Masturbation Hurts

[Sept2015]

Found my husband masturbating after he returned from a two weeks trip away from home. Why couldn't he wait for me to come home from work. Should I be upset? Is that a red flag? He claims that while I'm 5months pregnant he finds me very sexy. But why not have sex with me then? I'm not really talking to him lately. What do you guys think? Am I being a B?

[K_Madrid]

You shouldn't be upset or hurt. Masturbating is a natural thing. My husband and I could have sex 3 times in one day and I'll walk in on him masturbating the next morning. I just giggle and tease him about it and he gets all shy about it. Sometimes I even help him finish off if I'm not in the mood. I guess I understand him because (tmi coming up girls, sorry) I love being intimate with him but sometimes I still feel like masturbating myself. It doesn't mean that I prefer masturbating over being physical with him. I could finish masturbating and I'll still want to be intimate with him. So you really shouldn't feel hurt or give him the silent treatment because of this. You should really talk this through with him to give you some ease.

[BonitaMichelle]

Maybe he was that horny he had to get off.   I wouldn't take it personal.  Maybe initiate some sex tonight

[lidilou]

Try not to take it personally. Talk to him. My husband says I look wonderful and all that but he won't have sex with me because he is afraid that he is hitting the baby in the head and will hurt him. Do they know how long they have to be for that to happen? Sorry.

[jessicups]

My husband master bated in the morning a few days ago, and then had sex with me that night. Everyone has different sexual needs, I wouldn't take it personally.

[areal10]

Maybe he just couldn't wait. I wouldn't read anything into it, you'll drive yourself crazy. But not talking to him isn't good either. My husband & I haven't had sex since I found out I was pregnant (I'm 32 weeks now). He says it makes him feel uncomfortable doing something like that knowing it baby is right there & moves around. I feel so big & dont feel comfortable at any time. I understand her had his needs because of how often we did it before. I know he probably does that when I'm not home or whenever. I feel better though knowing he may be doing that and not out relieving his needs with someone else. He still tells me how beautiful or sexy I look. I dont ever ask him directly though because I know that would embarrass him.

[GeekMom1213]

You're not talking to him lately, he's been away for two weeks... He's got physical needs, and a means to take care of them on his own. I wouldn't take it personally.
Talk to him without being defensive or accusatory and work it out... but knowing that he masturbated doesn't mean he doesn't want to sleep with you.

[Guitargrrrl]

Masturbation is normal. Sometimes you just need that release. Talk to him. If he has fears about hurting you, both of you should read up on pregnancy and sex. It'll ease both your minds and bring you closer together.  

[juniorsbabymama_2015]

He probably dont wanna have sex with you bc he dont wanna hurt the baby some men are that way

[Taki858]

I think it's normal to feel hurt but try not too. Communication is key. Try to be understanding and talk to him about it. I'm sure he loves you very much. Good luck love.