Parenting

[Lexiewise]

I am currently in a situation where my baby's dad and me have split and we both have significant others, I am due October 5. Am I thinking hypocritically if I don't want my baby's dads girlfriend to be called mom but my boyfriend, who has been here 75% of the time I was pregnant, I want him to be dad or whatever she wants to call him. I just don't know if I'm thinking fairly and unbiased. I don't want to cause a fight by telling his girlfriend I wouldn't like her to be called mom. I am 20 and so is the dad, but his girlfriend is 17 and they haven't been together long...

[jess-ann5]

I don't think it is anyone's choice but the child. Neither you, your boyfriend or neither of your spouses should tell the child what to call your significant other... until they are old enough to understand the difference & make their own choice! When they are under 3 years old, yes the mommy/daddy thing should be reserved for the parents being that a child doesn't really understand the "step-parent" concept. But understand, regardless of what you tell him to do, it may not always be done.

I have two step-children. I have been with them since they were 12 months old. I have never told them to call me mommy. I always introduced myself as Jessi. They slipped up a few times and called me mommy and at such a young age, that is natural but I always corrected them. In their eyes, they see someone with boobs taking care of them like a mommy is supposed to. Lol When my step children got older, about 3 or 4, they started questioning what I was. I explained to them that I was their step-mother, will always be a mother to them even though they weren't in my belly, but they don't have to call me mommy. I gave THEM the choice of what to call me. Sometimes they call me mommy, sometimes Jessi. It upsets their real mom but I could care less. I have been there and always will be there to raise these kids. I've fed them, clothed them, taken care of them, enrolled them into school, taken them to doctor appointments, etc. I am a good mother to them. What they call me really means nothing in comparison of the bond we share.  

[ericatoday]

My son considers my bf dad but calls him by his first name because that's his choice. But if my son called my exs gf mom I'd be pissed because he is rarely in my sons life and who know how long she will be in his. But my bf has been there for 4 years and will be there forever as a father even when we broke up at one point he still came and picked up my son as if we had joint custody.

[alexx1216]

I agree with everyone else, why should your boyfriend be dad, or his girlfriend be mom? It doesnt make any sence when your daughter will already have a mom & dad in her life. Your baby ofcores so your choice, just doesn't seem very appropriate that's all.

[2ndBabyDueFeb13th]

Neither should be calling anyone but the mother and father, mom and dad, u are mom, and dad is dad. Ur boyfriend will be a fther figure, but he has a first name and if biological dad is in the babys life then HE will be dad. I would be very concerned if the father of my child was dating a 17 year old and had her around my baby. You guys are adults, and that is innapropriate. She is likely not going to be mature enough to accept your child and that could lead to serious issues in their home. Be careful and make sure u guys get a visitation agreement for the father to see his child safely

[jordyvi0824]

I think it should be the child's choice honestly! My fiancés kids hut recently decided that they wanted to start calling me mom and I'm fine with it but up until then try didn't want to and that was fine with me as well you can't force a kid to call anyone anything they will know what feels right for them

[Lexiewise]

Thanks, and me and my boyfriend are talking about getting married not soon but hopefully sometime he also brought up that after me and him are married he sees it would be acceptable to have her call him dad.

[Lenaaa_]

My son is 3 and I've been with my boyfriend for 3years my son calls him by his first name and calls his dad daddy don't confuse your baby

[mitch_14]

I personally believe only the child's mom and dad should be called mom and dad if they are both involved in the child's life. I am sure your babies dad feels the same way about not wanting some other man called dad by HIS child. Not to mention who knows  how long this guy will be in yours or your child's lives...

[julieeenewmum]

Yea i agree till your daughter is ready & there staying for good

[julieeenewmum]

Neither should be called mom or dad

[shib181]

I would talk to the baby's dad and tell him you only want him to have her called mom when she is ready to step up too it. I wouldn't let my niece and nephews call my man uncle until I was sure he was sticking around and we were engaged

[JustineBreOnna]

Neither of the significant others should be called mom or dad for the emotional sake of your child...your child should know you are mom and he is dad, even if he's not the greatest...a child shouldn't grow up not knowing who their real fatheris