***HELP***

[Kaykay2094]

I need advice. I'm 30 weeks pregnant. Due August 26th with a little girl. My boyfriend & I have only been together 8 & a half months. We got pregnant with each other only after month of dating. Decided we would stay together after we found we were pregnant. Since then, our relationship has gone down hill. We have a very abusive relationship. He use to hit me/slap me/ drag me by my hair almost once a week. He hasn't done that lately. Last week he did grab me & start shaking me. He is VERY emotionally & verbally abusive as well. He puts me down all day everyday. On top of that, two weeks ago I found him texting a hooker trying to meet up with her. They never did b/c I caught him & plus he didn't have the money. Swears he's never cheated on me. Plus when I first got pregnant I found out he gave me an STD! We were suppuse to go on vacation before the baby came. He decided to plan a whitewater rafting trip with his friends. When I told him I couldn't go b/c I would be 33 wks pregnant he called me lazy & said I couldn't hack it. The other day he looked it up & realized that I really wouldn't be bale to do it. He said he was still going though! So while I'm at home by myself he gets to go on a action.....does this seem far? I don't trust him to go by himself. I'm scared he will cheat. When I asked him not to go he called me a selfish ****. Which is nothing new. I get called that everyday.
Can I please get some advice on what to do!

[SlavicaTurpin]

Not to sound like a ***** you grew up with out a dad and I grew up with one begging my mom to leave him. Will never forgive her for not leaving him. He was an abusive alcoholic and abused all of us our whole lives. I dont speak to either one of them now but I do resent my mom more than I do him because she never wanted to leave.

[Ebycch]

You deserve better and you can be a great mother leave him or you will have a bad ending..

[RenitaD]

I'm really not being judgmental, but if you re-read everything you wrote. I think it's obvious he's a jerk and he knew you wouldn't be able to go rafting, I'm sure that was his plan all along. Being in an abusive relationship is never good, and a baby is never a reason to stay(if anything thats the reason to leave). I was in a abusive relationship and there are incidents that occurred and I forgot about them, but my Son didn't :-(!! It won't get better people say they'll change but they don't. I thought that man was making me happy and that he truly loved me I was wrong and realized how stupid that sounded. Now I'm in a much better place, happy, safe and kiss are happy. You'll have to see for yourself though, regardless of the advice anyone gives you, it's still your life, but I promise leaving is the best thing for you and your baby..

[Septemberbabygirl]

honey I grew up without a dad too. do you really think it's safe to keep your child around this guy? he slaps you around while your pregnant... I don't think he's gonna change just because your child comes out in the world... And if he doesn't stop and he hits your child someone will see it eventually and that can be a new ball game if dhs gets involved.... sweetie, please think about all the what if's. your in a dangerous relationship it could end bad or good you can make the decision to leave and keep you and your baby safe.

[Septemberbabygirl]

I've been in your situation and I promise it only gets worse!! You said he hits you and puts you down.. ask yourself (and be honest!!) do you think he's gonna stop because you have a kid? do you think he won't treat your child the same way? .... when I was in your situation I asked myself those questions daily. I ended up having a miscarriage because my ex obviously didn't care about our child. I ended up leaving him (when I could actually get away) because I couldn't stand to look at him knowing he was the reason I lost my child.... please sweetheart don't wait till something that bad happens before you decide you had enough! please! You will never forgive yourself... I had my miscarriage in 2010 and I haven't forgiven myself a 100 percent yet... the first chance you get to get out of that situation please do it!! no one should live that way! you deserve better!  I'm sorry your in this situation and I'll pray for you I hope you nothing but the best. :)

[Kaykay2094]

Yes. I have family nearby. My mom knows the situation & wants me to move back in with her.

[daddys_love]

I know how you feel. I grew up without a dad either. That's one of the reasons why I put up all those years with the abuse. But hey, I raised 4 boys by myself after I left his sorry ***. Even if the abuse is verbal, it still hurts and it can still damage you and your baby.

[tracist_3]

Trust me growing up without a dad would be better than that baby watching & hearing possibly FEELING that abuse! You never know with men like him...he might hurt your child! A good father would never act like that towards the women carrying his baby! Please PLEASE leave!

[tracist_3]

Oh honey you don't need to put yourself or that baby through all if that!  No man has the right to put his hands on a women nor speak to her like that! And it could get worse after baby comes & I know you don't want anything to happen to that sweet baby! Do you hv family nearby that you could stay with or friends? If not there are shelters for women you could look into! I'm so sorry you're going through all of that...at this point I wouldn't be to worried if he cheated...I would enjoy the break from his sorry ***! I wish you well & hope you're able to fix your situation before baby comes.

[Kaykay2094]

I'm just scare to leave b/c I grew up without a dad & I know how hard it is. I'm just getting to my breaking point. The physical abuse isn't as bad. It's the verbal I can't handle anymore. It's eveyday I get called a retard or whatever he decides to say.

[daddys_love]

Only cause you're pregnant doesn't mean you have to stay with him. My advice is to please get out while you can. If he still wants to be part of the babys life, that's fine let him, but don't be in a relationship only cause of the baby, trust me it never works. I was in a 10 year relationship, verbally, physically and emotionally abusive, and all that it got me was pregnant over n over. And the abuse just got worse by time. He begged n cried for me not to leave. But if you love yourself and your baby  please leave.