like the bible of breastfeeding...you may be able to find it at the library or a used book store. It helped me sort of figure out what the pains were and how to help them.
Oh, and the latch that was explained to me in the breastfeeding class was to put your boob in the baby's mouth as if it were a hamburger. So, you hold your boob with your hand in a "C" shape and smoosh it like a hamburger - however if your baby is turned sideways, from your angle at the top, it looks more hot-dogish. But it goes in their mouth as if a smooshed hamburger would. I know, sounds silly, but it does work. If the baby latches and it hurts, then he's not on there right. So, remove him and try again. That was my biggest problem and why I had so much pain at first, but once I figured out the way to hold my boob properly in his mouth, it was so much better.
I think if I were you, I'd pump and bottle feed until you truly decide to give it up. But, like the others said, don't feel guilty if you do switch to formula - there are plenty of us (me included) who were formula fed and turn out perfectly healthy. :-) Best of luck to you - I know the pains you are going through!!
I should have consulted a lactation consultant, but I didn't. I did borrow a book from a friend called The Breastfeeding Answer Book put out by La Leche League International. It is like the bible of breastfeeding...you may be able to find it at the library or a used book store. It helped me sort of figure out what the pains were and how to help them.
Oh, and the latch that was explained to me in the breastfeeding class was to put your boob in the baby's mouth as if it were a hamburger. So, you hold your boob with your hand in a "C" shape and smoosh it like a hamburger - however if your baby is turned sideways, from your angle at the top, it looks more hot-dogish. But it goes in their mouth as if a smooshed hamburger would. I know, sounds silly, but it does work. If the baby latches and it hurts, then he's not on there right. So, remove him and try again. That was my biggest problem and why I had so much pain at first, but once I figured out the way to hold my boob properly in his mouth, it was so much better.
I think if I were you, I'd pump and bottle feed until you truly decide to give it up. But, like the others said, don't feel guilty if you do switch to formula - there are plenty of us (me included) who were formula fed and turn out perfectly healthy. :-) Best of luck to you - I know the pains you are going through!!
I worked with a LC several times, but my daughter just couldn't get a good latch. 90% of the time I pumped and gave her the milk in a bottle. I did that for about 6 months then switched over to formula. Don't beat yourself up about having a baby with a latching problem. While I was trying to nurse her I ended up getting double mastatis from not getting all the milk out. It was horrible. I agree with an above poster who said pumping is quicker because it was for me too. I could pump in 15 minutes and bottle feed vs. the 1 hour disaster or trying to nurse.
I didn't read everybody elses comments but I breastfed my two kids, but didn't have any problems. If I were in your shoes I would pump as long as I could so that he still gets your good mommy milk and your milk won't dry up and then I would see a lactaction consultant. She watches the baby latch on and might be able to help fix the problem. Good luck!
I didn't read the responses, so sorry if I repeat, BUT Lansinoh Lanolin!!!! OMG it's awesome, Aubryana was a biter too, and has grown out of it, she's six months in a few days and she stopped about 3-4 months, BUT the lanolin, I put it on, and you don't have to wash it off before BFing, but I swear it's magical or something. I can't feel her on me when I use it. I still do because I get sore from time to time, but it is a MIRACLE worker!
Before deciding, I would consult a lactation consultant. She can give you an idea of why it is painful, help you determine how much milk he is getting, and let you know what the solution may be. It can be as simple as trying a different position to get a better latch, or it can be something more difficult to overcome like coordination issues, high pallat, small mouth, etc. Once you know what is wrong, you can make a decision that it best for you. If you make this decision without learning why there is a problem, you may regret it later on. A good LC is worth her weight on gold. Good luck and congrats on the birth of your little one!
Several moms have highly recommended to me to contact the La Leche league.You can google them - they have chapters everywhere and will often send a bf consultant out to help for free. Two of my friends had a lot of pain and the consultant was able to teach them how to reposition the baby and the way it was latching, and for them that made the pain stop. They both said they would not have been able to continue bf if they did not have that help. Best of luck to you!
one thing I've heard after talking to lots and lots of mommys is that some women say breast feeding is amazing and pain free, other say it cause a little soreness but others say it's horribly painful and excruciating. Only YOU know how it feels and you can't let anyone pressure you because only you can decide. The fact of the matter is either way your baby is going to be just fine so do what is best for you and your family!
I think if I were in your shoes, I would pump and feed him breastmilk out of a bottle. Have you talked to anyone about the pain and why it might be so painful?? My friends baby wouldn't latch on, and her mother in law was SO adamant that she breast feed. So she just pumped and froze it. It was VERY time consuming for her though...she's ALWAYS either pumping or feeding, so if you have a job I'm not sure how realistic that would really be for you. But since I don't work, that would be my choice.
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My kids have ALWAYS had issues with latching for several reasons. They have all been born with pretty bad underbites, I have big nipples and one is inverted. So latching is really hard and becomes excrutiatingly painful. with my first two I forced myself to continue as much as I could while supplementing with formula until about 3 months. I spent hours crying and feeling like a failure.
With my last two I gave it a good hearted effort in the beginning and when things went down the same road no matter what I did, I stopped actually nursing and started pumping and bottle feeding. With Gabe I went to almost 4 months, with Lily I went to 6. By pumping I was able to not only help keep check on my milk supply (another issue I face) but I was still able to give them the breastmilk.
In the beginning pumping hurt just as much as BFing did, but it got easier a lot faster becuase it was a proper latching/sucking. At the very least I would continue pumping and bottle feeding until you decide. You may find that once he gets a little bigger the latch might be easier, or he may refuse the boob and you can continue pumping.
Most of all, DO NOT feel like a failure. As much hype as breastfeeding gets about being natural and that any woman can do it. It's NOT true. Many of us have issues and other barriers that prevent successful bfing so you just do what you can. The entire point of BFing is to give the baby the breastmilk so it should matter if it comes straight from the boob or from a bottle.
If you do go with pumping you need to make sure to invest in a good hospital grade pump or it wont' be efficient enough. Many hospitals/lactation consultants will loan or rent them out.