Hi there everyone:)

[Serene71]

Has anyone experienced this and does anyone have any advice-I am 35 weeks along today..living with the father of the baby up until 2 weeks ago when I found he has cheated on me possibly up to June. I asked him to leave and he is staying at his work in a 'sleep room' with his clothes. He says he wants to work things out but right now I am just concentrating on getting ready for the baby, getting excited. He wants to be involved in the delivery room also but I'm not making any promises...any words of wisdom, advice? I am managing to keep busy with family and friends so that when I think about what happened I don't have much time to let it get me down..

PS we are having a girl :)

[JoyRenee]

Nicole- that is typical of many men, even men who were originally excited and involved. They kind of shut down. I almost think men "regress" much like older siblings can regress when a new baby is on the way. Give him time!

[nicole179]

i agree that if he wants to be involved for the birth, then he should be there.  it is unfortunate the situation you are having to deal with right now.  i am kinda on the other end of the spectrum.  i've been with BF for 5.5 yrs. and we're due october 18.  i have been so disappointed with his lack of support during this pregnancy, it's the first for us both, we seem to barely have anything left between us anymore and i guess i had hoped our son would give him the kick in the but he needs to get off the couch and wake up to his/our life, and me, since he was the one who really pushed to go through with the pregnancy when i found out and i was unsure simply due to our deteriorating relationship. he doesn't know if he wants to see the birth, says he can't handle that kind of stuff.  i had envisioned a natural birth with a supportive partner who would be there to encourage and love me. unfortunatly we don't always get what we want!!  lately i've been so upset and feeling so lonely in our relationship that i can't sleep!! i'm exhausted only getting a couple hours of sleep a night, but i just can't turn off my head. i keep wondering if i should leave, or wait to see what he is like after our son is born. you're lucky in the fact that you are able to get through this time with family and friends!!  but ultimatly it is up to YOU about who is in the delivery room, and if you guys are on okay terms and you are not physically or emotionally disturbed in his presence, then you should consider having him there.  on the other hand, if it is a really hard for you to be in the same room as him then maybe he shouldn't be there.  i would say just take a look at your motives before you make a final decision.  is the decision based on pay back, would be a good place to start, i would think.

[JoyRenee]

He should be allowed to see his daughter being born. It doesn't mean he's invited back home, but it is his child and he has a right to be there for her birth. ;-) Hard situation to be in and I hope that with time comes forgiveness for the sake of your little girl!

[April_Baby]

Just because he cheated on you doesn't mean he should be deprived of seeing his little girl born. I hear this all the time, women with children. Just because he did you wrong, why should he have to pay the consequences of not being involved. I think it's a beautiful thing of him wanting to be involved in the baby life. Count your blessing!