I hate my husban!

[Sandysweets]

Sorry for venting a lil bit here, but I think I really do hate him. I feel love for him sometimes. We have a 2yr old son, and I'm 36 wks with the girl, but we have already separated once long story. Now we are back together again its been a year. He is Sooo mean to me but since he was worse before he thinks he is way better to me now. He isn't he is soo verbally abusive, he tells me Im so fat and disgusting, I'm a hoe, just last night told me he wished I died giving birth. Broke my heart. And just now I told him I'm so tired of fighting every single freaken day, I just can't do it anymore and since it was me who left him the first time nd took my son with me. He said he could care less. I said maybe u just shouldn't be at the birth this time...he laughed in my face and said I wasn't planing on it anyway. I know the obvious answer is leave him and believe me if I could I would go right now. But I'm stuck like an idiot didnt save money all the money is in one acct. I'm not working, and my family cant help. I feel so alone. And can't talk to anyone because the fam that I do have all are church goers, and I was too but I guess I stopped going so now I'm the black sheep. Sorry long post but I'm so sad I have this not in my thought and wanna cry. :(

[Hmph16]

My bf told me he wished I died in childbirth when we were fighting one time it broke my heart how can someone be so ugly

[RockRose]

Sandy,  I'm curious about what context he says these awful things in.  Are they just totally out of the blue,  or are these things said in the middle of a verbal knife fight the two of you are having?

You say you're so tired of fighting,  every single day - so it sounds like these things are said during an ugly unnecessary fight.

If this is the case,  this is usually fixable.  Couples can get in the habit of pushing each other's buttons,  and they get really good at knowing right where to punch that hurts the most,  and they use that skill as a defense to stop being hurt themselves in an argument.

This may well be salvagable,  if you both learn to argue fairly when it's necessary,  and stop getting locked in battle when it doesn't care.  It's a good sign that he's a good father to your son.

[3rdNdone]

Loving someone doesn't make you stupid. You have feelings and are human.

[Sandysweets]

Thank u ladies so much for ur comments. Ur right stop making excuses and start taking action :).I'm scared believe it or not the unknown of it all so stressful too, but I guess what dosent kill me hopefully will make me "smarter" and I won't repeat the stupid same mistake again :)

[JVerdugo]

Ask your family for help.  He's not normal.  Normal husbands do not say things like that even when angry. Your children will see and hear the way he treats you and that will affect the way they grow up and treat their SO's. Get out now,  don't wait.  Good luck.

[susamor]

If he isnt being physically abusive, you can overcome his emotional abuse. Don't play along. If he insults you, don't do or say something he can blame you for. That way he doesn't think he has an excuse for his wrong behavior. Also, focus on your kids and yourself. When the time is right, you'll make the best decision for you and your kids.  Sorry you're going through this. You deserve better.  

[Shal2]

You could always leave and put him on child support and alimony if he took care of you and agreed since you were pregnant because the unnecessary stress is not helpful but venting and sharing really helps to let it out and not keep it in. I hope you find peace because the feeling of being stuck and thinking you have nowhere to go is not a good feeling especially with your emotions all over the place. Try staying away from here you and you child sleeping together and avoiding him as much as you can and try to get money and save without him knowing.

[3rdNdone]

If your family are church goers it makes more that they would take you in when you need it most. I hope you can get you and your child out of that environment. I'm sorry that you feel stuck, talk to your family and call some shelters, all shelters aren't the same some allow you and your  child to share a room.
I hope that everything works out for you and your child.

[fefesbabynumtwo]

They won't take your kids because you left an abusive relationship. Now if you stay and it's s bad environment for them, then they might get involved. Don't make excuses for him. He's a pos just leave.

[Sandysweets]

Im so scared of shelters, I was in foster care and I guess just afraid What if that happens to my kids.  And I'm Monday they tell me if I'm getting inducted at 37 or 38 weeks so I don't know I guess I was thinking let my baby be born first and then start to work. He is good to my son at least, I'm just miserable :(

[wyattsmom2015]

Leave you deserve better. If you have nowhere to go then go straight to the police department and they should know of a place you can go. Good luck and hope you get out.

[fefesbabynumtwo]

What an a$$hole! It's time for you to make some changes. Yes you do need to leave him. If you can't go to family which I think you should try that route. Just because they are church ppl and you think your black sheep doesn't mean they won't support you when you really need it. Maybe church will do you some good. But like I said if you can't go to a shelter. You have to put your foot down. With you being so close to delivering do you really want to have your baby in such a hostile relationship? You need to think of the baby and your son. What is the best for them?

[Baby1_2]

..... You already left once so you can do it again, I can't believe that your husband, the man that is supposed to love you is wishing you die giving birth!!!!! That is horrible.... I would seriously leave if my husband said that to me! Please think about your kids and do what is best for them!

[Baby1_2]

He sounds like a horrible man! You really need to leave him! You said you already