Really annoyed and idk if I'm right or wrong..

[beckyyy1115]

So I'm 22 years old expecting my first baby, 27 weeks along. My whole pregnancy I've tried to keep in touch with friends but they never really answer me or talk to me and I understand its because their young and enjoying life and going out and that's not what I choose. Anyway, I invited a friend to my baby shower. At first, she was very rude to me because she wanted her boyfriend to go but my baby shower is only for girls. And I don't even know her boyfriend, nor do I like how he treats her. I asked her again yesterday if she'd be there and she proceeded to tell me she'll go but she's not getting him anything because her 19th birthday is a week before and she needs to spend everything she has on herself.. Now, my issue isn't that she wouldn't get my baby anything. I don't even feel like that's what baby showers are for. Their for celebrating the new life, not gifts. But the fact she'd say that to me is really rude and I'm hurt by it. If she showed up with nothing, it wouldn't have ever bothered me. Its that she blatenly came out and said everything needs to be for herself. My son doesn't even need anything I just think its so rude! How would you feel?

[Chima7]

Becky your friend is totally immature. First of all, you're right that typically baby showers are for women and for her to insist that her bf needs to be there shows how immature she is. I can't believe she would even say that to you! Who brings their boyfriends to a baby shower? No one does because everyone knows that's not how it works!

Secondly, the thing about her being so selfish and telling you that she refuses to buy a gift because princess has a birthday at the same time, that's another huge sign of how immature she is. For her to tell you that she refuses to buy a gift for your baby because she wants to spend all of her money on herself is so completely selfish and rude of her to say to you! I would be upset too if any of my friends said something like that to me!

So anyway, the bottom line is, you're not wrong to be upset about this. I think you need to just stop talking to her and don't invite her or include her anymore. Maybe once she matures a little she might reach out to you but even if she doesn't, once your baby comes you can look for play groups and such in your area to meet other moms. You'll be fine without her I'm sure.

[beckyyy1115]

Thank you all so much for the advice and kind words! :) I knew posting on here would make me feel better cause we're all mommy's and soom to be mommy's. I felt like she was kinda disrespecting my son and he's not even born yet. I knew everyone on here would understand how I feel so really, I appreciate it :)

[Lizard8124]

I can totally relate with all of this. I learned when I was 17 that people will show their true colors when you are pregnant. They think that you are not good enough anymore, or that they don't wanna be tied down with a friend who has responsibility and obligations. It is selfish of them, but at the same time, it is their choice. However, that snotty remark about not getting the baby anything cause it needs to be all for her... that shows you right there the kinda person she is. I would not want someone like that in my life, personally. And it is true, you will lose friends durning this time, but better ones will come along. And these friends you lose, when they do grow up and find themselves in the same place you are right now, some of them will then try and reach out to you again. You are going to have to chose to open that door again or keep it shut. But that is up to you. It ***** and hurts, but you have a baby to think about and your health, forget all those people, they aren't worth your time! Hold close the people that are willing to be there for you, and appreciate the people who come into your life for here on! You honestly will find in the long run, you are better off!

[crystall92]

You will loose a lot of "friends" but don't worry about it. Once your baby is here you will not need anyone but him/or her I was 17 with a baby and lost a lot of friends. Too me this"friend" sounds selfish. You don't need to stress over things like this.

[Kristy112]

Let the kids play in their own kindergarden... :) same happens here, my second pregnancy, my first child is 1y8m now, way less friends..or... Maybe I should say - there can be only few true friends, others are just aquintances (hope I spelled it right, I am not everyday english speaking). :) and dont worry, by the years Youll see - when You will have a 7years old beautiful child and plenty of time for everything- others will be asking for Your advise or begging You to take part in their baby showers. Meanwhile. Focus on Your little wonder, dont pay attention to those little teens with piggy banks for their 19 birhdays, haha...

[beckyyy1115]

So I'm not wrong for getting mad at this?

[applejack7]

I was 23 going on 24 when I had my first. True alot of my friends didn't want to be friends anymore because of my daughter. I had to face facts, I was the only one in our group both married and had a baby. Only two friends stuck with me thru the years and I'm proud to say is still my friends. One of my friends even has a daughter of her own now. Now our usual meet up has turned into play dates. You'll make new friends don't worry bout it

[Sally4u]

She wasn't really a true friend to start with if she treats you and speaks to you like that...true friends stick by you no matter what...especially in your hour of need and respect you wishes

[tetez28]

I'm 22 with my first 2 chd I have no friends because I'm having a baby but I Dont need then anyways everyone not there for u anyways

[vannessa91]

You will definitely loose friends during pregnancy d9nt worry better ones come along later in life

[beckyyy1115]

I asked her a second time because she's basically the only friend I have. But she is conceited and selfish, you're definitely right about that. I told her I didn't want her there anymore and I told her I didn't wanna speak to her again until she grows up. She doesn't have kids, so I don't think she'll understand how I feel until she does.

[leo2121]

Your friend sounds super selfish and concieted. I wouldn't have bothered asking her to go the second time. If she wanted to go she would have showed up on her own.