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Avatar universal

PMS or PREGNANT?

Please help me I gave my boyfriend a b-/j and he put it in only one time  really quick in my v and pull it out, after that, he waited and then came, this was 2 days before the day of my period. I know I should take a preg test but since it was so close to my period and it was only in for seconds even if he pre ejac, the pre ejac must have been interrupted cause it was real quick. Now I'm 3 days late, and have very irresistible PMS, very painful, plus I feel like watery vaginal discharge coming out instead of blood. This is the second time I'm late with this same PMS symptoms, the first time, we had sex and it was in for seconds as well, we mostly play, and my period got late and I had the same symptoms, like the watery discharge and it was painful as well. But I'm scared cause this time he came after he pull out and even though it was for a little time I know I should do it protected but we don't do it that much like I said we only play but I've read these are as well preg symptoms, since its the second time I'm late with the very same PMS symptoms and all, I think is the worry and stress that are getting me late like the last time, I was 2 days late, this time I'm 3 days late. What do yo think? Can I take a blood test in any clinic? is it to soon, I'm preety sure is cause my period is near. HELP!
15 Responses
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1194973 tn?1385503904
It's common for men (especially teenage and younger men) to leave when the female is pregnant or soon after the baby is born. This is why many of us on this forum stress to think about the person you're with, and that after children are born it brings a lot of stress to a relationship--even in the most stable of them.

I don't think it really has to do with men and women being different. (Heaven knows I've seen my own share of females who should never have children, or women who use abortion as birth control) I think it's mostly due to maturity. My husband is 24 (25 this Sept) and was 23 when I was pregnant with our daughter--so slightly older than your partner. Sure he was depressed for a few weeks, I was too. Neither of us really wanted kids, but knew that having unprotected sex it would happen eventually. He works as hard as he can to provide for us both, and gives me the ability to stay home with our daughter.

I really wouldn't put too much thought into the what if's or anything yet though. Not until you know for sure what's actually going on. However, he has at least shown you his true colours, and it's better that it happen now when the risk of pregnancy is as low as it is, rather than in the future if/when you actually would get pregnant.
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Avatar universal
Whit him it's pretty much over, he definitely does not want me.love me, he still want me to have an abortion since i.bleeding is so uncommon he does not believes in it. He literally told me: "You are getting and abortion and done, leave me alone, I don't want nothing to do with you I don't want to be with you". Apparently cause I'm some sort of a "show maker" or give thing a turn out of proportion or something like that like if I enjoyed creating a circus, but I mean, this is pretty stressful for me to take it alone when he did it with me, his attitude is wrong, a guy that tells that to a woman even as a result of him not being able to deal with the stress of the situation, as it is, can't possibly love her. He was like, I'm not gonna f..*..k my life cause of you.

I had to tell him that if he decided to get lost or something when the baby was born he was gonna get a citation from court to at least give his name to the bby, and that if he did not do it after a dna he can get pretty much arrested and then he like change his attitude. When I guy does not want a baby of his with a woman it's cause he doesn't love her, or maybe he's very immature and ignorant since he's 20, he is only thinking about his party life getting over and about having to give all the party and bragging about material stuff like shoes, perfumes, cars and money to fulfill the bby's expenses. I don't know I don't wanna know about him I'm way to hurt why would he not love my baby like I would love anything that comes from him, I would love to be the mother of his child. Maybe women and men are very different about that or something cause it does not make sense to me. Thanks again I'll come back with a result to post in like a week or so you've been tremendous help!!

Helpful - 0
1654035 tn?1332425178
I really hope everything works out well for you! It is hard to talk to people about this kindof stuff and this forum makes it much easier to talk about what you are thinking, especially when you can get people here who have been through as much as all of us have.
This is definatly the kind of experience that will let you know what your guy is all about. And Clysta is right, you should be able to talk to him about this and be in agreance of what you want if you are having sex---if you cant agree on this kindof stuff your future is going to be rocky and probably not work out. I hate to say that but i know from experience.
Let me know what is going on and how this all works out!
Helpful - 0
1194973 tn?1385503904
Implantation bleeding isn't actually bleeding. It's spotting. Generally, it will last 1-2 days max, and will only be seen when using the bathroom. It's a brownish, punk or red colour and shouldn't require use of feminine products. You have to consider the size of the egg implanting. It's smaller than a period at the end of a sentence. It's not going to cause massive amounts of blood, let alone any flow at all. It's also uncommon. Only around 30% of women will ever have it.

You should really sit down and talk to your partner, and find out his view on children, what he wants and thinks. It's very possible you two won't make it as a couple if you're not on the same page. However communication is key, and that's the only way you'll figure anything out. Good luck to you.
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Avatar universal
Thanks I just got my period I THINK because, how do i know it is not the implantation bleeding? I had sex past Monday, my period always starts and ends brownish and last about 3-5 days like the implantation bleeding from what I've read  but this is exactly how it was the first time it got late as well.

I guess I'll just have to wait one more week, and be patient, the moment I relaxed and stop thinking about it was the moment I finally "got my period" if it;s not the i.b.

I wont ever do it without protection, for me, because it's really easy for them to leave us and say it's our problem maybe this had to happen just to let me know who he really is after all this years.I know him since I was 17 now I'm 21 and he's been my one and only, and it hurts me to move on with this horrible impression. He basically told me to abort and leave him alone, and I'm really broken I don't understand how can a person kill something that's so genuinely theirs? I've heard of women that had tons of abortions like 4 or 5 and it's like nothing for them but I once met one who wanted to commit suicide after she did it cause she could not forgive herself, If I'm pregnant I really don't want to kill my baby and I'm sure I'll end up like her if I do it, killing my baby would destroy me.

So I'll give it another week like u guys said and post if I'm neg or positive in case someone is passing through the same thing although it really depends on the person cause I just discovered we women are all different.

Thanks very much to both of you I really did not have anyone to tell what is happening to me, without getting more hurt.
Helpful - 0
1194973 tn?1385503904
The soonest any test can be taken is 2 weeks after sex (and 4 seconds or not, what you had was sex). However, in this instance I really doubt you're pregnant. PCOS is infamous in causing irregular periods, or having you get none at all.

You really shouldn't worry until you know for sure if you are or not. I would also consider your relationship with your partner. What if in the future you DO get pregnant and he wants you to abort. I've seen guys that make the female choose between him or the baby. Abortion isn't the answer, and if he (or you) don't want children you need to use protection at all times.  
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Avatar universal
One last thing since I have to wait for the test, I read about the polycystic ovary syndrome, and I once had a cyst when I was like 17 and I did not wanted the Dr. to see me,  so he send me to take a sonogram(not trustful in this cases) and he saw a little cyst but said it was no problem. I've always experienced Pms  but used to have regular period. When I become 15 I started to grow facial hair this was the reason why I went to the dr, I still fight with this facial hair problem and I began to notice that when I was being penetrated It was really painful, I don't know why, I thought it was ok since like people said when you don't use the v kinda close again, or something like that, so I guess I'll have to do the pregnancy test and if negative,I should go to the dr again right? What I don't get is why my period got late the only two times i got pe...even if it was only one once in a month.
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Avatar universal
I guess I'll just need to accept it right? Thanks for all of your help.
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Avatar universal
I am also experimenting diarrhea in the dawn 2 am or 4  am, this is the second day with that I've droped pounds, but this is also a pms sign but no menstruation, is there a faster way to know if I am pregnant, like the blood test I've heard i can take it from the 3rd day on, an there's 1 brand in Walgreens that says something about that as well. I'm really desperate.
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Avatar universal
Thanks u did not scared me I was already like this I've read so much and google so much that I don't know what to think. I have not met any woman in a dayly basis that have had this symptoms so quickly and told me that if it were that easy every girl would know if they are pregnant, but in the internet appears to be really common to have this symptoms so quickly but also they appears as PMS.

Thanks for your disposition to help me. I really appreciate it I'm turning down my computer now to try and think about other stuff and see if it comes down. Thanks again.
Helpful - 0
1654035 tn?1332425178
First thing you need to do is try to relax. Go and buy a home pregnancy test and take it with your first morning urine. How you had sex makes it much less likely you are pregnant but I wanted you to know it is not impossible to get pregnant that way. And yes you are right, having sex right before your period lowers your odds because you should have ovulated several days before this and be past your most fertile days. with all that said, go and take a home pregnancy test just to be sure, but you need to take it 2-3 weeks after having sex or your test will not be accurate. You are not along you are just in a scary place because having a baby is extremely challenging but if you had to you would make it work, and parents might be upset but parents always love their children.
Sorry if I scared you but i wanted you to understand that what you were doing can lead to pregnancy so you need to protect yourself and use a condom, take the pill or not have penetration.
stress does lead to delays in periods and you are definatly stressing from the sounds of your messages.
discharge is not uncommon and many women have this pregnant or not pregnant.
Let me know if you need anything else, you can always message me.
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Avatar universal
I'm so not prepared he just told me to get an abortion. I'm really scared he's been my only one clearly all this time he was just enjoying the time I don't get how, when he can go and have a real time instead of a one second quicky sex time with me, but I guess that just my fault.

My parents will def throw me out. Is there any place I can go until I stabilize and get a job, I don't have 1 cause I'm finishing my BA I'm 10 courses away but since it's psychology I'll need a Master to practice( I was going to do it in I/O psych). Is it that impossible to study with a child?

I don't want to get rid of the baby cause I don't believe in abortion I definetley will love my baby, it will destroy me for the rest of my life to get an abortion or give him in adoption. Anyone in here have had to get one done? I know we both can die, what would be the more secure way? Just to know cause I really don't know what to do.

I don't know a lot of people and l will def have to leave my home and my parents, I don't want them to know cause it will destroy them even more than if i just leave maybe with time I can call them.

So I'm basically alone. Anyone has been in a similar place I really need an advice and I'm way too depressed to think right.

Thanks for ur time
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Avatar universal
The v discharge is clear and white, the first time I was late, after that discharge my period came the other day like if it was cleaning the way. But I've been having the discharge since yesterday I don't know thanks I guess I have such a luck.
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Avatar universal
Thanks for ur quick response I'm very stress out and depress like the first time I'm really regular so that is why I am so scared. I was not expecting to do it it just happened and I did not even enjoyed it I guess such is life, we did it past Monday(20) I was waiting my period to come the 22. If the first time that happened I had the same symptoms maybe it could be the stress more than the real possibility of being preg?, I've read that the possibility is 2% if you do it two days before you period. I did not do it knowing that, I did not planned it cause we were having problems. Thank you very much for your quick response, can anyone else say something? Did you felt this when u got pregnant? The v discharge is clear and white, the first I was light after that discharge my period came the other day like if it was cleaning the way. But I've been having the discharge since yesterday I don't know thanks I guess I have such a luck.
Helpful - 0
1654035 tn?1332425178
It could be stress that will delay your period sometimes. How many days has it been since you had sex! I think it's been 6 days? If I'm right it's too early to know if your pregnant you need to wait at least 2 weeks. Just so you know what you are doing is having sex, one quick time is penetration and that is how you get pregnant! Pre-*** can get you pregnant and him penetrating is bring sperm right to where your eggs are, so know every time you do this even quick or once you are on your way to pregnancy hope your ready!! Good luck!
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