Aa
I Hate Him !
I went away to school out of state , around thanksgiving I started feeling sick .. come to find out , I was pregnant with my first child , I'm 17 years old my boyfriend of 4 years is 20 ... when i told him i was pregnant , he was excited , so I decided to go to a school closer to home - I have no kind of income so me & him came up with a plan .. for me to continue college & for him to just buy the things i need ( hair , clothes etc ) ... I am now 4 months & things are going down hill , he say i complain too much , I'm too moody & bossy ... All I did was ask him for $40 to get my hair done ; & that was Friday its now Monday & I still haven't gotten the money but when his friends ask him for money he give it to them no questions asked ... So when i fuss with him about things like that he would say stuff like " get out my face , get an abortion , I'll toss you the money for the abortion , how you trying to force a baby on me that I don't want " & stuff like that makes me sad ... I don't talk to him for days then he would contact me saying he's sorry & stuff like that , I just don't know what to do anymore ... Idk if I should just leave him or just put up with him ... & to make matters worst , my family dislike him !
Your 17. Do you know the price of rent where you live? Have you seen the power bill? Water, sewer,garbage? Grocery bill for a week? Add those up. Now add car payment, insurance, cable....How much does he earn after taxes? Is there enough to put into savings or are you both already living check to check? Go to store and price diapers and formula for baby for 1 month....after the baby comes, will there be any money left over to put 10% into savings each check, and have enough left over for your hair, nails etc?
I understand that you are frustrated that he won't give you money for your pleasure to spend...but do you know what it costs to support 2 people or a family of 3 with necessities?
If you have done all the math and he has an extra $1,000.00 to save or spend each month, then you may be right....he may be a jerk for not giving you a little extra cash now and then
If you have not done the math, and you don't know how little is left over each month, or if nothing us left, then you just may be the jerk in this.
Your boyfriend is not prince charming and can never be because he us simply a 20 yes old young man. I bet he did want to take care of you and baby, but he is too young to know what life really costs too.
Sounds like what you and boyfriend both need to do is grow up, quit calling names and blaming each other, and start problem solving together. How? Start be seeking free financial counselling in your area, sign up for budgeting classes, parenting classes etc. together so you can build a solid foundation for your new family.
It's time we all quit complaining about the babies dad's and start getting ourselves and them educated to raise a family. Sit and complain, or be the change you desire to see.
You need education
I understand that you are frustrated that he won't give you money for your pleasure to spend...but do you know what it costs to support 2 people or a family of 3 with necessities?
If you have done all the math and he has an extra $1,000.00 to save or spend each month, then you may be right....he may be a jerk for not giving you a little extra cash now and then
If you have not done the math, and you don't know how little is left over each month, or if nothing us left, then you just may be the jerk in this.
Your boyfriend is not prince charming and can never be because he us simply a 20 yes old young man. I bet he did want to take care of you and baby, but he is too young to know what life really costs too.
Sounds like what you and boyfriend both need to do is grow up, quit calling names and blaming each other, and start problem solving together. How? Start be seeking free financial counselling in your area, sign up for budgeting classes, parenting classes etc. together so you can build a solid foundation for your new family.
It's time we all quit complaining about the babies dad's and start getting ourselves and them educated to raise a family. Sit and complain, or be the change you desire to see.
You need education
Seriously? You should be happy he pays for it sometimes. Hair and nails are not necessary. You should be asking him to start getting things ready for ya'lls child not your looks. Especially since it's only one income that you can get stuff with.
U need to leave him and if ur family dislike him im sure its because they know how he is, i got with my 4 kids dad at a very young age so i can tell u by experience that what starts bad ends bad and if this is now at the biggining just imagine whats it woing to be like later and to make matters worse ur pregnant and hes telling u these horrible things!!! my kids dad started abuse by words then physical and i put up with it for 12 long yrs because i though i wouldnt be able to make it on my own and ive been happy ever since i left him 5 1/2 yrs ago i am now pregnant with my 5th baby and happy, if u decide to leave him talk with ur fam if they support u they will be there for u no matter what ur young and u can find someone that treats u better latter on u shouldn't let anybody treat u bad, leave him tell him u dont need people like him in ur life specially now that ur pregnant if he begs u or tells u hes sorry dont just forgive and go back make him show u hes ganna change with actions u need to think about ur self and ur baby not be focusing on him good luck
Take the $40 and spend it on stuff for the baby since you don't have a job. Your child is more important then your hair. You'll learn very quickly that things like your hair and getting your nails done and blah blah blah are out of the question once that baby is here.
Quayyy, it sounds like you could really use some clearer information from your doctor on what you can and can't, and what your at risk condition is.
No one is told at 14 weeks that they will need an "emergency c-section". Sounds like near your due date they'll schedule a c-section for you for whatever condition it is that makes you at risk.
I also think you need to have some serious discussions with him about budgeting and finances and whether he actually has enough money to support a family, and whether he wants to do that.
You're still so early on, you have time to get your ducks in a row and it seems unlikely if you keep the baby you will be able to continue going to college the next 4 years.
I don't know if you're on a full scholarship or have student loans, etc., so it's hard to tell how you're going to college with zero income.
Best wishes. This is a time to look ahead and make plans that will affect the rest of your life.
No one is told at 14 weeks that they will need an "emergency c-section". Sounds like near your due date they'll schedule a c-section for you for whatever condition it is that makes you at risk.
I also think you need to have some serious discussions with him about budgeting and finances and whether he actually has enough money to support a family, and whether he wants to do that.
You're still so early on, you have time to get your ducks in a row and it seems unlikely if you keep the baby you will be able to continue going to college the next 4 years.
I don't know if you're on a full scholarship or have student loans, etc., so it's hard to tell how you're going to college with zero income.
Best wishes. This is a time to look ahead and make plans that will affect the rest of your life.
I agree with his objection to the haircut, that's not a priority especially with all the expenses of having a baby. However, the way he is treating you is not healthy. I think it would be best to sit down and talk with him. Write down a list, before hand, of how you feel when he talks to you like that, how you feel being pregnant etc. Look at his side too though ask him what it is that frustrates him (makes him say the things he said),how he feels. Would you be willing to get a part time job? That way you can splurge some. In the end it's a good idea to ask yourself, what is best for you and the baby? What do you want the father of your child to look like? I hope this helps
my doctor do not want me to be working my pregnancy is high risk or something like that i have to have an emergency c section before my actual due date , I'm living with him my family turned their back on me ... I have no one else to turn to
I dont think I wud have asked for money for my hair... thats a bit much. However, that does not give him any right to speak to you that way. What a truly awful thing to say. Sounds like he really needs to think about what it is he wants and have a respectful adult conversation with you. I hope all works out for you... enjoy ur lovely baby.
He may be stressing he probably took the news different hes slashing out on you and that's not ok but I agree with the girls getting your hair done is not a priority anymore. And he should be saving his money too and giving money to his friends it's not a good thing either. You should lean on your family for support and focus on yourself and your baby.
I would honestly just let him go and let him think of his actions.. get a part time job and keep going to school many mom's have done it I did it with my 1st child... if he says his sorry and does it again then that should tell u his not sorry... if u don't put and stop to it now that's how it would be for the rest of ur life. And getting used to it or even putting up with it till the baby comes here is not a good option for u or the baby! Nothing is impossible! Might not be easy but nothing in life is headed to you... trust me I was high risk working full time and a part time and my daughter even came a month early which speeded things up for me. But I was able to get tru it! I did all on my own
on him is just plain stupid. He knows it takes two to make a baby. It's up to you though, only you can make that decision for yourself
Getting your hair done isn't a necessity so I don't understand why you're upset about that. You and your bf should be saving up whatever money you can for when the baby comes. He is being a jerk though by talking to you like that, and being pregnant you shouldnt be surrounded by so much negativity. Unfortunately this is what happens a lot of times when kids have kids or when pregnancies are unplanned. If I were you I'd leave. Telling your girlfriend to get an abortion is horrible and saying you're trying to force a baby
Well, personally, and this is just me, I think it would be foolish of him to throw away $40 on hair if money is at all short.
Some stuff you need, $40 hair appointments you don't. Unless you have an abundance of money.
Some stuff you need, $40 hair appointments you don't. Unless you have an abundance of money.
Sorry you have to deal with him and his mouth. Is ut possible you can get a part time job? I was able to work part time and go to school. He is showing his true colors and it's clear that you shouldn't trust him for providing for you.
I don't know what state you live in, but it's possible that him getting you pregnant was a felony.
But. I agree with 7ena. He doesn't owe you $40 to get your hair done. Since you don't have any money, you might want to try out a beauty school or supercuts for haircuts.
But. I agree with 7ena. He doesn't owe you $40 to get your hair done. Since you don't have any money, you might want to try out a beauty school or supercuts for haircuts.
That type of environment will stress you out and that's not good for you or the baby I say leave I know its easier said than done bit to be disrespected like that while pregnant isn't cool just leave and see what happens once the baby comes maybe he'll realize the baby is the most important thing around than enjoy your pregnancy and be safe and stress free mama
Well he should be more supportive but getting your hair done isn't a necessity but he should be more support and keep his end of the deal
And im 32weeks on thursday xx
He sounds like a ****. I would do what u thik is best im 19 on friday and been with babys dad for 2yrs he really supportive and helps me out alot. Ur still young and if he cant give u money but he can give his friends money then he obv dont care bout u. As long as u got support from ur family u should be okay:) chin up love xx
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