:(

[daisymay61710]

i have a question . and im really confused what should i do.. ive been married for  year and lived with my husband 3 .. our marriage hasnt been perfect but it kimda was i became pregnant amd everything changed.. he started ignoring me call me a **** bag and etc i tried to be not so mean over leaving but this is really hurtfull..  he started saying baby wasnt his that i was a mistake..  so i have thought of getting a divorce.. but then i think what if what if im doing the wrong thing little advice.. please. i feel so alone in this amd all he does is say i stay for money and its not even that.. i wanted a family but i guess he doesn't

[littleoleladywholivedinashoe]

No one encouraged her to stay, but simply speak to him or a marriage counselor. It amazes me how people are so quick to end relationships, without thinking of the child/children caught in the middle of the situation. As she stated, he just started being a butthead. So perhaps, he could be going through a rough time with the expectation of becoming a father. So to prevent another fatherless child being raised in the world, along with so many other kids or other single moms struggling to care for a kid that they didn't create alone, the BEST advice provided was to talk it through, work it out & if that fails remove herself until things change. Now ladies should be very careful giving advice based on how THEY feel when they aren't in the same perdictament. Also, before replying thoroughly read through the question being asked, as well as, be able to fully comprehend the replies made by others. With that being said good day to ALL!!!!!

[Chima7]

I could never encourage a woman to stay with a man who is verbally and mentally abusing her. Verbal and mental abuse can be just as damaging as physical abuse and it's also a very toxic environment for children to be raised like that. A mother needs to protect her children from anyone and everyone including the father if he is in any way verbally, mentally or physically abusive.

It's only worth the time and effort to work things out if he is a decent guy and the argument was just a one off. But if you're dealing with him abusing you on a constant daily basis, then it's time to start taking some action to preserve your self esteem and hopefully that of your kids as well. There is no reason for you to stay in such an unhealthy environment and in fact it would be worse for your kids if you stayed.

[littleoleladywholivedinashoe]

Honestly...probably over half of these women are in no way, shape or form to suggest a divorce if they haven't gotten to the wife status. There are too many girlfriends or baby mamas who are in messed up situations to understand yours. You don't give in like that, a marriage is a UNION that isn't always rosy. I would only consider leaving if there were physical abuse. Talk to him about it, let him know how you feel, if that doesn't work take a break and try again later. There's is always miserable women who want to see other women miserable as well. I hope that you can find some comfort in your time of need.

[LoveCake98]

I'm puzzled by your story.  Didn't you discuss whether you both wanted children prior to getting married?  Has he changed his mind?  If so that'd be a deal breaker for me. I'd schdule some marital counseling immediately and if he won't go then you have your answer.

Name calling cannot be tolerated. Fighting fair is the only way to maintain a marriage.  If it has deteriorated that quickly--within 1 year you can & should consider leaving. Don't spend your life with the wrong male role model for your child.  It will only get more complicated and you don't deserve it.

[littleoleladywholivedinashoe]

If I may address your question...Only you & your husband can answer that...All I can add is, that I, myself have seen a change in the way my husband also, I guessing it could be that he worried about being a father again. I think sometimes men end up just as emotional as we are when we're pregnant. I'm choosing to take breaks from him when he's being a butthead, but if it continues after the baby is here, it time to reevaluate where we stand. I've also considered getting a divorce, as well, but it just seems to drastic for something so minor. If you like to talk I'm here...

[TeamFinnigan]

You and your baby deserve better than that. Right now you need as little stress as possible and being in a toxic relationship is not good for you or baby. I wouldn't try to go through a divorce while your pregnant, because that may add more stress but you definitely need to get away from him until you deliver. Best of luck in whatever you decide.

[ashley3232]

Wow he is horrible!!!  You need to get out of there! Dont ever believe that you have to put up with that!

[jessi_te]

Honey I'm so sorry for you. I wish I could tell you it will all be ok. But I can't. Just follow your heart. If your first thought was divorce then maybe you should just talk to a lawyer and see your options. I pray it ask works out for you abd your little bundle.