DELIVERY ROOM DRAMA HELP!!!

[nessgarcia1593]

So my family I have is extremely controlling I currently am bouncing bk between my mom n my sister's house due to being evicted cuz I had to stop workin cuz of how sick I was when I first found out I was pregnant n my job was a hour away n since my transmission went out I had no transportation.... my husband who is working extremely hard out of state for us to get a place is gonna miss the rest of my pregnancy till my bby about to be due im 18-19 weeks currently.  Long story short my doc's.... said i would never have kids duevto my health..so my bbys a miracle.. any who my sister already over stepped her boundary n ALREADY lued yo the doc n tol tgem she was me cuz she said she couldn't wait n wanted to SUPRISE me EVEN though she knew had been waiting over 2WEEKS for my test results for to cm in I was so upset I cried for 2 days straight she stole my moment! My parentswho I took with me to hear my bbys heartbeat were LITERALLY being so rude and obnoxious n were arguing n tellin eachother to shut up yes in my ultrasound the very first time I got to hear my bbys heartbeat ... I felt lk tge moment of my pregnancy I wanted to cherish my family has ruined for me so after discussing it with my husband cuz of how bad my family can get we decided to just mk the rest more intimate birth without them on the room arguing n try to take our bondin moment with our bby away... any who so my whole FAMILY is upset callin me selfish mkin me feel lk a bad daughter and sis my mom was there for my sis both births its her 3 grandchild y cant they respect my WISH to let me have a moment to myself my sis& mom has EXTREMELY bad anxiety n acts lk the mom off the water boy every thing is the devil n will mk u die! If I have any type of labor complications I dnt want  my sis n my mom freaking me out mkin things more intense in stressful my mom lks to ask alot of questions n trys to tell the docs what to do! Are we wrong for wanting it to be us till the afterbirth n then they are welcome to come in for the rest for pix ?? Or am I being selfish

[kthomp14]

I'm so sorry you have that to deal with. I can't even imagine. But no, you shouldn't feel bad at all. They've overstepped some serious boundaries. Having a baby is so exciting for the family that sometimes they forget it's YOU having the baby. Therefore, you make the decisions. No need to have more amazing moments with your baby ruined :)

[QueenB_82]

Dont be bullied into doing something you dont feel comfortable with. This is your body, your baby and your experience.
Hopefully you and hubby can be moved out before baby comes and it will make it easier to get to hospital and get settled before having to announce it to the parents that your even in labour.
Your family should support your decision whatever it is you choose to do

[QueenB_82]

Dont be bullied into doing something you dont feel comfortable with. This is your body, your baby and your experience.
Hopefully you and hubby can be moved out before baby comes and it will make it easier to get to hospital and get settled before having to announce it to the parents that your even in labour.
Your family should support your decision whatever it is you choose to do

[brittb08]

No you are not wrong, with my 1st baby I was a month pregnant or so and my younger sister hid it from everyone and finally came out and told everyone she was pregnant she was only a month before me. I was upset and mad she took my baby's name and my parents didn't understand and weren't there for me, it was stressful my sister was rude and mean to me and I was just stressed out and hurt. So I completely understand where you're coming from amd how you feel. So no you're not being selfish it's your life and your moment to cherish with your husband,plus you don't need the stress in the room when the baby comes out or much less when you're in labor.  So you guys go ahead and do what you think is best, your family will be family and they'll g wet over it once they see your baby after. It'll be ok just keep your head up! :)

[nessgarcia1593]

I want to thank all u LADIES for ur advice because they REALLY manipulated me into feelin bad the drama has continued till TODAY ... n yes at @narajo04 it got so bad I had to mk a password at my doc for the exact same reason cuz it got really bad I did that 2WEEKS ago @Carlos94,sbenson,tiaspilchuck4 I am REALLY and trying to seriously stand my my ground but see what mks things worse is my mother in law is over bearing and controlling as well n I WILL not let her in the room under no circumstances cuz shes tried multiple types to mk my husband leave me n mk him think my bby isn't his ! & there is no way I am 100% faithful n bad part is she lives states away she was putting such negative comments on my fb on all our positive thing so I deleted her she even attempted to pay my husband to leave me!... but see how they are makin me feel guilty is bc my sister who WAS my best friend the sibling I was most close to died in a tragic accident n my bby happens to b due 9 days after her death date fo my bossy lil sis acts lk her S*** dnt stink told my mom o mom well dnt worry ill have another bby for u n u can b in there then my sister yold me I was selfish that this wasn't just my bby.... uhhh excuse me yes it is .... so tjis morning she was texting me tellin me how grouchy I am n stressed I seem im completely out of my element hmless with no car need to find a job but no one wants to hire a preg woman. .. n I really miss my husband weve NEVER been in separate states for a long period of time on top of all that my sister holds things over ur head when she has to help .... thnx ladys for helpin me vent I stay with them so idk if I can hide when I go into labor due to they might have to drive me if my husband is mot bk fron outta state n my bby comes sooner.... but I will gladly take any other encouragement

[tiaspilchuk4]

My husbands mom is controlling and akes everything about her so we've decided we are not telling anyone when i go into labor.  We'll head to the hospital, enjoy the moment then call the family after ive delivered!!  

[sbenson]

I'm sorry you are having to deal with this. Sometimes family can be a blessing and sometimes they suck.. my husband and I are going to be there alone because we want our special moment without anyone else stressing us out, making us uncomfortable, etc. This is you and your husband's baby and not the whole family.  Do what you are most comfortable with because you won't get that moment again.  

[carols94]

Don't give into them. If this is going to be your only pregnancy you have a right to cherish it in privacy if you want. If they can't understand that then their not there for you in the right way.

[narajo4]

No u are not wrong or selfish. You need calm support during labor and especially once you start pushing. Sounds like you need to set boundaries now with all of them. Its hard, but will be best for you in the long run. I had issues with my x wanting info on pregnancy (I told him he wasn't welcome at appointments after showing up high to one) so he starting having his sister call pretending to be me to get info. So my Dr and I discussed a "code" phrase that has to be said or they will give no info out. It has helped. You can also give the nurses a list of who is and isn't allowed in your room during labor. I am being admitted as a "no info" patient because I do not want a bunch of drama. My suggestion start writing your birth plan, what you and your husband want. Make copies for everyone and just be blunt this is what we want and stand your ground. They may be mad but they'll get over it. Good luck