Pregnancy: Feb 2015 Babies Community
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Avatar universal

Family helping

this is my first baby and a lot of family members want to help us out when it comes to baby gear. Basically I feel guilty with everyone volunteering to help, basically I feel like I can't provide. I don't make a lot of money with my job and my bf doesn't make a lot and he pays the bills and everything adds up. Anyone ever feel this way? Please don't judge too hard.
5 Responses
Avatar universal
Avatar universal
I know how you feel. And it's an awful feeling. You want so badly to be able to do everything on your own and provide all the luxuries in the world for your baby, but it is so hard. And it hurts when you can't. It took me a long time to realize that it's hard for everyone, it wasn't just me. And that it's ok to accept help.
If your family is offering, and happy to help, take it. If you're uncomfortable, tell them you'd feel better if they threw a baby shower for you. That way, it's a one time thing, people won't be showing up dropping stuff off or taking you shopping. A baby shower is a celebration, it's a party. Also, a lot of baby gear is unnecessary. They're luxury items and you can do without a lot of it. But, it's nice to have. All you really need are clothes, diapers and wipes, somewhere for baby to sleep, and if you're not nursing bottles and formula.
You could also tell your very helpful family you'd really appreciate it if they helped you or around the house, fixing dinners, caring for the baby, things like that while you adjust to your new life instead of giving gifts.
You don't have to accept material gifts. But it's a blessing you have family who wants to help you and I think you should accept it in whatever way makes you feel most comfortable.
Avatar universal
No just let them help if they want to help. I'm sure they know what ur going thru and just want to make sure you have what you need for the baby. My husband is the only one working and his job is shutting down for 3 weeks and it's crazy cause it's all happening when the baby will be here and we just moved. But my family has helped a lot! I don't know what I would so with out them helping me I don't think I would have what I need without them. So just tell them thank you and be greatful that they want to help! :)
9240076 tn?1408491932
Appreciate it hun, take it as you'll have money to buy your own personal things for her. The paternal grandmother hasn't done a thing for my baby girl, not even buy a pack of diapers. My mother's side of the family is Indian and have a very traditional view on marriage and babies, not to mention we're Christians. And though when i first told them I'm pregnant out of wedlock they were all very upset, disappointed, they're all doing everything for my little girl. My grandma's knitting booties and hats and mittens and scarves and sweaters. My mom has paid for every single thing my little has. They're excited! Just like your family!  :)
Avatar universal
Thanks for the help ladies! I am grateful they volunteer to help us out I just don't want them to think little of us. And I mean that by not being able to afford much. I guess because some people in my family made me feel that way. I know that soon things will be a whole lot different.
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