how to prepare for a divorce wen pg

[nessgarcia1593]

So today after my husband decided he was gonna throw a fit cause a hudge commotion... argue n mk me cry all day he then lk a bby calls his mother on me n has her txt me such rude things mind u I am high risk pregnant lost my first n took me 2 years later to get pregnant with this one! (my bby is a miracle bby I have ONE ovary PCOS n my other was removed due to 2enlarged tumors one weighing in at over 10lbs!)Then decides to yell at me whole im  on the ph with my mother WHILE tryin to meet up with my parents to get my house keys puts them in my marital bizz...THEN tells me that my bby is not his & I need to hsve my X RAISE IT !!!! remind u I stay at hm because my job was to far n we have one car and worked in different cities. ..  (we jus moved to a city where I know absolutely no one have no history of cheating on him) then continues to disrespect me n mk me cry .... long story short I have decided to go through with a LONG needed divorce n need to know how to completely keep him away n get a divorce because he is crzy n said he will tk my bby n I will NEVER see it again.How do I have my bby without having to give it his families name or have him on the birth certificate.It sounds harsh but if u knew his bkground u would understand.

[Princess305]

tell him its not his but then again tht may backfire i say get divirced NOW

[mw89]

This may sound awful but maybe if you make him believe its not his he will just go away.  If he's that bad then it may be worth it. You can put whatever name you want on the babies birth certificate.  After the baby is born go get papers at the court house for an uncontested divorce with no children and if they ask its not his. It may sound kind of like on the Maury show but if u ou truly believe he will bring nothing but hardship on the baby erase him from the situation. Sometimes you have to play dirty to protect your baby.
thete are great men out there who will love your baby.  I didn't think so until I found my guy.
If you don't mind me asking what state are you from?

[MommyOfThree9_19_14]

.even if they assume/presume he's the father cause they're married doesn' t mean she cant name her child Whatever she wants, the baby still doesn't have to have his last name.

[RockRose]

ness, I think there might be a small chance you aren't actually married.

It sounds like what you did was go through the process for an "informal marriage".  Did you go to the court house to get marriage licenses 3 days before this event,  or did you do it without obtaining marriage licenses?  

In an "informal marriage" you don't speak vows,  but you do have to sign them.  Did you sign anything?

There's a chance he didn't turn them into the courthouse.

It would be worth finding out.  Tomorrow call your local courthouse and ask how to obtain a copy of your marriage certificate.

[DallasMom11]

Hire legal representation. Get him to try and go for an uncontested divorce. If not then get ready for a long and expensive legal battle.

Either way, lawyer up and take care of you and your baby.

[kaysie03]

You can name your child wat you would like but he would still be listed as the father.*

[kaysie03]

Yes in texas if you married hes automatically pressumed to be the father. If you weren't he would have to sign a acknowledgment of paternity. It seriously bugs me when people answer questions they think they kno the answer to but aren't forsure. You can call the hospital and ask to speak with a social worker, and they may be able to give some advice, and can also explain things further.

[Faithh_v]

Why does it always have to be those "perfect" moms that give the negative comments "i wonder why you chose to stay with him if his crazy"  be quiet give good advice or keep it shut . She is already going through a hard time personally physically and emotionaly .who are you to judge ?  You wonder well keep wondering cause youll never know !

Nessgarcia1593 Im sorry i just had to say that no ine needs negative comments specially going through this . Seek out help , court system and gather up your evidence if you can move away from him so you and your babycab be healthy . I hope the best for you two may God bless you .

[MariaGS]

In TX just because you're married doesn't mean his last name has to be on the birth certificate. Here they let you choose weither you want him to sign, last name & if you
Want him there! Hope this helps & good luck(:

[rod3]

I understand...my friend got pressured into marriage from family (cultural thing) luckily is a a good guy...just not love. Just look into ways to protect u and the baby. I hope he turns out to be a good father for the child at least...but if not, baby has you! But yes laws vary from state to state when it comes to fathers

[nessgarcia1593]

Thnx u to every one who replied so to basically give u a understanding uuuuuuu live I. Tx n how we started was basically it was a friend ship that turned into a relationship that somehow got guilted into a marriage .... I say that because I dnt have a ring nor dud I have a ceremony nor did we say vows I literally knew someone who was ordained who jus signed the papers @rockrose if you read my post my bby was a miracle I had no idea docs told me I would never b able to have a kid n if I did I would miscarry my first to second month I DIDN'T find out I was pg till almost 3.... I do not believe in abortions

[MommyOfThree9_19_14]

.actually he does not have to be on the Birth Certificate just cause yur married, yu can qive yur baby any last name in the world yuu choose...it could be yur mom or dad's last name or a made up name if yu choose, nobody can tell yu wat to name yur child or put on the Birth Certificate...&n if yu also chose to do that &n qive yur baby yur family's lastname then once yur divorce is final all yu have to do is switch yur last name bak to watever was oriqinal &n already have to hassel saved of tryin to chanqe yur baby's...i hope yu have a save delivery &n blessed remaininq preqnancy, GL..

[rod3]

im sorry you are going thru this. Im not sure the laws in your area. Where do you live? I do not have trouble with my hubby but In Ca, he cant even sign the birth certificate unless I say it is okay. He is only allowed to be at the hospital if I say it is okay...it is so much more harder for the dads here

[Gianas234]

I would get an order of protection to keep him away even dough at times it wont work because its a sheet of paper he can go to jail at any time of being near you. He would not be able to go to the hospital or your home change everything phone number key locks and when it comes down to the birtg certificate you dont need his last name althought you are married and most likely have his so the baby would have any last name you have.

[RockRose]

Since you're married,  the baby is presumed to be his when it's born.  He can take you to court and demand visitation/partial/sole custody.  

Most states won't finalize a divorce while you're pregnant,  so when the baby arrives you will still be married.  In cases where the father has committed murder or something truly hideous,  states will usually finalize a divorce during a pregnancy.

And I agree with Saraaa.  If he's really that crazy I wonder why you chose to have a baby with him.

[SaraaaBMendivil]

Just say it's not his baby that you don't know who the father is if he's really that crazy you shouldn't have your baby with someone like that

[krissyrmsy]

I'm going through a divorce but if your pregnant while married there's nothing you can do, courts will automatically establish paternity when baby is born so you can have a lovely custody battle. There's is my 4th pregnancy so I found the only way to save this baby from an abusive man who did drugs was to do an adoption. Obviously this is your first baby so your going to have to fight for him/her. Best thing to do is separate and NEVER talk to him so when baby's born you can show he didn't participate and he didn't ask about the pregnancy or baby. That's what I'm doing. You can have s private labor so nobody can come to the hospital unless you tell them to so if he finds out the front will turn him away and you can tell the hospital you don't want him on the birth certificate and he won't be.