Aa
should I let my bf parents go the hospital when I have my baby.
I over heard my boy friends Dad talking about why does my bf take care of my son that isn't hes. It has upset me . When I git with my bf he understood I'm a package. It took every ounce in me not to act ratchet. And talk shhh to him.now I dont want him around my son or he's first grand daughter! If he feels like that. I take it serious when you talk about my son! It shouldn't of came out he's mouth. Most of all he had no balls to tell me to my face. I had my boyfriend tell he's Dad something but I'm upset. I just wanna cuss him out! I hate putting my biz out but I'm still angry. And wanna confront him! Why was he talking about my son in the first place
Forget all that non sense as long as your boyfriends dad doesn't directly say anything to your face let it be however I would have a conversation with the boyfriend about what you heard and get his input on what he thinks about all that.
I don't know if someone already wrote this since there are so many comments but I don't think you should bring it up to your mans dad in a confrontational way since your boyfriend already addressed it. Instead may be you can explain to him that you guys are a family and both children are siblings and you want them treated equally and from what you over heard him say u have some concerns that he will exclude your son. if so you will not put your son through that since he is a child and will not allow the grandfather in your daughters life since u have to protect your son and raise both kids to view each other as equals.
Yall right :)
gonna come back on him and then that'll stress ur all's relationship. Stay mature. It'll help in the long run. I promise.
LA is pretty right on that. I have a son from a past relationship and my husband's family tends to pick on him. They do it in this weird, playful yet obvious way and my poor son doesn't even realize it. My husband didn't either until I pointed it out. Unfortunately, he has two babies by me (well, one born, the other still fetus) and they ostracize my little one too even tho he's 'blood'. Tell dude it upset u and that u didn't appreciate it. That u understand his concerns for his son but that it's his son's choice. Then, when ur new baby comes, let them do whatever until it becomes apparent that they're blatently playing favorites. If that happens, discuss it with ur bf and give him a chance to do his job anddefend his children/woman. If it gets real bad, say something urself. Just make sure u stay calm, mature and respectful. U can say almost anything to anyone if u do it in the right tone of voice and with the right sort of language. ;) Also, realize that if u go all wiggin out on his 'rents, its
I can imagine it being hard knowing your boyfriend father doesn't support him taking on the role as father to your son but i don't think its a great idea to not let your baby girl see/know her grandparents because they don't accept your son as their grandson. You didn't mention your bf parents treating your son badly but a father voicing his cconcerns for his grown son in private but unfortunately you overheard, what parent wouldn't? In reality your 2yr old is not their flesh n blood and the type of love and care the grandparents will have for your baby girl those can't be forced to be shown to your son. Naturally they will show your baby girl more attention because she will be a part of them.
Your welcome. My opinion comes from own experience ... my dad (step dad) met my mom when he was 26 and she already had 4 kids. His words were and till are ... love ur parter as much as u love her/his kids. Both of my sisters remarried each having 3 kids. It can be done! ;) good luck
Is better that you talk to the granpa: my oldest is now 8 almost 9, my husband is rising him since he was 1 year old, at 2 we moved close to his parents...my son when he started to talk better around 2 1/2 -3 years started calling them granpas: once i was walking behind them when my son called them that their answer to my baby was: don't call me granpa i am not your grandfather!!! I mean there are ways and ways of saying things, same thing came out of my MIL mouth. I got me really depress during a year or so. Who will talk like that to a baby??? So they kept doing the same until one day my son who was i think 4 called her by her name and she turned and said: you don't call me grandma anymore and my son looked at her and said well i thought that you said to me you didn't want me to call you grand ma so thats why i call you by your name...and so she said no call me grandma my son calls her granma and her name, same with FIL granpa and his name. But i wished i did something back then. You should do it and stand for your son. He looses (Fil) not your baby...your baby is amazing and if he doesn't want to get to have an extra grand kid then is his problem. Good luck and don't forget your baby only has you to protect him!!!
7 months going on 8 . Omg thanks for ypur helpful advice! ^_^
And in the mean time have him favorite this new baby? No. How far along are u? Maybe u can talk to him now and see what he says. Maybe things will be better once the baby is here.
I can be a ***** patty lmfao ^.^ and I meant in General not invite them to the hospital! I dont on plan having my bf parents while I have my baby. Weird.:o but it makes me mad how he's Dad talked about my son. Yet I've helped he's parents out! I'm not with playing favorites! Nor talking behind ppls back.espically about a child.
You can't change his mind on it just give it time. Don't play stupid games like forbidding contact. That will cause more problems.
Yeah because you are the mom and he was the one that talked crap he has to do things on ur own terms. Yeah he will be part of ur baby's life always but he shouldn't ve expressed himself like that about ur kid. Yes ur bf told him something but if your STILL angry I would confront the dad and just tell him u heard what he said, that there will be no preference on the kids and if any he won't see the baby until he changes. Again, that's what I would do.
It's messed up he said that about your first baby, but u gotta understand how parents are reluctant to accept girls with "packages." With that being said, that wasn't nice and I would be so upset that I wouldn't want him around.
But you both need to understand neither of you is going away and have to deal with each other because after all he's still your bf's dad.
so your bf has to talk to him and demand respect or tell him if he is going to act like that your kids and u will not be in contact with them (and hope that that works).
At the same time, if your new baby is his grandkid as much as u don't like him he still the grandpa.
My suggestion is that if your bf's parents aren't allowed to go, neither should your parents and let this be just you and your hubby's experience. Just to keep things fair and u don't seem like a _itch.
But for sure, don't allow him in labor. That'd be uncomfortable. Idk. What do u think?
But you both need to understand neither of you is going away and have to deal with each other because after all he's still your bf's dad.
so your bf has to talk to him and demand respect or tell him if he is going to act like that your kids and u will not be in contact with them (and hope that that works).
At the same time, if your new baby is his grandkid as much as u don't like him he still the grandpa.
My suggestion is that if your bf's parents aren't allowed to go, neither should your parents and let this be just you and your hubby's experience. Just to keep things fair and u don't seem like a _itch.
But for sure, don't allow him in labor. That'd be uncomfortable. Idk. What do u think?
Thanks girlys for the helpful advice :) so I should confront he's Dad even tho My boy friend did already ?
I totally agree with ajrain ... Both children should be treated the same with no favorites ... that's how we treat our kids even though my hubby isn't my son's real blood father and I'm not his daughters blood mother I treat her like my son and he treats my son like his daughter and so does our families
I think u should confront the dad because if u ask ur bf yeah he might tell him, but it's his dad, he is not gonna want to hurt him or put him in a uncomfortable situación, but of you tell him he will know you mean serious business and you will be able to say what u want.
Yup I would say no contact if they not treated the same.
To bad for him. His attitude will not allow him to be a part of his granddaughter. Nobody should mess with the kids, they are sacarte!
Even though ur bf dad is being a jerk, I still think they should be allowed to see the grand baby be born. I would confront him though, and let him know there will be no favoritism and both your children. Should be treated equal, blood or not!
I am glad you bf is nice to your son and you.. but that is maddening and I would be just is mad as you. I get defensive too and to me you are being reasonable... talk to you bf tell him you over heard the conversation and they need to accept you and both kids as family or none because there is no picking and choosing is all or none. I am sure he would understand and maybe can explain it to them.
I told my boy friend what I heard and.he.went.to tell he's Dad something. But girly I totally agree with you! What I cant grip is hes dad was talking ugly about my son and being nasty! And I never knew he felt that way! I surprised he would talk about a child! Sets me over the edge
But tell him that if u see any difference in how he treats both of them, there will be no contact until he accepts things how they are.
My opinion ;)
My opinion ;)
U said you had to tell your bf to say something to his dad right? You shouldn't have to tell him what to say, he should've responded right away defending you and your kid. Apparently ur bfs dad doesn't agree and might not agree. But he can accept. How is he around ur 2 year old?. I would confront him (the dad) and demand respect for ur kid and if he wants to be involved with the baby he needs to accept u and with the kid. If u see that he treats the baby better and ignores the kid u should not let him see the baby until he changes.
You are reading content posted in the Pregnancy: Ages 25-34 Community
Get information and tips on how to help you choose the right place to deliver your baby.
Get the facts on how twins and multiples are formed and your chance of carrying more than one baby at a time.
Learn about the risks and benefits of circumcision.
What to expect during the first hours after delivery.
Learn about early screening and test options for your pregnancy.
Learn about testing and treatment for GBS bacterium.
