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Due to be steralised but want another baby

Hi, I'm 32 and decided a few months ago I didn't want to have anymore children. I have a son 10 and daughter who's 5 and couldn't be happier...  I have BPD and am on Depakote, which is dangerous to the fetus,  sertraline and am doing 12 months skills for living therapy as well as high blood pressure, pressure type 2 diabetes and a cyst on muscle ovary that's been there for 3 years. Anyhow as the heading says I'm on the waiting list for a tubal sterilisation but I'd love to be pregnant again. Only thing is my husband is dead against it. After having my dd I had bad pnd that ended up becoming BPD and my husband said I won't cope with another. Plus he doesn't want the responsibility of having a newborn again. I know his right deep down. Any advice anyone?
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