losing "friends"

[chelslouidd]

Before I found out I was pregnant, I found myself  surrounded by all the wrong people. I had a problem with drugs and alcohol but it didnt seem obvious to me considering all my friends and alot of my family members were doing it too, as was my boyfriend. When I found out I was pregnant, I had distanced myself from all of them as well as I could. My boyfriend wanted to go to my brothers house to hangout because they were having a few beers. While on my way there from leaving my parents, I recieved a phone call from my sister saying our parents left to go get "****** up" and that she wanted me to come get her. I turned around and picked her up, but before hand I called my brother letting him know that our younger sister was coming with me. When we got there, literally everyone was on drugs except for me, my little sister, and my boyfriend. There were about twenty people there and they were all doing drugs in front of my little sister, and even offered some to my boyfriend, who was then very drunk but had been clean for a month. I was highly disappointed in all of my "best friends", brother, his girlfriend, and all of my cousins that were there, for not only doingdrugs in front of my sister but also trying to give some to my boyfriend who was about to be a father and was freshly clean from drugs. We left immediately and a week or so after this incident I had got into an argument with my brothers girlfriend for making it highly difficult to get ahold of my brother, who worries me to death. She is a bad influence on my brother for the fact that she has no interest in getting clean and doesnt tell my brother its a bad idea to indulge in drugs but instead incourages it because she also likes to indulge. While getting into this argument with her about my brother, i told her all of this . I told her and my brother that i no longer wanted to be around anyone that wanted to use drugs, no matter if we were family or not, that i just wantrd to create a healthy environment for my child and that anyone that uses wouldnt be apart of my babys life either.  Her and her sister then told me that i was jealous that i couldnt party or do drugs because i was pregnant. This angered me so much. I told the two (who i considered family) that if they straightened up or not, they wouldnt be apart of my babys life, ever. I told my parents about my brothers drug use and how they did drugs in front of my sister. My brother and his girlfriend told my mom that i was lying and that i have lost my mind. Well, its been a couple weeks and i havent heard from my brother or bearly any of my cousins for that matter. The fact that they would rather be under the influence than straighten up to be in my babys life hurts me so badly but i will stick to my word with hopes that they change or at least my brother does. I have found myself alone and dont know how to deal with this, it is causing me to be very depressed and cry very frequently. I am however very thankful to have my boyfriend (the father of my fourteen week unborn baby) in my life who is now working and clean ! Input please !? Also if you took the time to read all of this then i thank you because this has been bothering me badly !

[TANtina]

You've done an awesome job distancing yourself from that and I'm so glad to hear your bf is in it with you. Like the other ladies said, keep doing what you're doing and make sure you and your bf both find new, healthy activities to help fill the void that cutting off the old stuff creates. Creating healthy habits you genuinely enjoy is vitally important in keeping you away from the bad longer term... and you don't have to feel like you're in it alone. Build a positive support network with accountability partners and know that each day you and bf stay clean and away from negative influences is one more day you've made a bright, love filled future possible for your Little One.  :-) God bless love. Xoxo

[mz_mila]

I think its great that you and your bf got clean. Although it may hurt you to cut ppl off youll be better in the long run. You don't need your child growing up in that environment b/c they'll think that its ok. Best of luck to you and stay strong your doing the right thing and don't let anyone tell you other wise

[ramyamommy]

Drug addicts aren't friends
Why don't you try looking for a pregnant women's social gathering or yoga class for pregnant women
Or even try orchestrating something yourself for other mothers to be in your area
There are so many other mothers to be that have  lost friends simply because they got pregnant and are feeling lonely and confused just like you

[odessa1982]

Losing a friend? Yes it is sad.But having a miracle inside your belly kicking is amazing. Your baby is your new life now. You did the right  decision and keep it up. Just think of your health and for the baby. Enjoy your pregnancy every moment of the day :)

[chelslouidd]

I have been trying so hard to not stress but today is my brothers birthday and i dont know if im even going to tell him happy birthday for the way he has been acting towards me. He is a year and a month older than me and we have been best friends for a long time until i told him I didnt want to be around him or anyone that uses anymore. My parents have been telling me to not be so mean and that things will get better but i am scared to even chance that i will raise my baby around all the wrong people that would be no type of role model. Feeling so alone when you thought you had all the best friends you could have ***** because they really werent my friends at all and i feel like they never really cared for me . I am being called stuck up for not wanting to be around those type of people  when i used to be one of them and i have so many against me but no one understands that im going to be a mom now and i want to be the best mom i can possibly be. I just wish my baby was here already. Twenty six more weeks to go !

[Aubrey88]

That's amazing! Good for you and your boyfriend for getting out of that type of environment for yourselves and unborn child. It's sad to say but there comes a time in life when you find out who's good for you regardless if they are family or friends. You aren't the one missing out on knowing your future child they are and they will realize it eventually. Keep doing what your doing! Take pride and be happy that you're doing right try not to be sad or depressed. You should be ecstatic you have a lot going for you now.

[Vondiesmithh]

It's very good that you took the negativity out of your life and that you and your boyfriend are doing good for the sake of your baby. Do not stress about it I know it will be hard not too but you have too you stressing will put your baby at risk whatever you feel your baby feels. It's gonna be okay even if they don't come around you know you tried at the end of the day and that you did what you had to do