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Avatar universal

Am I right to be annoyed?

I'm 34 weeks pregnant and not with the dad and Wasn't a planned pregnancy as was taking the pill.
I have stayed good friends with the dad so far, despite him not wanting to come to the first scan, and he hasn't been involved in getting anything ready for his sons arrival besides come by to the second scan and giving me some money to buy some baby things.
I asked him a few months ago if he was coming to the birth because I really want him there and he said yes. But last week he said I need to take a birthing partner with me too because he doesn't want to do 'labour stuff like holding my hand or patting my back because that's a couple thing' and said that he doesn't know if he's going to stay in the room when I'm actually giving birth. I'm feeling upset that although this wasn't a planned baby, he was happy for us to sleep together whilst not in a relationship but he doesn't want to help me during the pregnancy/labour because you only do that when in a relationship. He says he's looking forward to being a dad and will help more when he's born. I don't want him to be there as my partner, but I thought he would at least be there for me as the father and as my friend.
Sorry for the rant
2 Responses
973741 tn?1342346373
Hi there.  I understand what you are saying and how you feel.  I do.  But I can also see his point.  Giving birth is very intimate.  He wants to be there for the baby but would like you to bring someone for YOU.  And giving birth is really hard to do and is also really hard to watch.  It's beautiful and not so pretty at the same time.  And he may be worried about that.  I think a lot of men are.  When I was born, men never went into the delivery rooms!  There are so many crummy dads out there, that he wants to be there for his child is a good thing.  So, at least he has that going for him.  I'd bring someone to support you and it will be gravy if he can get himself together to be in the room to see his new baby from the first moment he can and cut the cord.  good luck hon
Avatar universal
Thank you for the reply, I appreciate it x
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