need to vent!!!

[WillzMom]

OK, hubby has 2 teenage daughters who live away. Since they've gotten older they never wanted to come spend the summers with us anymore, until... Step mom gets pregnant. Cool right, wrong! They began acting out during my pregnancy. The oldest even told her mom she wasn't happy about the new baby. They've been here a week. Baby is 3 weeks, nursing, and I'm still adjusting, hell we're still adjusting to the baby. I guess it would be fine if they showed interest in her, but they don't. They don't help out, offer to hold her, play with her, they don't even look at her. Then I don't feel comfortable leaving the baby unattended to shower or cook dinner because I fear, irrationally I'm sure, that one of them will hurt her. I just feel like it was bad timing. They could have come for a weekend but not an extended stay. I'm not mentally up for the challenge. But I couldn't tell my husband no. He's so happy that they are here. And I feel like a bad person, but I really just rather be alone than have extra bodies that make me feel uneasy in my own home with my newborn. I just needed to express that.

[2015Harmony]

That's hard.Not only a new baby, lack of sleep, still crazy hormones, nursing but now trying to keep neutral ground w his older girls. How old are his 2 older girls? Really it's new to them, they don't know what to think. I'm sure they wanted to come bcuz they think they're going to be replaced. That's normal whether siblings are 2 or 16. Plus if you don't have a open/communicative relationship w them You'll have a harder time getting through. Express that to Ur husband that u think they may be having a hard time adjusting to the new baby maybe he can figure it out. It's a lil different but my son was 5 when I had baby 2, he had nightmares my whole pregnancy-he thought I was going to forget him at school/store etc. it took time for him to see this new baby was his buddy. We talked to him, I made extra time for him. Maybe try to do 1 on 1 time w his girls-take them for ice cream or something they like. Just an hr, between feedings.

When I had my 1st born I was VERY close w my best friends son, I practically raised him. He went everywhere w me, he was my buddy since he was 1 (I got prego when he was 4). When I told every1 I was prego he stormed out of the room. When I brought the baby over he was NOT happy, he wanted me to leave him in the car, didn't like the name etc. my girlfriend & I went into the kitchen (we could still hear/see & the newborn was in his car seat) and when I wasn't in the room he talked to him, touched his toes, told the baby he had cars they could share.... But as soon as I walked in the room he didn't "like" the baby. So maybe, give them a lil space so they can see how sweet their new lil sister is. Still be in an ear reach where U can hear and the baby is in a safe place, swing bouncer etc.
I just had baby 3, I also have a 20month old. I don't call the newborn "baby", I call him by name or tell the older kids "look at Ur lil brother". I think it helps

[WillzMom]

They are 12 and 16. I have talked to hubby and let him know my fears. So when he is home he takes time to have them all around the baby, but they still show very little interest. Maybe I'm hard headed but I feel like at their age I don't need to pacify their insecurities. When I was 12 I became an auntie and was very proud the minute my niece was introduced to me! But then again maybe I'm just too darn tired to pacify their insecurities, lol!!! Thanks for your response, maybe next week will be easier. I will try to include them more in my daily dealings with the baby.