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Baby Shower for Baby#2..Is it taboo?
SO my close friends, my mom, and my sister all think I should have a small intimate baby shower. with about 20-25 people max. I have a son who is 5 1/2 (will be 6 in Nov). I kinda think it's a lil taboo to have another one. They think I'd be missing out if I didn't have one. We don't have anything from my previous pregnancy so we'd have to start all over. I have this thing about me. I don't want to burden anyone with having to worry about buying me a crib, or changing table/dresser, or travel system. etc. I feel like it's the parents responsibility to buy the big necessities. Besides, I want what I want without having people thin it's too expensive or why do I have that on my registry...My mom says, we can still buy the big stuff and let the guests buy the little stuff that are inexpensive. She says people will be relieved if all the big stuff is off the registry and they will be willing to get all the little necessities..I'm torn IDK..We would still have to pay for the baby shower (whether it's small or not) that also is an expense. No one is offering to throw me one they are just telling me to have one.... What do you ladies think?
COMMUNITY LEADER
LOL...You made me laugh....I would NEVER have a baby shower if I already had everything I needed. You're right tho, I do know some ladies who have. I (THANK GOD) am FAR from snotty...hehe.. I didn't even want to have a baby shower b/c I didn't want to put the burden on anyone. Everyone around me just keeps saying I should and we really have NOTHING left from JJ. At the time I thought I was DONE with kids...lol. go figure) Jason and I are taking care of the big things like the crib, crib mattress, travel system, dresser, high chair, swing, bedding, Glider etc. I actually registered at Walmart for everything else. I only put the basic essentials on the registry so when people look they will see that the most expensive item on my registry is the walker ($60) If they don't buy it then I'll buy it. We just figured whatever we get, it would definitely help the pockets. I am a stay at home mom and my husband is "the bread winner" of the family. We just bought our 1961 ranch that we've been renovating so anything to help ease his stress of buying for the baby ya know... It will be an intimate shower at my house with close friends and family. I only have 25 people on the list. If 25 people just bring diapers, that's good enough for me. lol.... Every lil bit helps:)
I think it depends entirely on WHY you're having another shower.
If your next child is 5 years or older, or you're having a baby of another gender, I think it's not only OK it's very SMART to have another baby shower.
However, some people do it for rude reasons..my BIL/SIL had a shower for their 2nd because they still had all of their furniture but they didn't want their 2nd to have "hand- me-downs" but couldn't afford new stuff themselves...I thought that was just plain snotty. My son went right into the exact same crib and furniture as my daughter....and her stuff wasn't even new when we bought it...and now baby #3 will go right into the same furniture.
BUT....all of our stuff was gender neutral AND out of all 3 babies, my oldest JUST turned 3 years old...so we still have every single baby item, lol, we didn't get rid of any of it...everyone kept saying I should have one because our 2nd baby was a different gender but I just laughed and said "save the money and buy me diapers instead" and they did - didn't have to buy diapers for MONTHS!
So..if you feel like you need it, or you feel like you want it to celebrate the new baby..have at it. If you want more stuff...or you want to be snotty...I'd say avoid it, because people are going to notice and they'll be offended (I don't mean "you" specifically...this is just the advice I would give to anyone, I don't think you're being snotty at all <3 )
But since you aren't being snotty or selfish...um, go for it girl!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
If your next child is 5 years or older, or you're having a baby of another gender, I think it's not only OK it's very SMART to have another baby shower.
However, some people do it for rude reasons..my BIL/SIL had a shower for their 2nd because they still had all of their furniture but they didn't want their 2nd to have "hand- me-downs" but couldn't afford new stuff themselves...I thought that was just plain snotty. My son went right into the exact same crib and furniture as my daughter....and her stuff wasn't even new when we bought it...and now baby #3 will go right into the same furniture.
BUT....all of our stuff was gender neutral AND out of all 3 babies, my oldest JUST turned 3 years old...so we still have every single baby item, lol, we didn't get rid of any of it...everyone kept saying I should have one because our 2nd baby was a different gender but I just laughed and said "save the money and buy me diapers instead" and they did - didn't have to buy diapers for MONTHS!
So..if you feel like you need it, or you feel like you want it to celebrate the new baby..have at it. If you want more stuff...or you want to be snotty...I'd say avoid it, because people are going to notice and they'll be offended (I don't mean "you" specifically...this is just the advice I would give to anyone, I don't think you're being snotty at all <3 )
But since you aren't being snotty or selfish...um, go for it girl!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
COMMUNITY LEADER
What struck me was the big girl panties line...Are you a Housewives Fan???
COMMUNITY LEADER
Not yet but I just requested you so we can be friends now..LOL
Lol! Thanks MrsPincince. Are we friends yet? Cuz if we're not we should be! Lol!
COMMUNITY LEADER
I agree with Steph 100%:)
Fearsome....Personally I'd invite them, they can always say no, not show, send a gift, or show & have a good time! Since your not close you won't feel bad if they don't come, it'll be they're issue if they make a deal out of it, not yours. They just need to wear their big girl panties & be adult. ;)
I agree with PPs. If you treat it as a celebration of your little one -- no one can fault you! Maybe leave off the "registered at..." kind of info. Then the people who want to buy something can always ask, but it won't be like you're pushing for gifts...
my sister wants to throw me a shower too and here's my question... I work in a dept of maybe 25 people and I am so far thinking of just inviting the women I am close to. But then that leaves out only a few (maybe 5 or 6). I don't want to exclude them, of course, but I felt funny about inviting them since we're not super close (although I have worked here for 12 years) because I don't want it to seem like I am asking for gifts. Would you invite them and assume they can always say they can't make it ... and that way it doesn't feel exclusionary or not invite them and assume they just "get it" ??? I should also say that we usually do something in the office for expecting parents (both female and male), so they'll already be included in that... thoughts?
my sister wants to throw me a shower too and here's my question... I work in a dept of maybe 25 people and I am so far thinking of just inviting the women I am close to. But then that leaves out only a few (maybe 5 or 6). I don't want to exclude them, of course, but I felt funny about inviting them since we're not super close (although I have worked here for 12 years) because I don't want it to seem like I am asking for gifts. Would you invite them and assume they can always say they can't make it ... and that way it doesn't feel exclusionary or not invite them and assume they just "get it" ??? I should also say that we usually do something in the office for expecting parents (both female and male), so they'll already be included in that... thoughts?
I've got a 10 year old and we've been trying for 6 years and I've had 3 miscarriages....I'm having a big ol' PARTY! Lol!
COMMUNITY LEADER
lol...thank you...That actually sounds good. DH and I discussed it and we pretty much came up to the same conclusion. Buy the big stuff on our own and by the time the baby shower comes around, people will see the registry only has all the small and practical everyday things left...So onward and forward with my baby shower in February:)
Sorry foe the double post!
Every baby should be celebrated. If you feel awkward about a list don't have one or leave off the big stuff and just let family who want to chip in on the big stuff do so.
When we got married we had no wedding list, we just let anyone who asked know that we would be grateful for gift certificates to the local DIY store as we wanted to do some reno's to our home once we were married.
You could do the same for a baby shower or ask for things like diapers in all sizes wipes etc; pratical stuff.
When we got married we had no wedding list, we just let anyone who asked know that we would be grateful for gift certificates to the local DIY store as we wanted to do some reno's to our home once we were married.
You could do the same for a baby shower or ask for things like diapers in all sizes wipes etc; pratical stuff.
Every baby should be celebrated. If you feel awkward about a list don't have one or leave off the big stuff and just let family who want to chip in on the big stuff do so.
When we got married we had no wedding list, we just let anyone who asked know that we would be grateful for gift certificates to the local DIY store as we wanted to do some reno's to our home once we were married.
You could do the same for a baby shower or ask for things like diapers in all sizes wipes etc; pratical stuff.
When we got married we had no wedding list, we just let anyone who asked know that we would be grateful for gift certificates to the local DIY store as we wanted to do some reno's to our home once we were married.
You could do the same for a baby shower or ask for things like diapers in all sizes wipes etc; pratical stuff.
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