Baby Gender (Rant)

[CountryMomToBe]

Why is everyone sooo obsessed with finding out baby's gender?  Seriously, I read posts on here about people that are DEPRESSED bc they are having a boy or a girl.  I just think it is ridiculous that people can't be grateful for the fact that they are having a baby! It took my husband and I two years to get pregnant and I couldn't be more excited to just BE pregnant.  I didn't even want to know the gender  because of all the people around us (family members mostly) making a big stink about it saying "it better be a boy" or "i had a nightmare, you had a girl!" I feel like it is a terribly selfish thing to worry about.  

As far as clothing and accessories, I think it's crazy that people want or say they need so many material things for their babies... Pink frilly this for her or blue whales or whatever for him...

Anyway.  I just wish people could be more appreciative of the gift they are given in utero.

There's nothing wrong with wanting to know gender in some cases, it just seems like SOME people put too much importance in it.  It's ridiculous.

[AprilDawn87]

Well said Treksy! I think people are so stuck in their own beliefs they can't possibly understand that no 2 people feel the same. Some people are more prone to depression than others. Let's stop ranting about how other people feel and just skip over it if you don't like it. I could rant all day on here about how misinformed and immature some people are, but I chose not to because it's not my business. 12 days left for this mamma! Good luck ladies.

[lallee33]

I never wanted boys but I have 2 of them 11 and 5.  I am now on my third pregnancy and hoping this time it will be a girl.  I am sure I will be the depressed individual you speak of but hey that is my problem.  We all get up set when we do get what we want in life but you work hard for it. Unfortunately the gender of your baby is not up to you, so yeah some folks may get depressed.

[Treksy]

I think you're very harsh. Lets chalk it up to hormones shall we?

Gender disapointment is very common and normal. It happens to some people. My cousin is having her 4th and last child. She has 3 boys. Guess what she wants....a girl! Theres nothing wrong with wanting to know what its like to have a daughter or son!
Everyone has expectations and ideas of their ideal situation and when we cant have that its very normal to be a little let down!
Shame on anyone who thinks they have it aaaalllll figured out and can go round dispensing judgement and "advice" to others!

I wanted a girl this time,got a boy a second boy,sure I was a little disapointed at first but I got over it really quick and it doesnt mean in any way shape or form that I wont love him or that Im not happy to be pregnant!

Sheesh!
I can certainly understand with difficulty getting pregnant you having these feelings but not everyone has them. A difficult perscpective to have when its not yours...


I knew a lady who it took 13 yrs to get pregnant. She had almost given up hope. She got pregnant,and wanted a boy. Does that make her selfish for having a hope? No! Each of my pregnancies she was rooting for teams pink or blue for me. She never once took her difficulties getting pregnant and shoved em in my face and told me to be happy either way!

Relax, leave others to their own devices. Youve got your pregnancy. What do you care how they feel? Lol

[starresky]

Wow!!! I think this is the most comments I've seen on one persons comment/question...

As a person that believes that all children are a blessing but whom is also a person that suffers from depression, I can see both points of view...

Like she said up above let's enjoy some cake and get fat together:-)

[mumma23]

I love finding out the sex of my babies both GIRLS
But i couldnt have been happier either way BOY or GIRL  
I think its such a huge gift to have a healthy baby the sex really doeant matter to me but i still love finding out :-)

[mommyzel]

Calm down ladies. Lets all eat some cake and celebrate getting fat together!

[kecook731]

I agree that it is upsetting to think that someone could be "depressed" about the fact that their baby isn't the gender they "really" wanted. A baby is a blessing boy or girl. I am currently pregnant with my third boy, and I was really annoyed in the beginning, before we knew what we were having, when people would say "I hope its a girl" or "I bet you are hoping for a girl". I really wasn't. My husband and I have always said we wanted three children. I don't know why, that was just always our number. Neither of us ever said we had to have one sex or the other. We just wanted three. I love my boys more than anything and I am thrilled to be having another. I like finding out the sex only because I feel more bonded with my baby being able to call him by his name already. It's sad that those women can't find the joy in their baby because of gender when there are so many women who want a child of their own but have been unsuccessful.

[MamaMacMurtry]

My husband & I want to fond out the gender of our baby so we can start using his or her name as soon as baby is able to hear us talk to him or her in utero. We've already chosen our baby's name whether its a boy or girl, and I have read studies that have found that babies who are referred to by name in utero generally recognize and respond to their name earlier once they are born-plus....it will be nice to be able to only write one gender pronoun-lol.

[worried_mommy213]

Everyone is getting way to upset at someone expressing their personal opinion. She never said "I do t understand why people even care to know the gender" and she never asked anyone to explain themselves. All she said was that it upsety her to know that there are people out there DEPRESSED, not disappointed, not just hoping. But DEPRESSED about what they are having, and from her point of view (as a women who strict with getting pregnant) it makes her both sad and mad that people even make those kinds of comments. I completely understand, some some are not as luck to convince quickly. It takes years if they are even lucky to conceive at all. I went through a period where I almost hated being around pregnant women cause I say it all as a blessing and they only complained about the negative stuff. Its hard, but everyone is different..

[junebaby25]

Almost every couple I know that didn't want to know and got all neutral gender gifts never used them. They all went re-shopping after the baby based on the sex. I wanted to find out so me and my family can all prepare

[youngnewmommy]

We have also tried for 2 years and I don't care what I'm having just happy it finally happened. I do want to know the gender cuz this is his familys 1st grandbaby. They want buy stuff. I respect that..

[wishes2891]

I don't think there's anything wrong with wanting to know gender. We didn't find out with our first and it wasn't any more exciting in my opinion. It was kind of boring actually bc everything we bought had to be gender neutral and that took some of the fun out of shopping. With the next three we found out gender and it felt so much more special. We were able to have fun shopping and call the baby by it's name instead of just referring to it as "the baby" all the time so it felt more real and part of the family sooner. With the first three I reallydidn't care what the gender was but this last one we did hope for a boy. Partly to keep the numbers even, we already have two girls and one boy, and partly bc our boy was by far the easiest baby. So I was a little disappointed for a few days. Not depressed but a little disappointed. I don't have any trouble getting pregnant so I don't think it's fair to think I'm an awful person for hoping for a certain gender just bc someone else does have trouble. I don't know how you feel just like you don't know how I feel. We can only feel what our experiences lead us to feel.

[Three_n_1onTheWay]

I wanted a boy, because my boyfriend has girls, and I wanted to be able to give him a boy. We are having a girl. Even did the Chinese birth calendar, it said the baby would be a boy. That's the only time it was wrong. This will be my fourth baby, and my last. I have two boys and a girl, now, two girls. I was so psyched to be pregnant again. It took a couple days to get used to calling her "her", because we both wanted a boy. But, a baby is a blessing, no matter what sex it is.

[14yearslater]

I agree with baby_love2014. It took me and my husband 5 years to get pregnant after our first one was an ectopic pregnancy.  I am very thankful to so far have a healthy pregnant not to mention I have diabetes high blood pressure and high cholesterol.  I am a high risk pregnancy.  To know what I am having just helps me feel 1 more prepared to purchase and decorated for my bundle of joy and 2 to help me realize how good god is and how blessed I am. No one around me including coworkers were saying anything negative everyone is happy and hoping for a girl which at 16 weeks I found out it's a girl. To each their own I think the people around you aren't that positive and the people you see having issues with what they were blessed with again has issues.

[SaSa28]

Nicx you were lucky. Im in Calgary. In my last pregnancy I attended 3 diffrent clunics. They all told me the same thing  that was 8+ months ago.

[aa88]

Loosen up lady! Its fun to know the gender, for the planning decorating baby shower..

[Nicx13]

I'm from Edmonton Alberta and I was able to find out from the tech??? I really didn't care either way just happy to be having a healthy baby

[finallyprego]

For me and my husband we have been trying for so long all we wanted was a healthy baby but we wanted to know what we were having.  After 10 years of trying and infertility treatments we are finally pregnant with a baby girl.

[aprilj93]

Everyone has their own reasons and its wrong to judge them for it. I was depressed with my first because it was a girl and I thought so badly that my hubbs would be disappointed so I seriously cried, everyone has their own stuff to deal with. My husband was thrilled to have a girl! And come to find out we are expecting another girl, I was a bit sad that I'll never have a boy cause not everyone has the privilege to have more then one or two kids. But I'm happy again and cant wait for her to be here.

[Amy1830]

Sometimes people have good reasons for wanting a certain gender. I mean its a matter of opinion I guess if you think it's a good reason or not. Personally I really do want a girl because I already have a 9 yr old boy from a previous relationship who's biological father isn't in his life. And now I am engaged and pregnant and even though my son and fiancé are very close I'm nervous that my son would grow up feeling jealous if I had a boy because that boy would be my fiance's biological son. I don't think my fiancé would intentionally treat them different but I think there would still be differences. Therefore that's why I would like a daughter. But if it turns out I'm having a boy I'm not going to be depressed at all.

[brit333]

I wanted another girl because I already have one and there are tons of boys in my family. I wanted my daughter to have another girl in the family to play with. I knew I was having a boy before finding out and ya I was a little sad but it's growing on my now and I will have fun with a bit just as much my little girl.

[Brittany12385]

None of these ladies need to even explain why they want to know the gender bc its their life, so let them live it they way they would like, it's none of your concern. Yes it's irrational to get depressed over a gender you didn't want, but then again its not your life. Be happy with what you have and mind your business.

[SaSa28]

Well here in Ab canada. There is a rule with the tecs. They are not to give out the sex for these exact reasions. So dont feel too bad. Many woman out there are cluless u til they have their baby

[Heather4800]

When people ask if I want a boy or a girl I just say I want a healthy baby!