Aa
arrested while pregnant?
Arrested at 2 months for domestic violence all I was doing was defending myself... He helped my daughters dad take my daughter away and now he wants to fix things! I also have permanent eye damage!
COMMUNITY LEADER
Maybe things were removed from here but I don't see any rude or judgmental comments. It's a hard situation. Just giving honest advice or opinions may feel like it is judgmental because it is a complex situation in which mistakes have been made. We either talk about that honestly or we don't.
I would love to see you plas --- get into a counseling program for yourself. Domestic abuse is such a cycle and not everyone will be a part of it. Something in the way you've been thinking is amiss and that is usually for a reason--- childhood events, feeling trapped now, fear from things going on now. But healthy thinking and a healthy emotional state makes us self protective. And this hasn't happened to you all the way up until these current events.
Women need to know that domestic violence laws in this country stink. People serve very little time for attempted murder or assault when it is within a relationship which is crazy! So, we have to protect OURSELVES. Not through our own violence, although you can certainly see how that happens. But by finding a way to not live in that situation. I'd consider beginning working with a woman's shelter explaining things fully. Although in the case against you, you are the aggressor, overall, you are a battered woman. True understanding will come with those that work with battered women. You may also need an advocate to work with you.
What is truly frightening is unless you have full documentation of what he is done to you---- the father of your young child and baby you are carrying could win custody of those kids.
I would look for whatever services you can find to get advice. And again, a battered womens shelter would be a good place to begin your search for those who can help you.
Kids should not suffer the trauma of parents in domestic disputes. I'm sorry your daughter witnessed this. I don't know what else to say about that. Kids need a peaceful home.
Anyway, these situations greatly sadden me and I wish I could help you. You are going to have to find support where you are from networks for battered women. They can help guide you. No woman should ever be hit or hurt like this. Ever.
I would love to see you plas --- get into a counseling program for yourself. Domestic abuse is such a cycle and not everyone will be a part of it. Something in the way you've been thinking is amiss and that is usually for a reason--- childhood events, feeling trapped now, fear from things going on now. But healthy thinking and a healthy emotional state makes us self protective. And this hasn't happened to you all the way up until these current events.
Women need to know that domestic violence laws in this country stink. People serve very little time for attempted murder or assault when it is within a relationship which is crazy! So, we have to protect OURSELVES. Not through our own violence, although you can certainly see how that happens. But by finding a way to not live in that situation. I'd consider beginning working with a woman's shelter explaining things fully. Although in the case against you, you are the aggressor, overall, you are a battered woman. True understanding will come with those that work with battered women. You may also need an advocate to work with you.
What is truly frightening is unless you have full documentation of what he is done to you---- the father of your young child and baby you are carrying could win custody of those kids.
I would look for whatever services you can find to get advice. And again, a battered womens shelter would be a good place to begin your search for those who can help you.
Kids should not suffer the trauma of parents in domestic disputes. I'm sorry your daughter witnessed this. I don't know what else to say about that. Kids need a peaceful home.
Anyway, these situations greatly sadden me and I wish I could help you. You are going to have to find support where you are from networks for battered women. They can help guide you. No woman should ever be hit or hurt like this. Ever.
don't worry about others rude comments. you have every right to get child support even if you don't need it. he helped make the child and should help pay for it. good luck to you and hope you can get this all worked out soon.
Thank you lady so much!
Thank you so much I'm in the state of California.
I'm sorry but out of all that it seems like all you got is child support. And excacly What I said is what happened. I've worked two jobs. Her father doesn't take care of her properly. He never wanted her. From the start. My daughter come back to me with rashes. She came back with fungas on her feet. So sorry idk what your thinking but maybe you should re-read. He started to come around once they started to garnished his wages. After a year and a half he told people that she was his dughter and denied her for a year and a half.I don't give a **** about money. My father is actually a very wealthy man and if I need something he steps in. When needed. My daughter isn't well tooken care of.
Your right. There is no reason to take little bits out for each bill. I don't get child support but my daughter gets ssi because she is disabled. All our income goes into one account and I pay the bills, buy the kids needed items and buy or pay anything else that comes up. The child support goes into household income and helps care for the child's needs like shelter, utilities, clothes, drs, transportation and so on. Good luck to you mother's who only have the financial help of court ordered child support to care for child because everyone knows it takes way more than that to care for a child.
Plas1983!! If you need support to help keep you home with your children so you can take care of them...that's important!! You do what you need to do for you and those kids!! You have support from us here!
Thank you wyattsmom2015 and king_brian_smith!!! Just seemed bullyish to me, and as someone who receives support, I hate seeing people attacked about how it's used. In the end, if your kids are taken care of and your not blowing it on booze and drugs while your kids have no food or clothes, it's all fair game. My current hubby now splits the bills, but makes more money, so we keep the support money for emergencies that come up, with a new house it's come in handy fixing the heater and plumbing issues...and finishing up the 3 thousand I owed my lawyer cause my daughter's father drags me to court for something every time he loses a girlfriend....
I hope ur situation will get better. It saddens me to known ur huge dilemma. May God give u strength throughout this whole ordeal. I wish I was able to help
@ Wyattsmom215 lol love you ladies tonight...but very true I agree with you guys.
@jenandrandal I Love people like you :-) I too can not stand to see someone be judgmental... You never know someone's situation so it's better to offer positive energy versus getting on here judging someone and letting them know you are miserable...
Why does it matter where the money goes? It would be the same as putting child support money on the household bills and kids clothes and paying the lawyer and bail with the money that is going to the rent, lights and clothes/ other child needs. It just more convenient to use their paycheck or income to pay the bills and buy the child's stuff with normal shopping. Then when child support checks come in pay other not as important bill or buy other things. The money is for the child and all of the money goes to the same place so there is no difference if you ask me. What crazy person has a separate account for child support and say well I need $50.00 out to pay on rent, $25.00 for utilities and tells their kid oh honey I can't buy all your clothes and stuff I can only get half because I need to get the other half of the money out of the child support account. Come on get real.
Huntergrace- I'm happy you have never had to go through this kind of stuff, while I agree support should not be used wildly and without thought for weather or not it benefits the children...I think if you don't know anything about the system, and haven't been through the stuff this woman is going through. The last thing you should do is judge and be negative.
Your opinion is not legally binding and your opinion is judgemental like it or not...part of my support was APL a special type of spousal support to pay my lawyer. Educate yourself before you judge people. I can walk into court tomorrow and tell them I used to money to repair my car, or pay my plumber and guess what...in the end it all benefits my children...no car, no transportation to where they need to go, oh and no job for me....duh...that's what the money's for. Sewage backing up into my basement...guess what, used support to pay the plumber...don't fix that...my children live in sewage, unable to take showers or use the bathroom. My opinion is you are uneducated and judgemental. So if I use it to pay my lawyer because my ex drags me back to court when he sees fit, btw same ex husband who took me back to court for fill custody, after our divorce, because he found out I was pregnant by my now hubby....3 years after our divorce, guess what he can pay my legal fees and we'll he is. Or I use it for emergency situations with my car, our home etc....court will in no way disagree with that....
Actually it's wrong. Its called.child support for a reason. For the kids. If they're needs are taken care of it should be in a account for them when they need something it's not called "pay my lawyer money" or "pay my bail money" I'm not judgemental its my opinion it doesn't sound like either of you should get any child support.
Huntergrace2015-dont be judgemental....8 am divorced, my daughters father pays support...I use it to pay my lawyer, I use the income from my job to cover my daughters needs. It doesn't matter what you use the support money for as long as the kids needs are taken care of...that's all court cares about. Up until I met my current hubby, my income paid all the bills and rent for my apartment with my daughters, and support money went to my lawyer and extra stuff like car repairs etc...my atty informed me that court and domestic relations really doesn't care what the money is specifically used for as long as the children are fed, clothed, sheltered
It is truly a terrible situation. You have rights. What state are you in. I want to inbox you some information.
Sorry but child support is for your kids not for your bail money. this. Sounds like one side to the story.
I have a daughter from a previous relationship. When my daughter was 3 1/2 I found out that her dad was cheating so I oobviously left. Couldn't let it go. I met my sons father. I got pregnant. When I was 6 months pregnant hr started hitting me. When my son turned 6 months I left him. 9 months later we decide to give it a try again. My son just turned one year and i had a party for him. So i invited his dad. He said he loved me that he wanted to try it again When he drinks he gets really volger. Found out he was talking to some girl from work tried to look past it but **** all that. This is about respect. I couldn't let it go. I called the cops on him twice. I know I know. I should of never of gotten back with him. I put myself in that situation. On a Friday I tried leaving again because once again I caught him talking to her he started to hit me. At the time I was two months pregnant. With our second child together. All grabbed him byhis neck and ddidn't let him go till he got off me. He was hitting like if I was man. And Im pregnant. This happen on a Fri. Two days later I saw that he was on the internet on some dating sight. So I tried leaving that Sunday. He woke up started hitting me because he didn't want me to leave with the car. He doesn't own a car. The only form of transportation was my car. So I yelled for my sister to call the cops. He shoved her and took her phone. I told her to get the other phone from our room idk if your aware but you can call 911 from any cell phone is doesn't need to be connected to a service provider. So I told her he shoved her and took it when he came back he was on the phone with 911. They showed up and becaude od the marks on his neck i was arrested. He told them that they where from that day. I had a busted lips sctapes bruses. They toom me in. It didnt matter that my sister told them what happend. My 3 year old daughter was yelling why he was hittkng her mommy. And i was still deames the aggresor. Now my daughter father all his family are cops. One of the times I called the cops he was the main unit that was dispatched to our apartment. So there was no avoiding that. So because I was arrested the court deemed me incompetent. And every other day he says his gonna call the cops on me because there's a criminal protection order. So last night I told him that I was going to ask for child support. I have to pay bail court fees. It's a lot. Domestic violence classes for 52 weeks at 35 bucks a pop. Can't do it. I'm drowning. So he said if I did that he was gonna screw me over to my having me attested. The judge said that because I put my daughter was put in that environment that's why hewas giving her dad soul llegal custody. It didn't matter that her dad has been in and out of her life.
There is something missing from your story. How did your children's father get them, is there an open case and were you found guilty or where you just arrested?
There is nothing that you and your ex need to fix. It seems that you have enough going on and he has already caused enough damage. Work on you and focus on your children.
There is nothing that you and your ex need to fix. It seems that you have enough going on and he has already caused enough damage. Work on you and focus on your children.
Put a restraining order on your bf. He sounds beyond crazy!
Yes I have too. I'm gonna end up back in jail. I just wish I knew why he is doing this to me. I guess he never did love me.
Your best bet would to be to stay away from him if all hes trying to start is drama.
Idk what I did to deserve this but I've never been in so much drama and craziness till I met this man.
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