Aa
FTM... Ripping during birth?? im terrified!
So I'm 22 weeks pregnant. Most of my close friends are all moms and their birthing stories scare the heck out of me! The ripping of the vagina some more than others stitches.. Epidural no epidural.. I guess after hearing a few of these stories it just has my mind running wild. Any of you mommy's have any advice on labor and delivery.. Or if you don't mind sharing your story. I know it will be one of the most painful things in life I go through but I know my little boy will be worth it all.
My daughter had a head circumference above the 97 percentile, and I only tore minimally (one stitch). My son's head was 86 percentile, and no tear. The thing you need to do is ease baby out. Pushing a baby out is like taking a big dump, and you're so relieved when the head crowns that all you want to do is keep pushing. But to avoid tearing, you have to be patient. Here's what you do: push as coached until the head is part way out. At this point, if you are still in the middle of a contraction, you will feel the urge to continue pushing. Don't. Instead, pant through the rest of the contraction (as if your life depends on it. Rapid breathing is the only thing that will keep your body occupied enough to hold off on pushing. Once the contraction is over, the urge to push will go away for a bit, though you will feel kind of uncomfortable because you've got a baby sticking out between your legs. When the next contraction hits, bear down and push for all you're worth, and that should be that. Allowing your vagina to stretch out slowly should lessen or completely avoid your chance of tears. Good luck!
Thank you ladies so much!!! All your stories were amazing and so entertaining to read. I appreciate it!<3 I am a little less anxious. I actually just found out I have placenta previa not fully but its still scary.. Something else to worry about now. I just hope baby comes healthy and safe. Trying to just relax and think positive.
Yes Santa Cruz :)
I was induced at 41 weeks and had my baby less then 12 hours later. Pushed her out in 30 minuets. My epidural didn't work , and I didn't have any other medication. I tore very badly. I didn't tear my perineum but I tore lots on the inside and my labia was almost torn completely off. Recovery had been much worse then the actual birth.
I tore with my son and didn't even realize it. It was nothing major and I was fine
The actual process of tearing and having a baby I think is very tolerable.. you are in a different world as far and emotions and a feeling that is overwhelming, it's the recovery from a bad tear that *****..
I had my son no medication or anything at all, that's just the way I wanted it. I had bad lower back labor pain, but you just have to remember to breath through it all (not hyperventilate), stay calm and focused, find a rhythm, I was scared of all of the horror stories I had heard to but you just gotta be calm and healthy for your baby and the whole labor process. It is painful but will be totally worth it, I just kept picturing my son's face and what it was Goin to look like and it only took me 3 contractions to get him out. I did tear but didn't notice till midwife told me. You are so exhausted, yet very overwhelmed with emotions that it goes quick. Good luck!
It doesn't "ruin" your vagina, it just changes it. You can't expect to push a baby out and not have it change you. When they stich you, they do it well. I was actually tighter than before, which is probably why it hurt for a while. Ask anyone who has done it both vaginally and by c-section and they will tell you it's much easier to heal from a vaginal birth.
Like the ladies stated above....not every birth story is the same. We are all different and handle the pain differently. I had two relatively good labor and deliveries with my kids.
With my son I started having the contractions about 6pm. It was uncomfortable for a couple of hours. I decided I would take a warm bath at about 8pm. By then the contractions were increasing...not unbearable yet. My husband called the midwife and his mother and they both said head to hospital to get checked out, it was about 8:30 by now. I got dressed with the aid of my friend and we headed to the hospital that is 40 minutes away. When I got there they checked me I was 5cm dilated...wasn't too bad yet. Got admitted by 9:20pm. Contractions intensified...but I breathed through it, eyes closed and had ice chips to help me. By 10pm, I was 6cm. They popped my water sometime between 7cm and 9cm...don't remember it's been a few years lol. The water popping was more uncomfortable but lasted a few seconds. This really got the ball rolling faster. Around 7cm they gave me an epidural...I asked for. Once I hit about 9cm...my Lil man's oxygen levels dropped so they came in and gave oxygen and turned me. I began pushing about 4am...with the assistance of the vacuum because my son had the cord around his arm and his levels kept dropping along with his heart rate. 4:10am he was born. It was quick. I only had 2 small tears internally. I didn't feel.
Now with my daughter, I began having contractions at 12am. I had just eaten some raisin bran and was playing a game on my comp. I decided they weren't bad yet so I would get some rest. I was awoken at 6am with stronger contractions. Got hubby up and we headed to hospital. I was 6cm by that time. They admitted me. They started iv fluids and said I had to wait for epidural to get all the fluids in. My nurse kept saying natural is best..I didn't want to. I got through my contractions by breathing, eyes closed,and ice chips. I felt a pop and gush about 8am and was 9cm by then..I had no choice but to go natural with no pain meds or epi. I began pushing at 8:30. They put this pole up that wrapped around the bed and told me to squat and push. This apparently helped her come out more but I had no energy to continue so I layer back down and pushed about 2 more times and she was out. I had no cuts,tears, or lacerations due to midwife massaging down below. I have to say it wasn't that bad naturally and you get to walk around after and get a warm shower unlike with the epi you can't move until it wears off completely. Both were relatively easy for me and the contractions hurt the most once I hit 8-9cms..before that it was very uncomfortable and stomach tightening. I am now doing again with my third that is due Oct 2. My son and daughters b days are 11/2 & 2/2. Their due dates were the 4th. Good luck and just learn ways of coping with the pain and you'll do fine. Also the massage works wonders.
With my son I started having the contractions about 6pm. It was uncomfortable for a couple of hours. I decided I would take a warm bath at about 8pm. By then the contractions were increasing...not unbearable yet. My husband called the midwife and his mother and they both said head to hospital to get checked out, it was about 8:30 by now. I got dressed with the aid of my friend and we headed to the hospital that is 40 minutes away. When I got there they checked me I was 5cm dilated...wasn't too bad yet. Got admitted by 9:20pm. Contractions intensified...but I breathed through it, eyes closed and had ice chips to help me. By 10pm, I was 6cm. They popped my water sometime between 7cm and 9cm...don't remember it's been a few years lol. The water popping was more uncomfortable but lasted a few seconds. This really got the ball rolling faster. Around 7cm they gave me an epidural...I asked for. Once I hit about 9cm...my Lil man's oxygen levels dropped so they came in and gave oxygen and turned me. I began pushing about 4am...with the assistance of the vacuum because my son had the cord around his arm and his levels kept dropping along with his heart rate. 4:10am he was born. It was quick. I only had 2 small tears internally. I didn't feel.
Now with my daughter, I began having contractions at 12am. I had just eaten some raisin bran and was playing a game on my comp. I decided they weren't bad yet so I would get some rest. I was awoken at 6am with stronger contractions. Got hubby up and we headed to hospital. I was 6cm by that time. They admitted me. They started iv fluids and said I had to wait for epidural to get all the fluids in. My nurse kept saying natural is best..I didn't want to. I got through my contractions by breathing, eyes closed,and ice chips. I felt a pop and gush about 8am and was 9cm by then..I had no choice but to go natural with no pain meds or epi. I began pushing at 8:30. They put this pole up that wrapped around the bed and told me to squat and push. This apparently helped her come out more but I had no energy to continue so I layer back down and pushed about 2 more times and she was out. I had no cuts,tears, or lacerations due to midwife massaging down below. I have to say it wasn't that bad naturally and you get to walk around after and get a warm shower unlike with the epi you can't move until it wears off completely. Both were relatively easy for me and the contractions hurt the most once I hit 8-9cms..before that it was very uncomfortable and stomach tightening. I am now doing again with my third that is due Oct 2. My son and daughters b days are 11/2 & 2/2. Their due dates were the 4th. Good luck and just learn ways of coping with the pain and you'll do fine. Also the massage works wonders.
My water broke around 6am my water never broke so I didn't know Wat to expect so I woke up and took a shower thinking y am I wet so I get back to sleep woke back up @7am with the same problem took another shower layed in the bed rolled to my right then to my left it felt like I pee on myself so I asked my husband was I wet he was like yes so I got back in the shower got out and called the dr they told me to come in to get checked that was at 8:00am me not knowing I wouldn't be going home till three days later I drive my self up there cuz my plan was to go back home and cook and clean so my husband stayed home and starting on cooking I get there and find out I was 3cm and water did brake in my bed I had her at 9:49pm march 8 2012
That sounds horrible. Im scared for my vagina. How does that not ruin your vagina? I think im gonna demand a csection.
Every labor and delivery is different listening to all the horor stories will only stress you out. With my first i was scared but i delivered her all natural and didn't even cry don't get me wrong it was painful but it wasn't as bad as everyone made me think it would be and honestly i feel like a bad *** now because i did it with no drugs but everyone has different pain tolerance and like i said before every labor and delivery is different even if you have multiple children you will have a new experience with each one
P these are all negative stories! Lol I feel like this probably isn't helping your anxiety. For me, I was 40+4 and started having contractions in the evening but I had a Dr appointment the next morning so I slept and went in for that. Was dilated to 3cm so they sent me home. Around 4pm my water broke and we went back in and got admitted at 4.5cm. I got an epidural and had to go on pitocin to speed things up pushed for 70 minutes and my daughter was born at 7:08am thr next morning. Because my daughter's shoulders were so broad they had to tear me and I got internal and external stiches (at least 6). I was swollen for 2 days but taking the meds they gave me at the hospital (Tylenol and motrin) Made everything go down really fast. I was out and about at a bridal shower 4 days after she was born. Sex was painful for a while (14 weeks) but I'm actually looking forward to labour this time. It's very empowering.
I was also cut and had alot of stitches don't know what degree it was, I'm pregnant with my second and it scares me to have natural bith again. Only because of the stitches.
Wow, my story sounds so tame in comparison to some of these ladies!
I woke up around 1 a.m. having contractions every 6-8 minutes apart. I immediately did hair and makeup (I wanted to be prepared for those pictures!) While I waited for contractions to continue. I started to get some bloody show and decided it was time to go. The contractions were totally bearable and never did get to a point where I was screaming or anything like that. I checked in to the hospital and I was only 3-4cm dilated but they admitted me because my blood pressure was high. They kept an eye on Me and baby, gave me an epidural and by 11 a.m. I was pushing. I had a 4th degree tear and yes, I felt the sting of it happening. There was no time for the doctor to help prevent it because my baby shot out in one go so there was no warning!! It definitely stung and hurt when they were stitching me up, but honestly its almost just a nuisance because you Will be all about seeing and holding your child for the first time. Its almost like an out of body experience and you don't really care what's happening with you anymore.
My advice is not to worry about it or spend too much time thinking about it. You will stress yourself out, and when it comes to labor, you and your body will naturally go with the flow.
I woke up around 1 a.m. having contractions every 6-8 minutes apart. I immediately did hair and makeup (I wanted to be prepared for those pictures!) While I waited for contractions to continue. I started to get some bloody show and decided it was time to go. The contractions were totally bearable and never did get to a point where I was screaming or anything like that. I checked in to the hospital and I was only 3-4cm dilated but they admitted me because my blood pressure was high. They kept an eye on Me and baby, gave me an epidural and by 11 a.m. I was pushing. I had a 4th degree tear and yes, I felt the sting of it happening. There was no time for the doctor to help prevent it because my baby shot out in one go so there was no warning!! It definitely stung and hurt when they were stitching me up, but honestly its almost just a nuisance because you Will be all about seeing and holding your child for the first time. Its almost like an out of body experience and you don't really care what's happening with you anymore.
My advice is not to worry about it or spend too much time thinking about it. You will stress yourself out, and when it comes to labor, you and your body will naturally go with the flow.
Your dr./midwife could due some massage while you push to help. But I think some women just stretch better than others. They cut me and I tore. I ended up with a 4th degree laceration that took over 45 mins to be sewn up. And still have problems 11 years later. It is rare but it does happen. (The 4th degree)
I tore & had to be cut with both of mine. Had stitches on the inside & out. Horrible
Btw.. 831?? That SC?
I was in labor with my son 15 hours.. neglected to get the epidural until I was at an 8..they did not want to give it to me so they only gave me an hours worth (which I didn't even know was possible) then I was ready to push.. it took almost 3 hours to push him out and all the while his heart rate would drop with every push, so they brought in the vacuum. I pushed while they pulled and let's just say my tear was a 3rd degree.. BUT, it felt so good to actually get him out that I didn't notice.. I was holding my precious Lil man when I felt an awkward tugging down there, I asked what they were doing and they said stitching you up.. I was like oh $h!t.. the recovery for me was absolutely horrible (sorry) I couldn't sit for over actually month without a pillow under my tush, sits baths, then running out of stool softeners almost gave me a panic attack.. but the whole lesson here.. I swore I would NEVER do that again, and I'm due in 12 days.. hahaha your kids are just that worth it! Or we are just that crazy.. but I think I'm more scared this time =0
I tore with my daughter. It is scary to think about but at the time I didn't even realize it had happened until after. You won't feel it happen. Good luck x
With my first I went natural(with only an iv) I went into labor(what I thought was just a minor upset stomach) while I was at school, got out of school went hme and went to bed. Around 2 am the next morning, I woke up in pain(not excruciating pain, but enough to wake me up). Thank God my big sis was home with me at the time because my mom was still at work, we pick up my son's father and headed to the hospital. Once we arrived I was 2cm, they said that if I dilate to 5 they would admit me. Around 4:30 I was at 5 cm. I was admitted and taken to another room. At 8 the doctor manually broke my water and by 10:30 my son was born. I had to get cut to keep from tearing and stitches but I didn't feel a thing because I was holding my son. With my second I had to be induced because he didnt want to come out lol
Google perinatal massage. It helps you to stretch out and not tear
Try to breath through the contractions
And have a good support team either SO or family member or friend. If you do get the epidural try to rest and sleep because you'll need your energy when it comes to pushing. Here is my labor story
At 38+4 early morning I lost my mucus plug and started getting some mild contractions. That same day I had an appointment with midwife I was finally dilated to 1cm and 50% effaced
asked if she could do a membrane sweep she asked if I was sure because I was due for csection due ultrasounds saying baby would be 10+ ... After she did the sweep (11am) I started getting some contractions. I went for a walk with my mom at the mall (husband was at work) contractions started coming 5 -6min apart. Came home and took a shower and etc. By 5pm I went to hospital they sent me home because I was at 1 n half cm. Once I got home contractions got worse 3-4 min apart. I stayed home until the next morning 530am I went back to l&d after walking for 3 hours I ended up with a fever of 100.4 and was passing out. Later i Gave in to the epidural I felt like I was about to rip faces off. After babys heartbeat was dropping .They informed me I might need an emergency csection. They broke my water and placed a balloon inside me to release pressure off the cord (wrapped around him) thank god his heart stayed strong. (I was put on oxygen) sadly epidural stopped working and I felt everything. I pushed for 51 minutes (i felt when the midwife cut me) soon as he came out the midwife called for NICU as soon as she did people came rushing in and no one was telling me what was wrong . Finally after what seemed a life time I heard my precious baby cry (he came out not breathing and blue) he was born Oct 3rd 10:13pm weighing 8lbs 5oz and 23inch long !
Thank god he is healthy!
And have a good support team either SO or family member or friend. If you do get the epidural try to rest and sleep because you'll need your energy when it comes to pushing. Here is my labor story
At 38+4 early morning I lost my mucus plug and started getting some mild contractions. That same day I had an appointment with midwife I was finally dilated to 1cm and 50% effaced
asked if she could do a membrane sweep she asked if I was sure because I was due for csection due ultrasounds saying baby would be 10+ ... After she did the sweep (11am) I started getting some contractions. I went for a walk with my mom at the mall (husband was at work) contractions started coming 5 -6min apart. Came home and took a shower and etc. By 5pm I went to hospital they sent me home because I was at 1 n half cm. Once I got home contractions got worse 3-4 min apart. I stayed home until the next morning 530am I went back to l&d after walking for 3 hours I ended up with a fever of 100.4 and was passing out. Later i Gave in to the epidural I felt like I was about to rip faces off. After babys heartbeat was dropping .They informed me I might need an emergency csection. They broke my water and placed a balloon inside me to release pressure off the cord (wrapped around him) thank god his heart stayed strong. (I was put on oxygen) sadly epidural stopped working and I felt everything. I pushed for 51 minutes (i felt when the midwife cut me) soon as he came out the midwife called for NICU as soon as she did people came rushing in and no one was telling me what was wrong . Finally after what seemed a life time I heard my precious baby cry (he came out not breathing and blue) he was born Oct 3rd 10:13pm weighing 8lbs 5oz and 23inch long !
Thank god he is healthy!
You are reading content posted in the Pregnancy: Ages 25-34 Community
Get information and tips on how to help you choose the right place to deliver your baby.
Get the facts on how twins and multiples are formed and your chance of carrying more than one baby at a time.
Learn about the risks and benefits of circumcision.
What to expect during the first hours after delivery.
Learn about early screening and test options for your pregnancy.
Learn about testing and treatment for GBS bacterium.
