I agree with the others. You say you met this guy two months ago, and already you want to get married and have him at your sons birth. And he has a background with a record. Men change how they are often to get what they want. For example. My mom was with the man I call my dad for 2 years. He was the perfect guy. After they got married, he changed and became his true self. He was abusive, an alcoholic and was good for nothing. In the end it was my sisters and I who payed the price for my moms choices. Think hard before going into s relationship so fast. You need to consider your well being and more importantly, your sons. Don't get me wrong. People do change. My dad finally did. But you can't just assume he's who he shows after so short a time. Parents do have a tricky way of being able to see more clearly than we can. They're not being the way they are to hurt you. Trust their advise.
You might not like my answer but I think it's what you need to hear.
It sounds to me like you have some self esteem issues and gravitate towards the absolutely WRONG type of man. I think you need to take a time out from relationship ...period!! You need to get some counseling to find out why you go for these kinds of men (sugar daddies, deadbeats and criminals)
In order to be the best possible mother for your son you need to learn to respect yourself and hold higher expectations in your partner. Not doing so could be detrimental to your sons outlook on life and how he treats women. I really think you need to take a step back and work on YOU for the moment. I think you parents are very concerned about you and have the best intentions at heart for you AND your son.
I've been there, I wish I had taken the steps necessary to help myself before it got out of control.
As for adoption, if this man has a criminal record he may not be ABLE To. It might be wise for you to have a conversation with his ex (the mother of his biological child) and see what she has to say. At this point it's likely she's not going to lie about anything, she has no reason to. Good luck, but please considering some counseling. I'm sure your parents will help you with it if you ask them.
I must say I sadly agree with LosingMyMind, I'm 20 years old as well and 27 and a half weeks pregnant as well! I'll be turning 21 just days before my babies due date.
I too am going to be a single mom, the father, my ex-husband is a total dead beat dad whom has another child with another woman whom he makes no effort to see and is just causing me more strife then good. He wants to be involved with this child yet he doesn't and it's horrible and complicated.
I too have had problems with dating the same kinds of guys it seems your interested in, and it all just leads to empty promises and tons of hurt. Especially now that you have a child in the mix their emotions will get wrapped up in the relationship as well, and you can't afford that around a guy like that.
I'm not saying this guy is full of empty promises, but I've come to realize parents are alot better of a gager of personality then we'd like to admit.
Take this time while pregnant and for the next little while to bond with your child, and to seek counseling to change your view on whom your attracted too in relationships. You deserve a loving man whom has a good job, has goals in life, similar hobbies, and will treat you and your son like royalty.
It ***** going through pregnancy alone I know, but in the end if you take this time it will make everything so much more worth while and will make you a stronger person in the end. Best of luck hun :)
First off I'm just going to say... if you wanted your parents to treat you more like an adult you've definitely gone about it the completely wrong way. They will never view you as an adult if you are making bad selfish life decision and relying on them to be YOUR caregivers. You won't even be taking care of this baby THEY will. You already said they pay for everything for you. Like Losingmymind said and I'm sorry if this sounds harsh but you need to go and see a therapist. You need to get off your *** and get a job and support this child yourself and you need to STOP dating losers. Seriously. I've dated some crummy guys (and have a daughter with one them) and I think that right now you feel like no one is going to want you because you are pregnant and/or going to be a mom. After I left my ex I was a single mom for about a year and then met the most AMAZING man. He doesn't have a criminal record, he supports himself, he respects women and he has his life in order. I know that you are scared but don't just jump into the new relationship that comes your way... wait for someone worth while since its in the best interested of you and your child. Also, like pamela said, sometimes parents have a way of seeing people and situations better than you yourself do. Your parents want what is best for you and I think that you should really count on their opinion. Before I decided to seriously give my DH a chance I asked my parents for their views on him and I sent my dad off to lunch with him and not only did my parents feel flattered that their opinion mattered but they gave him an honest chance. If you want your parents to start treating you like an adult you are going to have to stop acting like a child. Harsh I know... but true. Parents really do know what is best.
Clysta said it perfectly... perfectly!!!
2 months is hardly enough time to really know someone. Those first initial sparks when you meet someone are very strong... and can make you fall hard! But beware... I had a similar experience with a guy I dated. After dating for about 2 months, I thought he was "the one" and then slowly I started noticing things that just weren't right. Sure enough, he turned out to be a real weirdo and a pathological liar. I never thought I could be fooled so easily. (lucky I was only with him 4 months when I realized) My point is... be careful! keep your guard up, and don't assume he's the one you want to marry just yet. Give it time, and get to know him first...REALLY get to know him.
We all make mistakes, and some have harder consequences than others. Be thankful that your parents are being so supportive and helpful right now, and if you have to be a single mom, then you will be just fine! Don't rely on guys to support you... you CAN do it on your own. Furthermore... the guys you seem to be attracted to aren't the best characters from what it sounds like. Parents have a funny intuition about people... mine always did. They always knew the bad friends I had and they always knew the guys who were no good. In the end, I'd always find out the hard that they were right.
WHAT KIND of record does this guy have??? WHY was he in prison? These are very important things to know!!!
Good luck to you... either way you decide to go, you'll find your way...
Aside from my response above... after reading the other girls responses... they're all right girl! But in the end it's your life, and no mater what any of us say or anyone else says, its up to you, you're gonna do what you want anway. I just hope you make the best decision for your son.
Consider adoption...and I don't mean adoption by the new criminal...I mean guy in your life. Maybe I'm being harsh and insensitive, but all I can think about is how unfair it is for this innocent child to be born in this situation :o(